As others have said, make it crystal clear beforehand that the first meet is social only and merely to find out whether you do click. It might even be worth saying that you never make up your mind whether to commit to something as fundamental as playing until the next day or so (to give you a chance to avoid being put on the spot at the meet) - but that could be OTT.
In some ways if they do get cross at the meet, even though there might be an awkward moment, it is likely to make disengagement easier provided they are reasonable people.
One thing I would say is, don't make up reasons as to why you don't want to play - especially if the reason implies that it is their fault. That will induce a justifiable angry reaction from them. Just say 'we don't click' - people will respect you more for it.
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Still to have a meet with another couple but we've decided best to meet on neutral ground such as pub or hotel and see how it goes from there. Also trying to find people locally rather than other end of country!
Thanks for all the great advice. We have decided to try out a social or two ( if we can find any here in london) and meet people if we can that way. Meet up for a drink then if we click with anyone then its all good but if not we made some friends instead.
Louise xx
Louise
We've had two meets with couples so far, the first one it was electric for all four of us, we've met again (great flirting, snog and grope...mmm) and now we have our first swing adventure in a hotel session booked for Friday (wish us luck!). The second was very different, nice people but not really looking for the same thing. I have to say I chickened out to saying a proper No, but did it in a clear but softer way. I think they thought we were newbie timewasters wanting to get information, that was partly true but we just didn't click. Personality is key to us.
Maybe it gets easier to say No.
pink x
p.s. Louise, we are going to the North London social, not sure if still spaces for couples, see LMU forum.
behave, you know you're not!
:silly:
