Inspired by watching the first half of Castaway on TV last night, by having the kind of job that requires very little mental input and by thinking the forum needs the odd meaty subject once in a while, I thought it may be interesting to pose a series of Moral Dilemmas to get you all thinking.
1) Imagine you are a castaway for six years. Against all the odd you manage to survive and are rescued. Now for the last six years you have sustained yourself with the thought that you will one day be reunited with your loved ones and all will be well again. However you find that you have been declared dead, your spouse has remarried and has a new child by their new partner, your own children are now much older and hardly remember you.
What would you do?
Try to rekindle the love you once had, knowing that you destroy a family in the process.
Demand to see your children even if they and the parents are reluctant.
Fight to recover your lost property and wealth, even though you know it will put pressure on the new family.
What exactly would you do if after all those years you were faced with the reality of a return to the real world?
Or maybe you would just walk away?
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Moral Dilemma (1)
Sexlightened
i would like to say i would just walk away....but then again, iv not been in them shoes, so i dunno!
but what i do know is that i would never jeopordise the happiness of MY family, regardless of the circumstances.
but what i do know is that i would never jeopordise the happiness of MY family, regardless of the circumstances.
a lot would also depend on the reaction from the *old life* family as well.....
... but after such a time, perhaps a balance could be found regarding the children, hopefully the would be no animosity between the previous partners....
but beyond that... probably a further period of time would be needed for all concerned to cometo terms with the current situation.
as regards recovering *wealth* etc... the book & film rights should make a pretty penny!
other than that...... walk away...
LP
... but after such a time, perhaps a balance could be found regarding the children, hopefully the would be no animosity between the previous partners....
but beyond that... probably a further period of time would be needed for all concerned to cometo terms with the current situation.
as regards recovering *wealth* etc... the book & film rights should make a pretty penny!
other than that...... walk away...
LP
Sex God
Probably walk away from the partner but try to have some involvement with my kids. Most likely not worry about the money or possessions, if I'd managed for years without them.
Sex God
Well, after I'd sued the shipping line for shipwrecking me (that's not too American is it?) I'd be wealthy.
I'd want to establish a relationship with my kids whatever.
I'd talk to my partner and her new partner and see how we all felt.
One moral dilemma would occur if I wanted her and she didn't want me. I think I'd give it up in that case - no point in beating yer head against a brickwall.
Another would be if she wanted to come back to me and so did I. The only vulnerablr party in that case would be their child. Difficult one - might depend on the child's age and what my partner wanted to do. I think i'd make a play for them to come to me as hard as i could.
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I'd want to establish a relationship with my kids whatever.
I'd talk to my partner and her new partner and see how we all felt.
One moral dilemma would occur if I wanted her and she didn't want me. I think I'd give it up in that case - no point in beating yer head against a brickwall.
Another would be if she wanted to come back to me and so did I. The only vulnerablr party in that case would be their child. Difficult one - might depend on the child's age and what my partner wanted to do. I think i'd make a play for them to come to me as hard as i could.
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Sex God
invite them all to my desert island
if i had lived for six yrs on it
it can`t be that bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
if i had lived for six yrs on it
it can`t be that bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I believe that I would be "in love" with the person that I had... not this new person.... and I am sure that they would have changed... obviously the history is what I would have clung onto when castaway.
So I would have to get to know them all over again... which I would, as I would of course still have rights to see my children. Whom I would most definately not walk away from.
If through this process they fell in love with the new me again and I fell in love with the new them... then we would have to discuss that.
I wouldn't be wrecking anything as everyone has choices... and what she does is down to her.... just as what I do is down to me.
splendid x
So I would have to get to know them all over again... which I would, as I would of course still have rights to see my children. Whom I would most definately not walk away from.
If through this process they fell in love with the new me again and I fell in love with the new them... then we would have to discuss that.
I wouldn't be wrecking anything as everyone has choices... and what she does is down to her.... just as what I do is down to me.
splendid x
:lol:Its not easy to imagine how it would actually feel like in real life. But assuming that the thought of your wife and kids probably kept you alive when you needed it most, it stands to reason you'd be fucked off to find they'd written you off.
But equallly having learned to live with harsher realities and the balance of life and death you'd probably be better equipped to deal with it.
But its more or less likely that you would be conditioned back into the real world again.
Otherwise you just might eat your rather tasty looking family..................... :shock:
But equallly having learned to live with harsher realities and the balance of life and death you'd probably be better equipped to deal with it.
But its more or less likely that you would be conditioned back into the real world again.
Otherwise you just might eat your rather tasty looking family..................... :shock:
I had an uncle who served in the navy in the last war. His ship was torpedoed. Some bodies were recovered . His was not. The worst thing apart from getting a telling you your son,husband is dead, was to be posted " Missing".and for a lot of families this is still true today. Thing was, 3 years later my uncle emerged from a Japaneese prison camp. He never told us much and nobody ever dared to ask. but he returned home and got on with his life although it was not the same life he had left, nor was he the same person as before. The one thing I remember about him was he never had any bitterness ( abet a refusal to be associated with anything from Japan for the rest of his life) even though his girl had married sombody else. He was glad she had found carried on with no regard for the past. He would say" live fully each day as it comes there may not be a tommorow and the past is done and you can't change that so forget it."
It’s interesting that most people would seem to be implying that although their children are important to them their partners are less so. Most people would be happy to have a relationship with their children and not their partners, provided they themselves had a profitable “deal†on a film and book.
If so, what would you choose as the best possible outcome from the following?
1, you return from the island, your previous partner returns to you destroying the family they had made in the mean time. However you get no substantial reward from any film or book deal, life is much as it was.
2, you return from the island, your partner stays with their new partner and your children don’t want to know you. However you make a truly huge fortune from the film and books.
3, you return from the island, your partner decides to stay with their new partner but is happy for you to have a relationship with your children. You make a small fortune from the film and books.
If so, what would you choose as the best possible outcome from the following?
1, you return from the island, your previous partner returns to you destroying the family they had made in the mean time. However you get no substantial reward from any film or book deal, life is much as it was.
2, you return from the island, your partner stays with their new partner and your children don’t want to know you. However you make a truly huge fortune from the film and books.
3, you return from the island, your partner decides to stay with their new partner but is happy for you to have a relationship with your children. You make a small fortune from the film and books.
Quote by Stormwalker
1, you return from the island, your previous partner returns to you destroying the family they had made in the mean time. However you get no substantial reward from any film or book deal, life is much as it was.
2, you return from the island, your partner stays with their new partner and your children don’t want to know you. However you make a truly huge fortune from the film and books.
3, you return from the island, your partner decides to stay with their new partner but is happy for you to have a relationship with your children. You make a small fortune from the film and books.
Option 1..... too much upset and pain for everyone and life hasn't changed.. altho' in my opinion things should have moved on in 7 years.
option 2. .... I don't get to see my kids and have no relationship with my former partner... the money is worthless in this situation
option 3 ... I get to have an amicable relationship with my partner a relationship with my kids and I get some money to ease the pain too....... this is the one that I go for.
splendid x
Sex God
Quote by Stormwalker
1, you return from the island, your previous partner returns to you destroying the family they had made in the mean time. However you get no substantial reward from any film or book deal, life is much as it was.
2, you return from the island, your partner stays with their new partner and your children don’t want to know you. However you make a truly huge fortune from the film and books.
3, you return from the island, your partner decides to stay with their new partner but is happy for you to have a relationship with your children. You make a small fortune from the film and books.
My ideal situation would be situation one providing that my partner returned to me because they still loved me and really wanted to be with me. I would never go all out to destroy their family so the move would have to come purely from my partners desires.
Love
FIRE xxx
Sex God
Make a fortune on the story, take the money and buy and island somewhere in the middle of nowhere and sort myself a place to live in, electricity, gas and running water.
After lving somewhere alone and quiet for six years, people would simply do my head in I reckon.
After lving somewhere alone and quiet for six years, people would simply do my head in I reckon.
I'd see how my husband felt about me and discuss it. I would not want to make him unhappy but would never be pushed out of my children's lives.
I'd understand why my huby got someone new but at the same time feel utterly desolate that he might prefer them to me.
Having said all that, people survive. I'd pick myself up, find a site like this and get out there meeting new people. I'd never be out of my kids lives though.
I'd understand why my huby got someone new but at the same time feel utterly desolate that he might prefer them to me.
Having said all that, people survive. I'd pick myself up, find a site like this and get out there meeting new people. I'd never be out of my kids lives though.
Quote by Stormwalker
It’s interesting that most people would seem to be implying that although their children are important to them their partners are less so. Most people would be happy to have a relationship with their children and not their partners, provided they themselves had a profitable “deal†on a film and book.
Deal or no deal, my partner has the maturity to have moved on and formed new relationships, it's not my place to destroy that .... I'd want to become friends with them both ... but in a good way ... after all they bring/brought up my children.
Partner and I migt not be compatible any more anyway!
My children on the other hand, would still be at the point where a relationship could be formed and cherished. Even if it's not as Mum/daughter/son .. I could still be part of their lives.
Quote by Stormwalker
3, you return from the island, your partner decides to stay with their new partner but is happy for you to have a relationship with your children. You make a small fortune from the film and books.
This seems the ideal :thumbup:
Cx
Quote by Calista
It’s interesting that most people would seem to be implying that although their children are important to them their partners are less so. Most people would be happy to have a relationship with their children and not their partners, provided they themselves had a profitable “deal†on a film and book.
Deal or no deal, my partner has the maturity to have moved on and formed new relationships, it's not my place to destroy that .... I'd want to become friends with them both ... but in a good way ... after all they bring/brought up my children.
Partner and I migt not be compatible any more anyway!
My children on the other hand, would still be at the point where a relationship could be formed and cherished. Even if it's not as Mum/daughter/son .. I could still be part of their lives.
Quote by Stormwalker
3, you return from the island, your partner decides to stay with their new partner but is happy for you to have a relationship with your children. You make a small fortune from the film and books.
This seems the ideal :thumbup:
Cx
You have put it so well. How came you love someone and then rip their lives apart.
