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More viewers than doer's....?

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Part of the idea of this swinging site, is to have oddles of contacts for us all to enjoy. However often we see more casual visitors than members. We also have LOADS of members who NEVER post and so forth never meet anyone. Like in ANYTHING in life, you have to be a GUNNA or a DOER. If you wanna have some fun, meet for sex and have a great time...enlist and post! We all started off with ONE post, and kind of got into the 'swing'...pun intended...? It wont kill you for heavens sake...another pun?
The right person may well be here right now, and if they posted, hey you have a great meet? AGAIN I ask for anyone shy or unsure to begin to ask if you really like the idea of sex with someone unihibited, and if so why not introduce yourself? I cant say from experience I have met anyone for sex on here YET, but I have had some bloody good laughs along the way.
So, if you want to meet people on a great site for gods sake join in! Be a doer NOT a gunna...the world is full of gunnas and they never get around to achieving much?
Absolutely!
I must admit that I lurked for ages before I dared to post, and now look at me :shock:
Go on folks, de-lurk lol
I didn`t lurk at all! biggrin
Now look at me!!!!!!!!!!
Venusxxx
What MANY do not see is that it cuts out the BOL-- LOCKS we all have to suffer in general life. On here I can flirt, be MYSELF, not the person everyone sees day to day. I have found some warmth, genuine funny/serious and good people on here, who can tolerate ALL that life offers. On here we can laugh about thinks we cant discuss in our normal lives, and find out things that puzzle us but we cant ask our friends or workmates? I remember a thread about anal sex and what was the best way to try and test it out? It is not about just ramming your dick in either guys? I kind of find it fun to be on here, but sometime I just wonder why many dont post or feel they join but dont join in? Some of the out and out idiots do get lampooned, but in all honesty many just ask for it!
I just think too it is great to flirt with maybe a woman who feels sexy and has feelings, but cannot express herself in the flesh, and I think guys too have this issue, and it helps them to come out more from within. So in effect this site offers MORE than SEX but a sort of relief therapy that helps those that need it to become more aware of their OWN needs.
SSsssssooooooo well said there Rocky,
We did lurk for a while but only for a week or two before we jumped in with four feet and never looked back,this place is the best lol
Clare and Stevex,xxx
wink
I prefer the idea that I'm taking a breather rather than being a viewer. It's more comforting, purely because you can fool yourself into thinking women do actually want to shag you once in a while!
Quote by rocky horror
Part of the idea of this swinging site, is to have oddles of contacts for us all to enjoy. However often we see more casual visitors than members. We also have LOADS of members who NEVER post and so forth never meet anyone. Like in ANYTHING in life, you have to be a GUNNA or a DOER. If you wanna have some fun, meet for sex and have a great time...enlist and post! We all started off with ONE post, and kind of got into the 'swing'...pun intended...? It wont kill you for heavens sake...another pun?
The right person may well be here right now, and if they posted, hey you have a great meet? AGAIN I ask for anyone shy or unsure to begin to ask if you really like the idea of sex with someone unihibited, and if so why not introduce yourself? I cant say from experience I have met anyone for sex on here YET, but I have had some bloody good laughs along the way.
So, if you want to meet people on a great site for gods sake join in! Be a doer NOT a gunna...the world is full of gunnas and they never get around to achieving much?

This is unfair in my opinion. There may be many people who are curious but shy, and need time to check us out before summoning the courage to dip their toes in. I think it is disrespectful to dismiss such people as under-achievers just because they might not be as outgoing as yourself, and I can well imagine that someone who could have been thinking about introducing themselves may just have been completely put off by your implication that there's something wrong with them just because they're not like you.
Maybe that's not what you meant to say, but that's how it reads.
Ice
Quote by Ice Pie
Part of the idea of this swinging site, is to have oddles of contacts for us all to enjoy. However often we see more casual visitors than members. We also have LOADS of members who NEVER post and so forth never meet anyone. Like in ANYTHING in life, you have to be a GUNNA or a DOER. If you wanna have some fun, meet for sex and have a great time...enlist and post! We all started off with ONE post, and kind of got into the 'swing'...pun intended...? It wont kill you for heavens sake...another pun?
The right person may well be here right now, and if they posted, hey you have a great meet? AGAIN I ask for anyone shy or unsure to begin to ask if you really like the idea of sex with someone unihibited, and if so why not introduce yourself? I cant say from experience I have met anyone for sex on here YET, but I have had some bloody good laughs along the way.
So, if you want to meet people on a great site for gods sake join in! Be a doer NOT a gunna...the world is full of gunnas and they never get around to achieving much?

This is unfair in my opinion. There may be many people who are curious but shy, and need time to check us out before summoning the courage to dip their toes in. I think it is disrespectful to dismiss such people as under-achievers just because they might not be as outgoing as yourself, and I can well imagine that someone who could have been thinking about introducing themselves may just have been completely put off by your implication that there's something wrong with them just because they're not like you.
Maybe that's not what you meant to say, but that's how it reads.
Ice
I agree with the both of you, but would like to offer this piece of advice to anyone just browsing and is too shy to post:-
1. You can use a unidentifiable user name so no one knows who you are;
2. You don't HAVE to put ANY personal information about yourself if your profile;
3. If you have ANY curiosities, would you not feel better knowing one way or the other?;
4. There are loads of people on here who have 'been there and done it' and can offer very helpful advice about a whole range of things;
5. You may meet Mr/Mrs right!!! but if you don't I'm sure that you will make loads of new friends.
6. If you don't try you'll never know!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hope this helps a little!
CA xxx
Well said Ice Pie.
I don't think posting in the forum or chatting in the chat room should be confused with actually going out there and playing. As part of a couple I play every week in clubs with more couples than I care to count but very rarely post in this forum and never in the Let's Meet Up forum - I just don't need to. I find the forums are an entertaining read although I don't often feel the urge to contribute...just as I don't write to newspapers.
However, I feel that I need to contribute to this thread.
You may not have intended it Rocky, but your post does seem a bit condescending. We are all in this game at our own level and for our own reasons. There is surely no right or wrong way to use this site so long as you don't offend other people. If people want to lurk in the forum then what is the problem? They will post, or not post, in their own time.
Meanwhile, all you posters carry on the good work and leave us lurkers alone. biggrin
Ric (and Jax)
I don't think there is anything wrong with lurking but I think Rocky was talking to those people that are too shy to post or too afraid to post.....
I was a bit nervous about posting but now I love it on here......and wouldn't even bother going to any other Swingers Website....
Am I totally active in terms of Swinging? no, not really....but getting there...and doing it at my own pace......and that is the important thing for me.
I agree with Helen about the (at your own pace bit). This swinging thing is definitely growing on me, but for me the thing that makes me keep logging on is the entertainment factor. I find this site so intersting I feel addicted to it. I wonder how many oyhers feel the same.
As a newcomer I have found it difficult to join in some of the threads as you all know each other so well. It is like a stranger being on the outside of a group of friends who all know the 'in' jokes.
If you check the threads you will notice that the majority of the chat is between probably no more than about two dozen people.
When you are part of a group of friends, it is difficult to understand how difficult it is for somebody else to become part of that group. Some of the humour is difficult to understand as it is so much linked to what has gone before.
Just an observation as a newbie. And I know it takes a while to become part of a group,
what can i say i just like lurking smile I might be tempted to post more if i could just get rid of this stinking cold sad Oh well am off to watch grub smith bet on a cock fight lol
Quote by TheFacilitator
As a newcomer I have found it difficult to join in some of the threads as you all know each other so well. It is like a stranger being on the outside of a group of friends who all know the 'in' jokes.
If you check the threads you will notice that the majority of the chat is between probably no more than about two dozen people.
When you are part of a group of friends, it is difficult to understand how difficult it is for somebody else to become part of that group. Some of the humour is difficult to understand as it is so much linked to what has gone before.
Just an observation as a newbie. And I know it takes a while to become part of a group,

I know what you mean Fac. It's quite difficult at first and you really do feel like an outsider, I know I did. I think the turning point for me personally was the last North West Munch. I was amazed by the warm reception I got from everyone, and I felt a real part of the group immediately.
I think the longer you stay here and the more you post, the more a part of the group you become. There are lots of people on here that I've never met, but that doesn't stop me from chatting to them in threads (I've never met you for example)
I think both Rocky and Ice have a point, but you are doing fine, and are not an outsider. Thats just a state of mind smile kiss
Quote by Angel Chat
As a newcomer I have found it difficult to join in some of the threads as you all know each other so well. It is like a stranger being on the outside of a group of friends who all know the 'in' jokes.
If you check the threads you will notice that the majority of the chat is between probably no more than about two dozen people.
When you are part of a group of friends, it is difficult to understand how difficult it is for somebody else to become part of that group. Some of the humour is difficult to understand as it is so much linked to what has gone before.
Just an observation as a newbie. And I know it takes a while to become part of a group,

I know what you mean Fac. It's quite difficult at first and you really do feel like an outsider, I know I did. I think the turning point for me personally was the last North West Munch. I was amazed by the warm reception I got from everyone, and I felt a real part of the group immediately.
I think the longer you stay here and the more you post, the more a part of the group you become. There are lots of people on here that I've never met, but that doesn't stop me from chatting to them in threads (I've never met you for example)
I think both Rocky and Ice have a point, but you are doing fine, and are not an outsider. Thats just a state of mind smile kiss
Same here. This place felt very cliquey when I first joined, but there was something about it that appealed to me (probably the women lol ), so I got stuck in. Time moves on and as you get known on the site you develop your own "in" jokes with others and before you realise it, you're one of the regulars.
Quote by easy
Same here. This place felt very cliquey when I first joined, but there was something about it that appealed to me (probably the women lol ), so I got stuck in. Time moves on and as you get known on the site you develop your own "in" jokes with others and before you realise it, you're one of the regulars.

Here speaks another that I've never met (not for want of trying) :cry: :lol:
Quote by Angel Chat
Same here. This place felt very cliquey when I first joined, but there was something about it that appealed to me (probably the women lol ), so I got stuck in. Time moves on and as you get known on the site you develop your own "in" jokes with others and before you realise it, you're one of the regulars.

Here speaks another that I've never met (not for want of trying) :cry: :lol:
Well you'll get to meet us at the Munch. Please try to be gentle with us. We're loosing our Munch cherry. :shock: redface :lol:
Quote by easy
Well you'll get to meet us at the Munch. Please try to be gentle with us. We're loosing our Munch cherry. :shock: redface lol

Did I tell you what happened to me at the last munch?? :twisted:
Quote by Angel Chat
Well you'll get to meet us at the Munch. Please try to be gentle with us. We're loosing our Munch cherry. :shock: redface lol

Did I tell you what happened to me at the last munch?? :twisted:
Am I going to need some Kleenex handy? :lol: :lol: :lol:
Quote by Angel Chat
I think both Rocky and Ice have a point, but you are doing fine, and are not an outsider. Thats just a state of mind smile kiss

Thanks Angel. :love:
I don't feel like an outsider, the vibes I've had have been very good. (That's the vibes I've got on here, not by playing with my wife's latest aquisition) (spelling?????) :welcome:
Maybe I ought to introduce myself properly lol
I'm Rich, and unfortunately that's my name, not my status. Only really been into this for about 6 months, but have had a great time. Wifey and I have tried lots of things but never a full swap yet. Maybe one day.
I think the munches must be the thing to do, but living in Bristol makes that difficult. So will probably give that a miss.
Anyway, thanks for the welcome and I'll look forward to being part of the in crowd soon. wink
Another newbie(ish) comment smile
I havent been posting on here for very long, Calista has been here a lot longer and had been drip feeding me with the humourous jems for a while. I go through phases of posting and watching myself so i fit both sides lol
I can agree with Fac about feeling at times like your on the outside looking in, but the attitudes and humour have made that less profound daily.
We think the munch is a good step forward and we are planning to attend to, so hopefully we will meet some new friends there and we will feel as welcome IRL as we do here :)
smile
Quote by corriefem
When I first came here in February I was scared to post expecially in the GFZ

And so you should be!!
Tchhh!! Women posting in the GFZ mad :x :x Pah !! Whatever next :doh: rolleyes :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: lol :lol: :lol: :lol:
Have now de-lurked biggrin Only my second post but I'm sure more will come. :D
I am a little shy but have to say from reading the posts that the peoplpe here do seem friendly. It's the same in any group I guess. If you don't the plunge you always will be on the outside looking in.
I'd be scared of you all with your history and in jokes, but I'm just too damn confident to care biggrin As a newbie (with my 5 or so posts) I don't feel like I know anyone here, but already this place has brought some fun to my hungover Sunday afternoon, maybe I just feel comfortable in the presence of highly sexually minded/motivated people. People seem welcoming here which all good too. And if anyone does want to have some fun I'm always open for a PM
I think everyone has made very valid points in this thread. The only one I didn't agree with is that shy people/lurkers are under achievers.
Personally i've been reading the forums on and off for the past few months and only decided to join today and try and join in with everyone else.
I must admit i'm a shy sort of guy but hopefully can get to know you all and have some fun on here as that's what life should be all about smile
smile
Quote by corriefem
I think everyone has made very valid points in this thread. The only one I didn't agree with is that shy people/lurkers are under achievers.

Cant believe that quote was meant in that way smile :) Being a very shy person in real life (dont say WHAT those who have met me I am), I am a high achiever making up for my shyness in social settings. I have got through shyness by acting - my world of work is my stage. So never worry about being shy celebrate it. Many famous people have been excrutionally shy. Now lurkers being under achievers well wont know that until they stop being lurkers lol. Maybe we need another poll very popular at the moment wink :wink:
Again a fairly high achiever here ... (not that I'm bragging) and whilst I come across as very confident online I do suffer terribly with shyness ... I can't approach anyone at all (unless it's business and then it's because I immediately have the upper hand).
I registered back in June but it took me almost a month to really get posting ...
Everyone is a newbie at some point in everything. Finding the right way to say what you mean is difficult without a book post. It was, and is to all who are possible on the verge of posting/joining in? I try to say hello to many and make them feel welcome as so many of you do to. It just breaks the ice. In jokes always run in any place and that is always hard to get into. I think I rove about the posts like many do and I have MANY friends and maybe a few who dont like my posts, but I keep on posting because I feel maybe in some ways it helps others to come out of the shadows. I am always game for a laugh and not always sane, but then I like to be myself!