I kind of have this distance thing going on at the moment, through text messages and phone calls because we can't see each other in the flesh at the moment.
His messages get really dirty, and we've had phone sex which consists of him talking dirty to me and me just kind of groaning.
I really really want to talk dirty to him and maybe send him some dirty messages to brighten his day, but I'm not sure what to say. I don't know what he'd like to hear. Does that sound stupid?
Anyway, my question is, what kind of things can I text / talk about that will really get him going. He apparantly likes really filthy sex, but what would you even define as filthy?
Any tips would be greatly appreciated.
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Problems with Dirty Talking
Hi,
We've done aliitle of this so maybe we can help.
Try to describe to him slowly and in detail what you would do with him if he was there in the flesh. Maybe write a few pointers down for the next time you chat on the phone. let you imagination run wild. Make it long and as graphic as possible. Have you got the ability to send pictures via mobile phone? If so then send him a few pics of you doing a strip maybe more graphic should you choose to.
Little snippets of text leading to the next text with a little time between each one, tease him.
As for the 'dirty sex' peoples definition of this varies vastly from person to person. With that in mind try to shock him, maybe say things that you have only talked about in fantasys. Read the Swingers stories on this very site, maybe the will give you some ideas.
Hope this helps alittle and good luck.
x
We've done aliitle of this so maybe we can help.
Try to describe to him slowly and in detail what you would do with him if he was there in the flesh. Maybe write a few pointers down for the next time you chat on the phone. let you imagination run wild. Make it long and as graphic as possible. Have you got the ability to send pictures via mobile phone? If so then send him a few pics of you doing a strip maybe more graphic should you choose to.
Little snippets of text leading to the next text with a little time between each one, tease him.
As for the 'dirty sex' peoples definition of this varies vastly from person to person. With that in mind try to shock him, maybe say things that you have only talked about in fantasys. Read the Swingers stories on this very site, maybe the will give you some ideas.
Hope this helps alittle and good luck.
x
Sex God
Quote by petal24
Anyway, my question is, what kind of things can I text / talk about that will really get him going. He apparantly likes really filthy sex, but what would you even define as filthy?
Any tips would be greatly appreciated.
Nope sorry, never done anything like that myself. Wouldn't know where to start
You could always just start with a text describing what you'd like done to you though
Sex God
We did try it, but mrs davej just can't spell and getting a text telling me to come home cos she wanted to 'cover me in pee nuts and butt yer' just didn't work.
I'm sure kiss will be along soon to demonstrate how it's done
A tip from me......most girls will appreciate the tantalising, descriptive approach.
Most guys will prefer it if you do a bit of the tantalising, descripive stuff- but then just say the dirtiest sweary words you can conjour up!
IMHO anyway!
A tip from me......most girls will appreciate the tantalising, descriptive approach.
Most guys will prefer it if you do a bit of the tantalising, descripive stuff- but then just say the dirtiest sweary words you can conjour up!
IMHO anyway!
I read the swinger stories, is it just me or are some of them a bit far fetched. In one, they are describing two girls, one apparantly size12 with 38J breasts and the other size 8 with 38H breasts. Unlike they had matching humongous boob jobs, how likely is that? Anyway, thats a bit off topic.
So far I've said a few dirty tigns which he responded well to, but I'm running out of thigns to say and I don't want to keep reusing the same old things and repeating myself. this is like every night, so I'm racking brains trying to think of things to say.
I saw him in his office the other day (same building as me but different company) and was going to text him saying i wanted to kneel in front of him etc, but thought he might think thats a bit stupid!
So far I've said a few dirty tigns which he responded well to, but I'm running out of thigns to say and I don't want to keep reusing the same old things and repeating myself. this is like every night, so I'm racking brains trying to think of things to say.
I saw him in his office the other day (same building as me but different company) and was going to text him saying i wanted to kneel in front of him etc, but thought he might think thats a bit stupid!
Quote by petal24
I read the swinger stories, is it just me or are some of them a bit far fetched. In one, they are describing two girls, one apparantly size12 with 38J breasts and the other size 8 with 38H breasts. Unlike they had matching humongous boob jobs, how likely is that? Anyway, thats a bit off topic.
So far I've said a few dirty tigns which he responded well to, but I'm running out of thigns to say and I don't want to keep reusing the same old things and repeating myself. this is like every night, so I'm racking brains trying to think of things to say.
I saw him in his office the other day (same building as me but different company) and was going to text him saying i wanted to kneel in front of him etc, but thought he might think thats a bit stupid!
Its not stupid at all. Send yourself off into a little fantasy world where you creep into his office and kneel under his desk to give him a blow job.....ending of course with him cumming hard down your throat, and you licking the spillage off your chin as you casually stand up & leave the office without uttering a word to him.
:thumbup:
Quote by winchwench
I'm sure kiss will be along soon to demonstrate how it's done
A tip from me......most girls will appreciate the tantalising, descriptive approach.
Most guys will prefer it if you do a bit of the tantalising, descripive stuff- but then just say the dirtiest sweary words you can conjour up!
IMHO anyway!
What a brilliant line Wenchy, I will store that one away for later! :giggle:
My advice would be start 'small' until you feel more comfortable. Maybe you could tell him what you really enjoyed when you were last together, or maybe what you would like to do if he was there with you.
From a personal perspective I think it's something that is very difficult to do if you aren't excited in the slightest. If you recall something sexual that you really enjoyed together you may feel sexier and therefore more able to talk dirty. For me, the more aroused I am the filthier my words become.
ops: :lol:But everyone is different so although he may love talking very dirty, it doesn't mean that a) you should automatically know how to do it or b) that you have to do it. I am sure he will appreciate you making the effort, but just do/say what you feel comfortable with.
I do get aroused, but I kind of freeze up because I'm so scared I'll say something and he'll laugh at me! But at the same time, I don't want to come across as a prude so I want to say something!
I worry about stuff way too much!
I did say to him, I haven't done this before and he said just close your eyes and use your imagiantion. But by that time I felt stupid.
I do have little fantasies about him, like little places in our building I'd take him etc, but in reality I'd never have the balls to do that (although he would) and he knows that, so I don't know if that'd come across well.
I worry about stuff way too much!
I did say to him, I haven't done this before and he said just close your eyes and use your imagiantion. But by that time I felt stupid.
I do have little fantasies about him, like little places in our building I'd take him etc, but in reality I'd never have the balls to do that (although he would) and he knows that, so I don't know if that'd come across well.
Sex God
I tried once and got all embarrassed and tongue tied.... Yes you know who you are ops:
Yes you know who you are ops: Believe it or not, up until a couple of years ago I was sexually repressed.
Yup, I had a lot of sex, but mostly for the wrong reasons. I was lacking the self confidence to "let go" and enjoy.
Learning to talk dirty is tough, and damn embarrasing! However, the more turned on you are- the easier it gets. If you're turned on- why not masturbate whilst you're telling him what you would like to do?
You get horny- he gets even hornier, win win situation!
It doesn't matter that you may never do the things youre fantasising about. Often, the fantasy is so much sexier than the reality anyway!
Some of the best sex we've ever had has been when we have fantasised about what I would do to another guy in particular. Even though the reality wasn't nearly as horny it didn't matter. The dirtier the fantasising got, the hotter the sex.
Something i've known for years but only just started to capitalise on is this.
80% Plus of sexual enjoyment comes from the brain, not the genitalia.
You'd soon get bored of shagging mr/miss page 3/adonis if they were dull in the sack!
Well I would anyway!
Mental stimulation keeps the sex sexy, rather than just a means to an end.
The ramblings of a bored, tired mind!
Yup, I had a lot of sex, but mostly for the wrong reasons. I was lacking the self confidence to "let go" and enjoy.
Learning to talk dirty is tough, and damn embarrasing! However, the more turned on you are- the easier it gets. If you're turned on- why not masturbate whilst you're telling him what you would like to do?
You get horny- he gets even hornier, win win situation!
It doesn't matter that you may never do the things youre fantasising about. Often, the fantasy is so much sexier than the reality anyway!
Some of the best sex we've ever had has been when we have fantasised about what I would do to another guy in particular. Even though the reality wasn't nearly as horny it didn't matter. The dirtier the fantasising got, the hotter the sex.
Something i've known for years but only just started to capitalise on is this.
80% Plus of sexual enjoyment comes from the brain, not the genitalia.
You'd soon get bored of shagging mr/miss page 3/adonis if they were dull in the sack!
Well I would anyway!
Mental stimulation keeps the sex sexy, rather than just a means to an end.
The ramblings of a bored, tired mind!
Sex God
dont know what all this is about cos i never done dirty txt
wouldnt know where to start
i agree with his lairdship
an if anyone says diferant !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
wouldnt know where to start
i agree with his lairdship
an if anyone says diferant !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sex God
I'm bumping this up, because I've been having a convo about dirty talk. I was looking for another thread and saw this.
Does dirty talk do it for you? Are there instances in which it is not good? What kind of 'dirty' do you like/not like?
For me, it's all about the voice. I love dirty talk but if the person chatting the filth has a 'wrong' voice, then it is a total turn off!
Does dirty talk do it for you? Are there instances in which it is not good? What kind of 'dirty' do you like/not like?
For me, it's all about the voice. I love dirty talk but if the person chatting the filth has a 'wrong' voice, then it is a total turn off!
:giggle: So glad the right and wrong voice thing isn't just me...
There was this guy who just completely ruined the moment by talking dirty in a voice just like Alan Bennett's. I mean - it was his natural voice, he wasnt doing an Alan Bennett impression on purpose. And it was suddenly as if Thora Hird were in the room with us doing a monologue ...
:giggle:
There was this guy who just completely ruined the moment by talking dirty in a voice just like Alan Bennett's. I mean - it was his natural voice, he wasnt doing an Alan Bennett impression on purpose. And it was suddenly as if Thora Hird were in the room with us doing a monologue ...
:giggle:
"Are you going to be daddy's little girl?!" WTF :shock:
No.. no...
No.. no...
No.. no...
No.. no...
No.. no...
No.. no...
Maybe dirty in HIS head but so very, very wrong in mine
The voice was right, the tone was right, the look was right, the cock was huge but the words (and motive?) weren't right at all :sad:
No.. no...
No.. no...
No.. no...
No.. no...
No.. no...
No.. no...
Maybe dirty in HIS head but so very, very wrong in mine
The voice was right, the tone was right, the look was right, the cock was huge but the words (and motive?) weren't right at all :sad: 
Sex God
Quote by noladreams
..........
For me, it's all about the voice. I love dirty talk but if the person chatting the filth has a 'wrong' voice, then it is a total turn off!
?
Sex God
Quote by splendid_
I don't do it. I can say cock and sometimes cunt. I also say cum I will say fuck too. I am getting better at putting it all together in a suggestive way but it is a struggle.
Cum's easy to say. C'mon splendid, spit it out. :giggle:
Sex God
Quote by TheLovelyOne
:giggle: So glad the right and wrong voice thing isn't just me...
There was this guy who just completely ruined the moment by talking dirty in a voice just like Alan Bennett's. I mean - it was his natural voice, he wasnt doing an Alan Bennett impression on purpose. And it was suddenly as if Thora Hird were in the room with us doing a monologue ...
:giggle:
Do you know Loveliest, I actually love you more and more!
I fear we would finish each other's sentences were we to meet! :giggle:
Sex God
Quote by TheLovelyOne
:giggle: So glad the right and wrong voice thing isn't just me...
There was this guy who just completely ruined the moment by talking dirty in a voice just like Alan Bennett's. I mean - it was his natural voice, he wasnt doing an Alan Bennett impression on purpose. And it was suddenly as if Thora Hird were in the room with us doing a monologue ...
:giggle:
Missed this one....
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Quote by easy
:giggle: So glad the right and wrong voice thing isn't just me...
There was this guy who just completely ruined the moment by talking dirty in a voice just like Alan Bennett's. I mean - it was his natural voice, he wasnt doing an Alan Bennett impression on purpose. And it was suddenly as if Thora Hird were in the room with us doing a monologue ...
:giggle:
Missed this one....
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:Hehe - that was pretty much my reaction at the time!
