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question about fancying people
Sex God
Quote by doctorg
oh well, that's it fucked it then!
Or not as the case maybe
Sex God
Quote by doctorg
this a a serious question...! I've met someone who has great chat, interesting and very saucy but I'm not sure i fancy her physically, can anyone remember if that's changed for them or am I just being a shallow male
If you are attracted to several things about her, go for it - she could become the best friend you ever had, a perfect soulmate. Physical attraction doesn't always count for a great deal, it can come and go, but if you like her and you think she likes you, tell her and follow it up.
Good luck,
Mike.
Orgasminator
Ive been a member of this site for quite some time now.. and well, sometimes i do wonder why people say some things, sorry im pretty sure i know why they say them, and im affraid mostly from males. Hey i maybe wrong, but for gods sake,
A guy wants to have fun with someone whos got a good personality but you dont find especially attractive. Oh please.
Not picking a fight here but for gods sake there has to be an attraction.
A guy wants to have fun with someone whos got a good personality but you dont find especially attractive. Oh please.
Not picking a fight here but for gods sake there has to be an attraction.
Quote by Wilki
Ive been a member of this site for quite some time now.. and well, sometimes i do wonder why people say some things,
Not picking a fight here but for gods sake there has to be an attraction.
there is an attraction, a big one, just have been more instantly physically attracted and I can't remember if that's changed much in previous relationships. Didn't think that was such a strange question, oh well.
Orgasminator
No my friend it was just a generalisation, ( if thats a word ) not directed at you, just some of the statements by guys ( that i think ) just try to be PC. and the bloody stupid thing is that im sure the majority of females and couples and guys for that matter see straight thru it.
But hey its just my opinion.
But hey its just my opinion.
You can meet up with someone who you think is absolutely gorgeous - but for some reason that spark isn't there 
You feel awkward with each other and the thought of taking things to a sexual level can leave you cold.
On the other hand, you could meet up with this person you don't find particularly attractive on first impressions, but the whole body language thing tells you that this is the most gorgeous person on the planet :shock: Instantly comfortable with each other etc.......... you may not lol, but you may
Can't you just arrange a sociable drink or something, then take it from there - as you've said, you get on well. The worst that can happen is you come away as friends? After all, it's noones fault if the sexual spark isn't there, it's just one of them things :dunno:
You feel awkward with each other and the thought of taking things to a sexual level can leave you cold.On the other hand, you could meet up with this person you don't find particularly attractive on first impressions, but the whole body language thing tells you that this is the most gorgeous person on the planet :shock: Instantly comfortable with each other etc.......... you may not lol, but you may
Can't you just arrange a sociable drink or something, then take it from there - as you've said, you get on well. The worst that can happen is you come away as friends? After all, it's noones fault if the sexual spark isn't there, it's just one of them things :dunno:
Quote by Wilki
No my friend it was just a generalisation, ( if thats a word ) not directed at you, just some of the statements by guys ( that i think ) just try to be PC. and the bloody stupid thing is that im sure the majority of females and couples and guys for that matter see straight thru it.
Ah ok, though I wasn't trying to be PC was seriously wondering what people's experience of physical attraction coming and going was, given that it's panning out to be more than just a one-nighter.
.
Orgasminator
Quote by Calista
Hey Wilki ... long time no see ... how the devil are you? And if that's you in your avatar why's it taken so long????
C x
Hi Carlista, yes its me, sorry ive been taking time out.. hmm.. but your friendly weatherman is back. just been out side and its started to spit..
. and being such a nice single male i totally deny the suggestion that i have given you the weather warnings because i find you damn sexy and your avater does things for me. :twisted: But getting back to the point. Sometimes ive sat here and read some of the things that have been posted and thought well. i dont really need to say......
Wilki thinks of a new advert.
?
?
?
Want a good personality, not bothered what you look like, but im such a nice guy, ill say just what i think you want me to say Im a good guy. honest, oh and not desperate.
Quote by MISSCHIEF
Can't you just arrange a sociable drink or something, then take it from there - as you've said, you get on well. The worst that can happen is you come away as friends? After all, it's noones fault if the sexual spark isn't there, it's just one of them things
Hi, Sorry to PM you, but I feel a bit embarrased putting it on the forum right now as I feel like I've been tarred with the tosser brush! I've met her already at a regular party, but though everything feels right just not had that crazy physical spark and guess I'm just a little dissappointed, and was hoping some people might say, yes if you get on fantastically then her not being your normal physical type (whatever that is) won't mean anything after a while.
maybe it's just being a newbie, guess the regulars have heard the same old stuff from a million people...hmm.
DrG x
Orgasminator
Quote by doctorg
Can't you just arrange a sociable drink or something, then take it from there - as you've said, you get on well. The worst that can happen is you come away as friends? After all, it's noones fault if the sexual spark isn't there, it's just one of them things
Hi, Sorry to PM you, but I feel a bit embarrased putting it on the forum right now as I feel like I've been tarred with the tosser brush! I've met her already at a regular party, but though everything feels right just not had that crazy physical spark and guess I'm just a little dissappointed, and was hoping some people might say, yes if you get on fantastically then her not being your normal physical type (whatever that is) won't mean anything after a while.
maybe it's just being a newbie, guess the regulars have heard the same old stuff from a million people...hmm.
DrG x
Listen Doc, i wasnt targeting you at all, go out there and enjoy yourself, you only get one chance at this life, personality does count, i was just putting my point of view that some guys on this site, and not just on this site, "IN MY OPINION" talk and type what they think people want to hear.
Quote by doctorg
Hi, Sorry to PM you, but I feel a bit embarrased putting it on the forum right now as I feel like I've been tarred with the tosser brush! I've met her already at a regular party, but though everything feels right just not had that crazy physical spark and guess I'm just a little dissappointed, and was hoping some people might say, yes if you get on fantastically then her not being your normal physical type (whatever that is) won't mean anything after a while.
maybe it's just being a newbie, guess the regulars have heard the same old stuff from a million people...hmm.
DrG x
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: Another lesson learned eh? How easy it is to accidently post in the open instead of PM :lol2:
Well good on you for not leading her on, not agreeing to do anything you weren't 100% comfortable with etc :thumbup:
Don't compromise yourself just because something isn't quite right, when it comes down to it, you're on here for you, for what you want out of it - not for other peoples sakes. So stick with it, you're a nice guy and will eventually find yourself in a swinging situation that you're more than happy with
8-) 8-) 
Quote by doctorg
this a a serious question...! I've met someone who has great chat, interesting and very saucy but I'm not sure i fancy her physically, can anyone remember if that's changed for them or am I just being a shallow male
Nope you are not shallow at all..... Attraction is something that is not just one thing.... Physical attraction is just part of the whole package.... I am great friends with a guy I used to work with and we are the same, we can bounce off each other with saucy comments and have interesting conversations, but I wouldn't want to go to bed with him....
Shireen
xxx
Quote by Shireen_Mids
this a a serious question...! I've met someone who has great chat, interesting and very saucy but I'm not sure i fancy her physically, can anyone remember if that's changed for them or am I just being a shallow male
Nope you are not shallow at all..... Attraction is something that is not just one thing.... Physical attraction is just part of the whole package.... I am great friends with a guy I used to work with and we are the same, we can bounce off each other with saucy comments and have interesting conversations, but I wouldn't want to go to bed with him....
Shireen
xxx
I agree with shireen. I don't think that you are being shallow! If the "whole" thing isn't there it isn't there. In this case it is becuase you are not physically attracted to her. In another case it could be becuase you are not mentally attracted to her.
Personally I think that just becuase you chat to someone and get to know them and like them through a swingers site (sorry - I am making an assumption here that you met her here), it doesn't have to mean that you are automatically going to jump into bed with them surely? At least I hope not - 'cos then i've got at least two single blokes and two straight women i need to stop being so damned chatty with, and stop liking so much
Quote by doctorg
I've met her already at a regular party, but though everything feels right just not had that crazy physical spark and guess I'm just a little dissappointed, and was hoping some people might say, yes if you get on fantastically then her not being your normal physical type (whatever that is) won't mean anything after a while.
maybe it's just being a newbie, guess the regulars have heard the same old stuff from a million people...hmm.
Personally I'd certainly give it a go. For me physical attraction can develop. The important thing for me would be that we get along together, & if she feels the same.... BRILLIANT :!:
Sex God
Physical attraction is part of the package. If it isn't there, then it's not a great package IMO. Likewise if the personality isn't there, the physical doesn't count for much. You wouldn't expect anyone to call you shallow if you were attracted to them physically but turned them down because you didn't find them attractive in other ways, so I don't really see why people should get uppity about this one aspect of attractiveness. I suspect there may be some political correctness at work here.
Cards on the table, if I don't find someone attractive physically, then I'm not going to get involved with them physically, any more than I would get emotionally involved with someone I didn't like on non-physical levels.
Cards on the table, if I don't find someone attractive physically, then I'm not going to get involved with them physically, any more than I would get emotionally involved with someone I didn't like on non-physical levels.
Quote by Ice Pie
Physical attraction is part of the package. If it isn't there, then it's not a great package IMO. Likewise if the personality isn't there, the physical doesn't count for much. You wouldn't expect anyone to call you shallow if you were attracted to them physically but turned them down because you didn't find them attractive in other ways, so I don't really see why people should get uppity about this one aspect of attractiveness. I suspect there may be some political correctness at work here.
Cards on the table, if I don't find someone attractive physically, then I'm not going to get involved with them physically, any more than I would get emotionally involved with someone I didn't like on non-physical levels.
I quite agree, if I don't find someone physically attractive then it is unlikely I would get involved intimately, I could find the same person hilarious but it still wouldn't cut it. Whilst a GSOH is high on my list, physical attraction is there as high as well.
C x
Quote by Ice Pie
Physical attraction is part of the package. If it isn't there, then it's not a great package IMO. Likewise if the personality isn't there, the physical doesn't count for much. You wouldn't expect anyone to call you shallow if you were attracted to them physically but turned them down because you didn't find them attractive in other ways, so I don't really see why people should get uppity about this one aspect of attractiveness. I suspect there may be some political correctness at work here.
Cards on the table, if I don't find someone attractive physically, then I'm not going to get involved with them physically, any more than I would get emotionally involved with someone I didn't like on non-physical levels.
Couldn't have put it better meself.
So didn't try.
Lb :smoke:
Sex God
Quote by Calista
a GSOH is high on my list
Gives Sensual Orgasmic Head?
Form a queue. :twisted:
