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Masturbation - IT'S WRONG!!!

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:wanker: = BAD
Seriously. Well, at least thats what some people think.
Don't believe me? take a look...
I've had to remove the link sorry but it's too offensive. - Jas
Shit this must make me public enemy number one.
rolleyes :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll:
I've only got half wa through it... and i am thinking either there is a punchline coming...
or these people are Wankers!
back off to read :shock:
Yes it is bad... VERY VERY BAD... smackbottom :smackbottom: :smackbottom: :smackbottom:
Thats what makes it so good... :twisted:
How about sending all those lovely people a link to this site, and say that we are directing them to Heaven? ( Read :small-print: down below )
That was a joke - if anyone does that I do not imagine that the Mods would be too impressed with the abuse that would follow. Do NOT do it, I am not going to.
Makes me glad I set the dog on them years ago! lol
McC
God that made me laugh... then I remembered some of the more fanatical Christians I have encountered in my time... who do actually believe all that stuff. Sounds like a good recepie for being seriously frustrated and messed up if you ask me.
I think the most amusing thing is the $3 billion lost by businesses every year from a lack of productivity due to masterbation.... I didn't think THAT many people did it at work (I know bluexxx does... ;) ) Doesn't factor in the $billions made from the porn industry, which is basicaly just a jiz facilitator. Makes me wonder if Americans in the bible belt have a quick choke at work in the morning.. before returning to the chaste and overly repressed wives?!?!?
Most of its a load of twaddle... but the evil of candles link is a hoot
Quote by wales_cple
Yes it is bad... VERY VERY BAD... smackbottom :smackbottom: :smackbottom: :smackbottom:
Thats what makes it so good... :twisted:

And after admiring your avatar I think i'm gonna go off and commit that very sin...
:rascal: :wanker:
Myth: But everyone's doing it!
Reality: Surveys have repeatedly shown that up to 5% of Americans don't Masturbate

Does this mean there is now scientific evidence to prove that 95% of Americans are wankers? bolt
3. Certain food. If we outlaw dildos and require that all sausages, cucumbers and carrots be sold pre-sliced, we will make it much easier for the women among us to resist the temptation to Masturbate.

Oh no!! How could I possibly masturbate if there wasn't a whole sausage to hand?? :shock: :shock:
Funny as.... rotflmao cheers :thumbup:
anyone even trys to take my vibs away and i`ll chop their DICK OFF.
sierra x x :rascal:
Quote by sierra
anyone even trys to take my vibs away and i`ll chop their DICK OFF.
sierra x x :rascal:

That's ok - it's obvious that they don't use theirs at all! lol rolleyes
WARNING !!!!
DO NOT LINK TO THAT SITE !!!!

Reading the linked site will cause your computer to go blind and grow hairy palms - honest! wink
Roger the Dragon
cool
Could make a fortune on illegal cucumber farming loon
Well I would have read it, but too much wanking has made me go blind :grin:
Quote by Angel Chat
3. Certain food. If we outlaw dildos and require that all sausages, cucumbers and carrots be sold pre-sliced, we will make it much easier for the women among us to resist the temptation to Masturbate.

bit of a flaw in their plan cos according to this
Reality: Experts estimate that there are at least 150,000 Americans masturbating RIGHT NOW! Masturbation costs American businesses at least $ billion in lost productivity every month!

they are too busy wanking to chop the veg.
I have a t-shirt that says... "Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten..."
Woooo hooooo, go ahead and wank to your hearts content, I bloody hate cats
:lol2:
Quote by bluexxx
I have a t-shirt that says... "Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten..."
Woooo hooooo, go ahead and wank to your hearts content, I bloody hate cats
:lol2:

:cry:
Stop wanking, I tell you!
I read a piece in a medical journal once that regular male masterbation greatly reduced the risk of testicular cancer.
and I don't want that so ............................ :thumbup:
"bluexxx" said
I have a t-shirt that says... "Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten..."
Woooo hooooo, go ahead and wank to your hearts content, I bloody hate cats!
Happycats said
:cry:
Stop wanking, I tell you!
I say...........which one of you wankers just killed my fecking cat????
evil :silly: :evil: :silly:
Cuddles xxxx
P.S. Don't know how to quote you lot in fancy ikkle boxes.........but I'm too tired to learn!! LOL
I read this thread, shortly afterwards went to bed and began to read my book (FemBernie - careful!)
Two pages in, I came to this quote:
"Masturbation is cheap, clean, convenient, and free from any possibility of wrongdoing - and you don't have to go home in the cold. But it's lonely."
I just had to get out of bed and post this - synchronicity, or what?
Quote by markz
I read a piece in a medical journal once that regular male masterbation greatly reduced the risk of testicular cancer.
and I don't want that so ............................ :thumbup:

Doing our bit to save the NHS money, and do we get any thanks ;)
Quote by tallnhairy
I read a piece in a medical journal once that regular male masterbation greatly reduced the risk of testicular cancer.
and I don't want that so ............................ :thumbup:

Doing our bit to save the NHS money, and do we get any thanks ;)
Yeah it was in the BMJ the other week - doctors are now trying to think of ways to tell their patients to wank more lol
Just seen a T-shirt on the way back from the post box:

"Sticks and stones may break my bones
but whips and chains excite me"

it was the wrong colour sad
Most of this stuff is known about in your link.
The main reason masturbation is stigmatised and subject to suppression in all ways, is that so far there is no way to tax it. or derive revenue from it.
sausages come in all shapes n sizes Angel surprised ...go on ....give us a clue .....
yours
dargento xxxxxxxxx
the link was removed before i had a chance to read the article that this thread is about but, i wonder what would happen to you if you did become completely chaste - i.e, not even any wanking?
my mother was a jehovah's witness and if you want crazy christian fundamentalist literal interpretations of the bible then they're your one-stop shop.
as i recall they even declare that wet dreams are your own fault and give some irresponsible advice on how to suppress them.
luckily when i grew up i realised what a bunch of gibberish it was before it did me any harm, but i wonder if there are any scientific studies that test what happens to men if they dont ejaculate for long periods of time?
it sounds like the kind of test the U.S. army would do for no particular reason.....or maybe i've been watching too many films ;)
what about women? do any ladies on here suffer ill effects from orgasm starvation?
don't get me started on door knocking bible bashers trying to force there views on you mad
Quote by wantonjames
the link was removed before i had a chance to read the article that this thread is about but, i wonder what would happen to you if you did become completely chaste - i.e, not even any wanking?

There is a belief that unused semen accumulates and becomes dangerous but this is a myth. If a man does not ejaculate for about a week, his body simply stops producing it until it is expelled or absorbed into the body.
Quote by Ice Pie
the link was removed before i had a chance to read the article that this thread is about but, i wonder what would happen to you if you did become completely chaste - i.e, not even any wanking?

There is a belief that unused semen accumulates and becomes dangerous but this is a myth. If a man does not ejaculate for about a week, his body simply stops producing it until it is expelled or absorbed into the body.
The quote this very fact on the site, Ice Pie. And when they outlaw masterbation, single men will be tested to see if they have been wanking or not by seeing if there is semen in the urine. If there isn't you either go to jail, or get all your property confiscated... :shock:
pm the link, I could do with a laugh sad