hi i have just joined SH and believe it is a great site. I am a single male(yes i know what u are thinking!!) BUT i am genuine and looking for couples in my area for meets, fun friendship. AS a new person on SH i do enjoy the chatrooms but feel that it is difficult to become integrated in the chats sometimes as some groups are a bit clicky. I am as i say a genuine swinger and am hoping SH will provide the chance to meet genuine couples in my area not only for great fun but also good friendships. Can anyone offer any advice or pass on their experiences when they first joined thanks
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how difficult is it to become known as im new on SH??
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simple answer is stick with it. If you keep going in same ..preferably local chat room..you will fine people start to get to know you. Try wherever possible to join in with the chatter. Get yourself along to any socials that are going on local..and then all of a sudden people will see you and know you as genuine. If your patient and genuine you will find this is a great place to be.
Good luck.
Good luck.
Sex God
I fink u got 2 tlk 2 ppl 2 get 2 no dem b4 u can fuk dem init u do wat dean sed u b ok
gud 2 c u dale
gud 2 c u dale
Quote by deancannock
simple answer is stick with it. If you keep going in same ..preferably local chat room..you will fine people start to get to know you. Try wherever possible to join in with the chatter. Get yourself along to any socials that are going on local..and then all of a sudden people will see you and know you as genuine. If your patient and genuine you will find this is a great place to be.
Good luck.
about sums it up what dean has said .....but the one piece of advice i would give is :shock: dont be put off by the ignorance in the chat rooms , you will be ignored and not talked to and you will reply and not get a response
:? :? :? yes they are a clicky lot in there but bear in mind they probably have been chatting for ages together :shock:
and on this site I suppose you have to earn your spurs that you will stick around hence why it takes time to get known and trusted to chat to :P :P
So many come and go here as its a free site and I am only guessing that you have to put your time in to get noticed and appreciated for whatt you are ..ie: honest respectable genuine......try the forums its a gr8 place to get known and talk to people ??? there will be jibes there will be praise there will be a shed load of fun ..... but above all welcome to the site have fun chill and dont take it too seriously
:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
from grandad travlinmanukok
aka steve ( the guy with the big )
heart x
Right... a ladies thought!
Fill in your profile page and message in well, not too long, but more than one line!
Place photos on....very important!!
Go in chat.....be plesant, chatty, funny, say hi to the room, and chip in with type, dont just sit back and watch the type!
Post in here, as and when it takes your fancy!
It is not a instant meet site, usually, so sit back enjoy it all, and wait for the right person to click with you....it can be done!
Welcome x
Lucys post.
Fill in your profile page and message in well, not too long, but more than one line!
Place photos on....very important!!
Go in chat.....be plesant, chatty, funny, say hi to the room, and chip in with type, dont just sit back and watch the type!
Post in here, as and when it takes your fancy!
It is not a instant meet site, usually, so sit back enjoy it all, and wait for the right person to click with you....it can be done!
Welcome x
Lucys post.
Quote by Lucyandmike7
Right... a ladies thought!
Fill in your profile page and message in well, not too long, but more than one line!
Place photos on....very important!!
Go in chat.....be plesant, chatty, funny, say hi to the room, and chip in with type, dont just sit back and watch the type!
Post in here, as and when it takes your fancy!
It is not a instant meet site, usually, so sit back enjoy it all, and wait for the right person to click with you....it can be done!
Welcome x
Lucys post.
... and a gay man's thoughts! Not that you want to attract gay men, but we think a bit like ladies and you ain't in 'competition' with us - think about it, it does make sense
Like Lucy said:
1. Fill in your profile properly
2. Put photos on it - preferably face pics or at least a reference that you have them if you don't feel comfortable with that
3. Post here
4. Try Chat if it works for you but the dynamic is a lot different to the Forums (faster)
5. Don't become your stereotype (if you imagine the worst it will likely happen)
6. Don't view yourself as secondary or any less important than any other member of this community - many of the single guys on here behave in a submissive way to couples and single females. I'd wager most of them don't really find it very attractive. Being polite and confident doesn't mean being a pushover.
7. Avoid making statements like "wow, you are the sexiest person I've ever seen on here..." It's bullshit and makes you sound like a prat (IMHO)
Be yourself, don't whine about lack of replies to ads. etc and just behave naturally, maybe as you would do in a group of friends out in a bar/pub.
Good luck :thumbup:
Quote by Lucyandmike7FACE PICS ??? a deff no no ...put them in to your private , then if there are genuine replys they will ask for them and you can choose to send them if its a GENUINE reply :shock: :shock: :shock:
Right... a ladies thought!
Fill in your profile page and message in well, not too long, but more than one line!
Place photos on....very important!!
Go in chat.....be plesant, chatty, funny, say hi to the room, and chip in with type, dont just sit back and watch the type!
Post in here, as and when it takes your fancy!
It is not a instant meet site, usually, so sit back enjoy it all, and wait for the right person to click with you....it can be done!
Welcome x
Lucys post.
steve
Quote by The_third_man
as above, Keep going in chat, keep chipping in, be cheeky and join in others convos as long as they are not intimate (well you maybe welcomed in even if they are ;)
It took me awhile but there are some great people in here so was worth the effort.
And welcome by the way
You pulled yet 3rd man????
Quote by Lucyandmike7
Right... a ladies thought!
Fill in your profile page and message in well, not too long, but more than one line!
Place photos on....very important!!Go in chat.....be plesant, chatty, funny, say hi to the room, and chip in with type, dont just sit back and watch the type!
Post in here, as and when it takes your fancy!
It is not a instant meet site, usually, so sit back enjoy it all, and wait for the right person to click with you....it can be done!
Welcome x
Lucys post.
That for us is a major thing to start with.
No pics or nothing written in a profile, and we just ignore it.
IF you are looking for meets, a filled out truthful profile goes a long way. We know of many couples like us, that would never respond or reply to a guys advert that had no pics ( or at least have some in a private gallery )or no profile.
This has been discussed before on here many times. I feel it is even more important for a single guy to do this, as you are def in the majority so......you really have to put yourself out IF you want meets.
Guys that want to meet but do not have these things, God knows how they ever get meets ( or maybe not genuine at all! ).
Good luck though.
Quote by kentswingers777
Right... a ladies thought!
Fill in your profile page and message in well, not too long, but more than one line!
Place photos on....very important!!Go in chat.....be plesant, chatty, funny, say hi to the room, and chip in with type, dont just sit back and watch the type!
Post in here, as and when it takes your fancy!
It is not a instant meet site, usually, so sit back enjoy it all, and wait for the right person to click with you....it can be done!
Welcome x
Lucys post.
That for us is a major thing to start with.
No pics or nothing written in a profile, and we just ignore it.
IF you are looking for meets, a filled out truthful profile goes a long way. We know of many couples like us, that would never respond or reply to a guys advert that had no pics ( or at least have some in a private gallery )or no profile.
This has been discussed before on here many times. I feel it is even more important for a single guy to do this, as you are def in the majority so......you really have to put yourself out IF you want meets.
Guys that want to meet but do not have these things, God knows how they ever get meets ( or maybe not genuine at all! ).
Good luck though.
An excellent post kentswingers ...I tip my hat
and good sound advice to a new guy starting up the best and most informative advice on this thread yet :D :D :D
steve
Sex God
Quote by Dalehart2008
hi i have just joined SH and believe it is a great site. I am a single male(yes i know what u are thinking!!) BUT i am genuine and looking for couples in my area for meets, fun friendship. AS a new person on SH i do enjoy the chatrooms but feel that it is difficult to become integrated in the chats sometimes as some groups are a bit clicky. I am as i say a genuine swinger and am hoping SH will provide the chance to meet genuine couples in my area not only for great fun but also good friendships. Can anyone offer any advice or pass on their experiences when they first joined thanks
I think I am going to be more blunt than a lot of the other people that have replied.....
I don't know if you are going to like my answer.... but I believe there is an old adage that rings true...
"you get out what you put in"
There is no magic shortcut....I hate to tell you this from the start
I think most sucessful people on here will say they have taken the time and the effort to get themselves known... whether that is in the forum, or in the chatroom, or by going to the countless socials/munches on the site... or a million and one other ways....
what you call "clicky" I would call "familularity"... i.e if you went into a pub, would you expect the locals to talk to you like old friends straight away, or what you take the time to get to know them......... exactly the same principle
we use to in here on regular occasions have a glut of people asking "well why don't I have any success" and then you'd notice:
it is there first post in here, so you wouldn't have a clue who there in the first place,
or whether there profile is blank except for n/a's,
or whether an ad is just one line and a cock shot....SH hasn't started charging by the word, So go out and use them and sell yourself!!!!
help yourself to actually help yourself!
the site does gives you all the tools, it is how you decide to use them, or make advantage of them that makes the difference..... that is the real key
hope that makes sense....it did in my head
sean
I must sort of share this with you!
I have just opened a messaage from a unknown guy to me, in my mail box, dont know how he found me as we do not have an ad on.
The message was started hello Lucy and Mike, always a good opener, makes us realise they are not copy and pasting!
It went on to personalise things he had read in our profile message, again, shows he actually read it, and not just looked at the piccys!
Was polite, not down right mucky, like some of the messages I have read!
Told us a bit about himself, what he was looking for.
He typed it with respect.
I have checked his profile out, that is something I do not always do, as some of the messages recieved frankly do not deserve a profile check!
I totally agree with Fabios comments , you get out what you put in!
I have just opened a messaage from a unknown guy to me, in my mail box, dont know how he found me as we do not have an ad on.
The message was started hello Lucy and Mike, always a good opener, makes us realise they are not copy and pasting!
It went on to personalise things he had read in our profile message, again, shows he actually read it, and not just looked at the piccys!
Was polite, not down right mucky, like some of the messages I have read!
Told us a bit about himself, what he was looking for.
He typed it with respect.
I have checked his profile out, that is something I do not always do, as some of the messages recieved frankly do not deserve a profile check!
I totally agree with Fabios comments , you get out what you put in!
Quote by kentswingers777
Right... a ladies thought!
Fill in your profile page and message in well, not too long, but more than one line!
Place photos on....very important!!Go in chat.....be plesant, chatty, funny, say hi to the room, and chip in with type, dont just sit back and watch the type!
Post in here, as and when it takes your fancy!
It is not a instant meet site, usually, so sit back enjoy it all, and wait for the right person to click with you....it can be done!
Welcome x
Lucys post.
That for us is a major thing to start with.
No pics or nothing written in a profile, and we just ignore it.
IF you are looking for meets, a filled out truthful profile goes a long way. We know of many couples like us, that would never respond or reply to a guys advert that had no pics ( or at least have some in a private gallery )or no profile.
This has been discussed before on here many times. I feel it is even more important for a single guy to do this, as you are def in the majority so......you really have to put yourself out IF you want meets.
Guys that want to meet but do not have these things, God knows how they ever get meets ( or maybe not genuine at all! ).
Good luck though.
I have met guys without pictures but have a cam.
I personally think a cam is better as you can talk to the person and tell more from seeing them then, I would never rely on a picture, I have been stung like that once in the beginning and wasted money to meet for a drink.
Quote by Truescorpio
1. Fill in your profile properly
Ahem - fill in your profile CORRECTLY. Grammar young man!
Quote by BIoke
2. Put photos on it - preferably face pics or at least a reference that you have them if you don't feel comfortable with that
Women on here get well over 100 messages per day in many cases - and you'll be lucky if she even looks at your profile. If you dont have face pics up shes not going to bother chasing you for them when there are so many other guys who do.
Quote by BIoke
3. Post here
What, underneath you?
Actually dont answer that...
Quote by BIoke
4. Try Chat if it works for you but the dynamic is a lot different to the Forums (faster)
Indeed - you'll be ignored after a few minutes, as opposed to instantly!
Quote by BIoke
5. Don't become your stereotype (if you imagine the worst it will likely happen)
The stereotype of the 'disillusioned single male swinger' is generally an overweight, middle aged hairy guy with so much BO you can practically smell the frangrance of sweat, socks and Olde Spice wafting off the PC screen when you look at his three sentence profile (which will typically reference his '8 inch cock').
...which is why most people are STUNNED when they read about the guy behind some of the things I write!
Quote by BIoke
6. Don't view yourself as secondary or any less important than any other member of this community
...no I'll get in trouble (again!)
Quote by BIoke
7. Avoid making statements like "wow, you are the sexiest person I've ever seen on here..." It's bullshit and makes you sound like a prat (IMHO)
Pregnant fish kiss alot of ass do they?
Quote by BIoke
Be yourself, don't whine about lack of replies to ads. etc and just behave naturally, maybe as you would do in a group of friends out in a bar/pub.
Fart, belch, whine about work, scratch your yourself shamelessly and complain that its not your round?
Was that valuable or helpful in any way to the guy that posted the thread or even necessary?
Quote by Theladyisaminx
Right... a ladies thought!
Fill in your profile page and message in well, not too long, but more than one line!
Place photos on....very important!!Go in chat.....be plesant, chatty, funny, say hi to the room, and chip in with type, dont just sit back and watch the type!
Post in here, as and when it takes your fancy!
It is not a instant meet site, usually, so sit back enjoy it all, and wait for the right person to click with you....it can be done!
Welcome x
Lucys post.
That for us is a major thing to start with.
No pics or nothing written in a profile, and we just ignore it.
IF you are looking for meets, a filled out truthful profile goes a long way. We know of many couples like us, that would never respond or reply to a guys advert that had no pics ( or at least have some in a private gallery )or no profile.
This has been discussed before on here many times. I feel it is even more important for a single guy to do this, as you are def in the majority so......you really have to put yourself out IF you want meets.
Guys that want to meet but do not have these things, God knows how they ever get meets ( or maybe not genuine at all! ).
Good luck though.
I have met guys without pictures but have a cam.
I personally think a cam is better as you can talk to the person and tell more from seeing them then, I would never rely on a picture, I have been stung like that once in the beginning and wasted money to meet for a drink.
good point minxy about cams :P :P :P
i have one now and find it far better when trying to get to know someone
:wink: :wink: much easier and better than ping pong mail .
steve x
Sex God
in my opinion becoming known is the last thing you would want here..much better to be an unknown that just gets on with swinging..
hi all, i just wanted to say a BIG thank you to everyone who has taken their time to leave their advice. I only posted my topic yest afternoon and to be honest really only expected one or two replies. But couldnt believe how many people had replied. I not only really appreciate it and have taken all the advice in but it has also shown to me how genuine the people on SH are.
I never thought that joining SH would mean instant meets and i realise it is like moving into a new community and being accepted and welcomed in. Ironically, i thought i had put a picture on my profile and had typed a bit about me and I hadnt!! But have rectified that now (hint hint). Its still gonna take a bit of time to get use to using the forums but im sure perseverence will bring many benefits in time.
To those people who have given their valuable advice and experience many thanks but would appreciate any other input people have to offer. Ian
I never thought that joining SH would mean instant meets and i realise it is like moving into a new community and being accepted and welcomed in. Ironically, i thought i had put a picture on my profile and had typed a bit about me and I hadnt!! But have rectified that now (hint hint). Its still gonna take a bit of time to get use to using the forums but im sure perseverence will bring many benefits in time.
To those people who have given their valuable advice and experience many thanks but would appreciate any other input people have to offer. Ian
Sex God
Quote by Dalehart2008
hi all, i just wanted to say a BIG thank you to everyone who has taken their time to leave their advice. I only posted my topic yest afternoon and to be honest really only expected one or two replies. But couldnt believe how many people had replied. I not only really appreciate it and have taken all the advice in but it has also shown to me how genuine the people on SH are.
I never thought that joining SH would mean instant meets and i realise it is like moving into a new community and being accepted and welcomed in. Ironically, i thought i had put a picture on my profile and had typed a bit about me and I hadnt!! But have rectified that now (hint hint). Its still gonna take a bit of time to get use to using the forums but im sure perseverence will bring many benefits in time.
To those people who have given their valuable advice and experience many thanks but would appreciate any other input people have to offer. Ian
Just be yourself. :thumbup:
We can all give hints and tips, some even give hints and tips on what not to do. As long as you are comfortable, having a good time and having respect for the people around you, you'll be fine! :mrgreen:
The best advice I have had on this site was as follows;
BIoke's helpful tips for being accepted more easily into Chat:
1) Use CAPITALS - it makes you stand out as everyone always uses lower case
2) Whisper people frequently - especially the users with little single pink icons by their names
3) Finally (and people really like this) - if there is anyone on cam tell them exactly what you think they should be doing. Ask them repeatedly too as they may not see the first time. After all, it's like the tele, they are there for your enjoyment
And as for your profile; put loads of cock shots in it.
Dont use a web cam, keep em all guessing
Good luck on SH...
BIoke's helpful tips for being accepted more easily into Chat:
1) Use CAPITALS - it makes you stand out as everyone always uses lower case
2) Whisper people frequently - especially the users with little single pink icons by their names
3) Finally (and people really like this) - if there is anyone on cam tell them exactly what you think they should be doing. Ask them repeatedly too as they may not see the first time. After all, it's like the tele, they are there for your enjoyment
And as for your profile; put loads of cock shots in it.
Dont use a web cam, keep em all guessing
Good luck on SH...
Sex God
hello n welcome hun hope you find lots of fun
get yourself onto the LETS MEET UP forum and look for socials you fancy attending its a great way of meeting people
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
get yourself onto the LETS MEET UP forum and look for socials you fancy attending its a great way of meeting people
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sex God
Quote by Dirtygirly
hi all, i just wanted to say a BIG thank you to everyone who has taken their time to leave their advice. I only posted my topic yest afternoon and to be honest really only expected one or two replies. But couldnt believe how many people had replied. I not only really appreciate it and have taken all the advice in but it has also shown to me how genuine the people on SH are.
I never thought that joining SH would mean instant meets and i realise it is like moving into a new community and being accepted and welcomed in. Ironically, i thought i had put a picture on my profile and had typed a bit about me and I hadnt!! But have rectified that now (hint hint). Its still gonna take a bit of time to get use to using the forums but im sure perseverence will bring many benefits in time.
To those people who have given their valuable advice and experience many thanks but would appreciate any other input people have to offer. Ian
Just be yourself. :thumbup:
We can all give hints and tips, some even give hints and tips on what not to do. As long as you are comfortable, having a good time and having respect for the people around you, you'll be fine! :mrgreen:
Absolutely. Oh and :welcome:
