Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login

Is it ok to feel proud of your own achievements?

last reply
19 replies
1.2k views
0 watchers
0 likes
I think within life we all have things we could be proud of ourselves of achieving and have a feeling of accomplishment.
When I feel this way, I keep it very much to myself, I don’t like to tell others of my achievements as that could then be seen as bragging, that you have an arrogance.
This is so strange as it is not seen that way when other comment you and praise you for your successes, although in truth when this has happened to me and I get recognised for things I have done, I get very embarrassed when others comment.
I was at an awards ceremony the other day when I was put into the lime light and thanked for my achievement and had to go on stage and accept an award for my efforts, I felt so embarrassed and wanted the floor to open me up and swallow me. I do things because I want to it’s isn’t about recognition but its what, I enjoy to do.
I told my hubby how I felt and he said you should be proud, but I don’t see it as being proud about something.
I can feel proud of my children’s achievements and often tell family members of what my children are achieving, I remember once telling my mum of my son’s achievement in sport the fact he had been accepting at a district and London level within his sport as I was proud. My son after hearing said to me Mum why are you bragging to Nan.
So is it ok to feel proud of others achievements?
Is it seen as bragging to talk about our own achievements?
I dont see why you shouldnt be proud of your son. He is clearly a talented guy , why wouldnt you be proud?
And I dont think that anyone would begrudge you to be proud of yourself either. I think, for me at least, Bragging comes when I feel like an achievement is being used *against* me.
If you came up to me and started tell me how genuinely proud of yourself you were, I would be nothing but chuffed for you biggrin
What was the award for minxy?
To feel proud of your offsprings achievements is one of the most natural things there is and not something to be ashamed of...
There are some (you mostly see them on tv or in the local papers) who take this to another level and do appear to be a little over zealous but if they are proud of something why not let them shout it from the rooftops.....People will either listen or not...
To be proud of your own achievements is also not a bad thing and to talk about them to me shows an air of confidence but again if taken too far it can seem like bragging but its a personal thing as to how its viewed I suppose dunno
If your proud of something you or a member of your family or a friend has done then tell everyone :-)
Quote by Kaznkev
I would have died if I had to go in the spotlight too,totally understand that! redface
The only thing i brag about is my weight loss,11 pounds in 6 weeks,go me smile

Well done Kaznkev! losing weight is one of the hardest things in the world! especially when you have to change your lifestyle. You've done really well there :)
I love the spotlight :P I default to showing off surprisedops:
Pride in one's appearance or abilities is a virtuous pride, but pride as vanity is a vice. Well done Minxy kiss
Quote by Kaznkev
Well done you :cheers:
I think the difference is bragging is looking for others to validate you,put internal pride in yourself is a good thing.I used to have a very poor self image but now can say I am proud of my kids,the job Im doing raising them,where I am and who I is a healthy belief in myself.
I would have died if I had to go in the spotlight too,totally understand that! redface
The only thing i brag about is my weight loss,11 pounds in 6 weeks,go me smile

Kaz, these words ring true in my ear so few words with such meaning, "a healthy belief in myself" is exactly how I feel. I lacked confidence within myself for a long time, but have now in mid life found it and I must say it's a great feeling.
I don't feel arrogant, or the need to boast or the need for it to be noticed, just the fact I feel it, is good enough for me.
Wow! what a feel-good thread! biggrin
I think we have a lot to learn for our American cousins in the way they are happy to let you know about their successes and achievements
What's the point in hiding them?
Well done minxy, can't think of someone who is more deserving! smile
xx
Quote by The_third_man
I think we have a lot to learn for our American cousins in the way they are happy to let you know about their successes and achievements
What's the point in hiding them?
Well done minxy, can't think of someone who is more deserving! smile
xx

Thank you third kiss you are such a charmer lol
Great to see you back posting on the forums!
Feeling proud and bragging are definitely two different things, as are confidence and arrogance.
You should always feel proud of your achievements if they are a result of hard work or talent.
There are definitely times that I think you should blow your own trumpet too - for example in a job interview or application; who else will do it for you?
When people feel the need to preface every conversation or interaction with a litany of their achievements or experiences, then I would question what it is they are lacking in their lives to make them so boastful/needy.
But hey, we're all good at stuff - and so why shouldn't we (tastefully and appropriately, of course!) be proud of ourselves?!
wink
don`t know why but I always seems to feel proud of myself every time i get an erection.
I'm the other way I'm afraid, I am seldom proud of anything I do and entirely critical of almost everything.
It's the confidence thing I guess. Fear possibly too. I dunno. I daren't walk the dark path into my psyche to confront the demons within just yet.
It does make me strive to improve and learn, which is good, but it is an often cruel, double-edged sword.
I loathe bragging, simply because it is entirely subjective and often just a complete distortion of the truth. I feel if you have to list your achievements to try and qualify an argument or win a point, it means you are either a pretty poor debater or the argument you present is full of holes and not rigorous enough to withstand any objective scrutiny by your peers. Plus it makes you look a little sad, pathetic and somewhat self-absorbed. Technically called, an arse.
I can understand it in terms of CV's and job interviews however, that seems to be the standard nowadays. However I think there is a way to highlight the qualities you possess without coming across as a total, ego-driven, shallow, nob-end.
I think feeling pride in others is a magnificent thing, especially when it is fully deserved. I think misplaced pride as in "Little Timmy has been wonderful today! He only kicked the coffee table over twice and broke his sisters arm! Still it's an improvement!" is particularly bilious, but justifiable pride in someone else, even yourself is a good overstating the belief that this makes you somehow superior to others as a result, is pathetic, narrow minded and self-centred.
Good post Minxy, and well done on winning the Southern Section of the Bonkers of the Year Competition! ;-) biggrin
I have to say i am proud of things I have done but i just wont talk about them them to others - not even nixy - i just think its best to finish something and feel the 'I did that' thing and move on. I suppose thats a just me sort of thing smile
I don't see anything wrong with feeling a sense of achievement in whatever you do and sharing that with others. Sharing feelgood news such as weight loss, exam passes, promotion or just being loved up lifts your spirits and makes those around you feel good too biggrin
It's when people brag about what they have, what they do and who they do it with, is pure vanity and quite immature
Until recently I was convinced that if I could do something it can't be that clever but I admired immensly my sister's artistic ability for instance.
It took years of think sensibly about stuff to get more of a balanced view. There are things I do that others find hard (and that many find totally boring LOL) and things others do that I couldn't do in a month of Sundays.
But I do like to get praise, honestly who doesn't, just a little bit? A lot of that is to do with the fact that I put myslf down too much for all my life to trust my own judgment.
Quote by foxylady2209
Until recently I was convinced that if I could do something it can't be that clever but I admired immensly my sister's artistic ability for instance.
It took years of think sensibly about stuff to get more of a balanced view. There are things I do that others find hard (and that many find totally boring LOL) and things others do that I couldn't do in a month of Sundays.
But I do like to get praise, honestly who doesn't, just a little bit? A lot of that is to do with the fact that I put myslf down too much for all my life to trust my own judgment.

Great post Foxylady (I've always wanted to say that because it makes me feel like Jimi Hendrix)
My envy is directed at those who are artistic and musical. I've tried both and while I have moderate/awful success on the Music score, I am about as artistic as what cows leave in a field. I have absolutely no appreciation of things and I do not understand them at all. It's probably why when I hear Brian Sewell or Melvin Bragg I want to weep and flush their head down the lavatory, as opposed to listen to what great insights they can give. I have to be told what is beautiful in art. My appreciation is entirely logical, not emotional.