Replying to mail

26 Apr 2006

Surely if someone takes the time to read your ad and make a considered reply ( im not talking one liners or winks here) ie those that read your ad and profie and construct sentences, surely those people deserve the decency of a reply, even a no thank you?
Good manners cost nothing, but it would appear some people seem to think themselves above the need for common decency to others?
...not that im bitter or anything
thank-you.

26 Apr 2006

Us single males are some what of a majority and whilst its easy for us to reply to all PM's couples and single females get a cosiderable amount more. If they have recently floated an ad PM's have been know to come in at a rate of 1 every few seconds :shock:
Even with no ad or an old one they still get a constant stream of PM's so understandably its time cosuming to reply to all of them. Don't see a non reply as rude but more so a polite thanks but no thanks. smile

26 Apr 2006

There is one couple looking for single guys on this site repeatedly saying that they have lost previous replies. They ask anyone who has replied before to contact them again, promising to answer all. I have written to them three times - full individual replies with photo - not just "copy & paste" or "look at my profile" . All messages have been read but I have not yet received a single reply - not even a "**** off" Posting this sort of ad is just wasting genuine people's time.

26 Apr 2006

:sleeping:

26 Apr 2006

Quote by ukvoyeur
There is one couple looking for single guys on this site repeatedly saying that they have lost previous replies. They ask anyone who has replied before to contact them again, promising to answer all. I have written to them three times - full individual replies with photo - not just "copy & paste" or "look at my profile" . All messages have been read but I have not yet received a single reply - not even a "**** off" Posting this sort of ad is just wasting genuine people's time.

Maybe they lost them again dunno

:dunno:

26 Apr 2006

Quote by ukvoyeur
There is one couple looking for single guys on this site repeatedly saying that they have lost previous replies. They ask anyone who has replied before to contact them again, promising to answer all. I have written to them three times - full individual replies with photo - not just "copy & paste" or "look at my profile" . All messages have been read but I have not yet received a single reply - not even a "**** off" Posting this sort of ad is just wasting genuine people's time.

Yes, there are a heck of a lot of timewasters around (males, females and couples) but perhaps, if we are being realistic, you just aren't what they are looking for and, as others have said, with the amount of messages single women and couples get here it really isn't possible to reply to everyone.

26 Apr 2006

i think i will keep out of this after getting slaughtered last time..

26 Apr 2006

I am being realistic. Having been on the swinging scene for over 20 years, I am fully aware that couples and the elusive single females get inundated with replies from single guys. I am not, therefore, surprised when I answer an advert and hear nothing, even though I am most selective in choosing the ads I reply to (I don't want to waste my own and other people's time by replying to ads for which I know I am completely unsuitable).
My point was, why keep asking people who they are obviously not interested in to keep re-contacting them, promising to reply, when they obviously have no intention of doing so.

26 Apr 2006

Quote by ukvoyeur
I am being realistic. Having been on the swinging scene for over 20 years, I am fully aware that couples and the elusive single females get inundated with replies from single guys. I am not, therefore, surprised when I answer an advert and hear nothing, even though I am most selective in choosing the ads I reply to (I don't want to waste my own and other people's time by replying to ads for which I know I am completely unsuitable).
My point was, why keep asking people who they are obviously not interested in to keep re-contacting them, promising to reply, when they obviously have no intention of doing so.

We are guessing that there are, amongst those they are asking about, some they want to contact and others they don't..who knows people's reasons for what they do?

26 Apr 2006

I don't reply to mail to say thanks but no thanks, but then I've put that in my ad, so with luck I wont insult anyone. A lot of em aren't worth the virtual paper they're written on. I do reply if someone's gone to a lot of effort. But I've still not had much success, some e-mail ping-pong, then no-one shows up. Same old, same old.
It is disheartening when it happens, but look on it this way, it's they're loss. By law of averages someone will.
H.x

26 Apr 2006

Quote by H-x
I don't reply to mail to say thanks but no thanks, but then I've put that in my ad, so with luck I wont insult anyone. A lot of em aren't worth the virtual paper they're written on. I do reply if someone's gone to a lot of effort. But I've still not had much success, some e-mail ping-pong, then no-one shows up. Same old, same old.
It is disheartening when it happens, but look on it this way, it's they're loss. By law of averages someone will.
H.x

Agreed, all very annoying but, sadly, very true evil

26 Apr 2006

I only reply to pm's when someone has gone out of their way to write a lot and have tried to match themselves against my profile. The bottom line is though I have no ad, my profile doesn't have any of the tick boxes tick (for a reason) and it states clearly on my profile that I'm not looking at the moment.
If they want pm me for friendship then I'm happy to pm back however, if they clearly haven't read my ad or are just chancing their luck they get no reply.
Best one was last week it started!

Hi
Have read your ad ???? and your profile and I love your pictures I know you've said you're not looking at the moment but I'm really local to you and I'm sure you'll change your mind once you get to know me better! I note you're married and have quoted personal reasons for not swining but iof it's because he's not happy, rest assured I'm happy to ring him to put his mind at rest and if you don't want to tell him I can keep a secret ;)

It then broke down into him begging me for a shag!!!
rolleyes

:roll:
If you place an ad and don't respond then there are loads of reasons why. It isn't always down to ignorance.
Cx

26 Apr 2006

If we get replies to our ad from guys that do meet the criteria that I state then I will always reply to them. It does state in our ad that if they dont meet the criteria then they will receive no reply....
I am sick to death of guys that reply saying "I know you said but...." If I have stated that you must be blah blah then I mean it.... I have written a very specific list of requirements and I will not budge on them...

26 Apr 2006

We got a reply to our ad from a couple yesterday saying they really liked our profile, now the day before we had been in communication with them over a meet,talk about forgeting us that quickly.....we decided not to reply to the second PM saying "don't you remember we talked yesterday already?".......

26 Apr 2006

Quote by da69ve
We got a reply to our ad from a couple yesterday saying they really liked our profile, now the day before we had been in communication with them over a meet,talk about forgeting us that quickly.....we decided not to reply to the second PM saying "don't you remember we talked yesterday already?".......

There is a couple (though we suspect it's just a single male rolleyes

) who frequents the chatroom here and twice failed to turn up for meets with us (both times with really crappy excuses) The second time we told them (him?) to 'forget it'. Yet, every time we set up a Bristol chatroom they (he) reappears and still tries to make contact......how daft can you get? confused

:roll:

27 Apr 2006

Thank you those that have read this and bothered to reply!
I guess i just have higher standards/better manners then some, however that is something that i have noticed in life and not just on here. i just think its common curtesy to reply to the considered, well written ads (again i am not talking the winks and one liners) IF people have bothered to read and compose a reply to your OWN ad.
I understand the weight of mail some people get, but judging by the replys on here most are the "junk"type anyhow, so how hard can it be to say no thank you to the doz or so considered replies?
Also interesting is the amount of timewasters people seem to endure, just goes to show that you cant judge a book by its cover doesnt it? i wonder how many "genuine" people got binned? Makes me think why bother reading the ads at all, you may just as well take pot luck!

27 Apr 2006

Quote by stourbridgeswinger
Thank you those that have read this and bothered to reply!
I guess i just have higher standards/better manners then some, however that is something that i have noticed in life and not just on here. i just think its common curtesy to reply to the considered, well written ads (again i am not talking the winks and one liners) IF people have bothered to read and compose a reply to your OWN ad.
I understand the weight of mail some people get, but judging by the replys on here most are the "junk"type anyhow, so how hard can it be to say no thank you to the doz or so considered replies?
Also interesting is the amount of timewasters people seem to endure, just goes to show that you cant judge a book by its cover doesnt it? i wonder how many "genuine" people got binned? Makes me think why bother reading the ads at all, you may just as well take pot luck!

If somebody sends us a PM the first thing we do is look at their profile to see if we are compatible in the most basic sense. We would suggest that your profile, with it's rather dismissive one liner and no pics whatsoever, is not exactly interesting and enticing and we would certainly not reply to someone with such a profile. Just a thought......
Your ad also seems to imply that you think quite highly of yourself and only want the 'body beautiful' types to reply....not sure that helps either|? confused

27 Apr 2006

Thanks for pointing that out and i take your points on board, however this thread is about those people who cannot be bothered to reply to mail, even if its a simple "thanks, but no thanks" a group which you seem to suggest you fall into.
In addition, you suggest in earlier replies to this thread you dont have the greatest strike rate in picking out the genuine guys, nuff said

27 Apr 2006

Quote by stourbridgeswinger
If somebody sends us a PM the first thing we do is look at their profile to see if we are compatible in the most basic sense. We would suggest that your profile, with it's rather dismissive one liner and no pics whatsoever, is not exactly interesting and enticing and we would certainly not reply to someone with such a profile. Just a thought......
Your ad also seems to imply that you think quite highly of yourself and only want the 'body beautiful' types to reply....not sure that helps either|?

Thanks for pointing that out and i take your pints on board, however this thread is about those people who cannot be bothered to reply to mail, even if its a simple "thanks, but no thanks" a group which you seem to suggest you fall into.
In addition, you suggest in earlier replies to this thread you dont have the greatest strike rate in picking out the genuine guys, nuff said.

We were merely suggesting some reasons why people may not be replying to you, which is, quite clearly, what you asked rolleyes

We don't 'pick out' any guys out at all and have NEVER replied to an ad for a single guy or a couple. In fact, we do not even have an ad ourselves.
Some people have contacted us (all claiming to be couples) in the past and have arranged to meet, turning out to be timewasters, but we don't think you are doing yourself any favours by the sideswipe, merely showing your inexperience, as any 'longterm' swingers will tell you, this sort of thing does happen to everyone occasionally. :roll:

27 Apr 2006

We all have the same experiences - so if you're gonna take umbrage at people not replying then its probably best not to write - ' cos it will happen 95% of the time! The next 4% will tell you no thanks. Its the 1% that you meet and have fun with that makes it all worth while! Lets face it - we're on an open web site here so the chances that all 453,342 member (as of today!) are for real are pretty damn remote aren't they....
I had a meet at the weekend for the first time in about a year - and it was great! So keep trying......
Peter lol

27 Apr 2006

Quote by PeterBristol
We all have the same experiences - so if you're gonna take umbrage at people not replying then its probably best not to write - ' cos it will happen 95% of the time! The next 4% will tell you no thanks. Its the 1% that you meet and have fun with that makes it all worth while! Lets face it - we're on an open web site here so the chances that all 453,342 member (as of today!) are for real are pretty damn remote aren't they....
I had a meet at the weekend for the first time in about a year - and it was great! So keep trying......
Peter

Well said

27 Apr 2006

I dont know others, personaly every reply to an add i have allways read throught out the add, profile, lookt at the photos and tried to think if i was in their position would i like my self.
Well conclusion? the rate of reply on any type of MEETING up thing, either love, singles, swinging, ...... even face party hahaha.... the rate of replies for single guys i thin is arround 10 for 250 emails sent. that is really scary ......
my point is, i am respectufull for the other person, i read what they write, i put loads of efforts in replying......and yet nothing to come with that, not only on here everywhere!!!!
i trully think of those 453,354 members (as of today!) not more then 10% is real, if you divide that by the surface of england plus the personal preferences......either we start lowering our preferences or either we are never going to find somebody hahahaha
great site but not working for me. ciao

27 Apr 2006

Quote by italian4you
I dont know others, personaly every reply to an add i have allways read throught out the add, profile, lookt at the photos and tried to think if i was in their position would i like my self.
Well conclusion? the rate of reply on any type of MEETING up thing, either love, singles, swinging, ...... even face party hahaha.... the rate of replies for single guys i thin is arround 10 for 250 emails sent. that is really scary ......
my point is, i am respectufull for the other person, i read what they write, i put loads of efforts in replying......and yet nothing to come with that, not only on here everywhere!!!!
i trully think of those 453,354 members (as of today!) not more then 10% is real, if you divide that by the surface of england plus the personal preferences......either we start lowering our preferences or either we are never going to find somebody hahahaha
great site but not working for me. ciao

Sorry that things aren't working for you, as you are aware you are one of many, many single men on here which is always going to be a problem.
Looking at your profile we would suggest that the main thing going against you is your age. A lot of the couples here are (well) over thirty and many, including ourselves, have kids in their twenties and would, therefore, never arrange to meet anyone that age. Sadly that's the one thing that you cannot do anything about, all we can suggest is post here regularly and in the chat room, get yourself known (and trusted) and get yourself along to some clubs, socials etc so you are known personally.

27 Apr 2006

WOW........... i wasnt especting an anlysis of my profiel but thnak you hahaha ermm yes you ar spot on, my age is a big barier to overcome.......but mose managed to move a mountin because he was too much a lazy arse hahaha
seriuosly talking, thank you for analyzing my profile :rose: , (even if it wasnt required lol

) but i was trying to say most people on here are not real not because they dont reply......just becuse they are usually single males desperate for sex.......hahahaha

27 Apr 2006

Quote by italian4you
WOW........... i wasnt especting an anlysis of my profiel but thnak you hahaha ermm yes you ar spot on, my age is a big barier to overcome.......but mose managed to move a mountin because he was too much a lazy arse hahaha
seriuosly talking, thank you for analyzing my profile :rose: , (even if it wasnt required ) but i was trying to say most people on here are not real not because they dont reply......just becuse they are usually single males desperate for sex.......hahahaha

Just trying to help, we have both been swinging for many. many years (both as singles before we got together) so have a little experience biggrin

27 Apr 2006

this subject returns yet again..........
from my own personal point of view, i do get a good ratio of responses to my ad replies... more so it seems than other fellow single male members...
i always send a face pic
i always offer my phone number in principle, and will send it when and if i receive an interested response.
i never do a "one-liner" , prefering to write a legnthy reply describing myself, offering accomodation to the right people and telling them that id like to get to know the couple/single first and thereafter meet.
HOWEVER, i have noticed that when i have recieved replies from certain members, and started to correspond with them, the trail seems to go cold.... they dont reply to simple pm's and dont have the decency to even say the odd hello in reply to a friendly mail trying to take things further, even after theyve said they are interested.
ive decided that im now never going to meet these members as i doubt that theyd even turn up.... infact their lack of response tells me that they are just timewasters, ungenuine, and to be honest i dont think thet are the type of people id want to have in my house....i dont do ignorance.... and im not givin them the opportunity to have one of the best shag of their lives and the opportunity to meet a real stud with a comfy home in an unpressurised atmosphere if they cant treat me like a "pal".
if they think my PMs are pressurising them, they should realise that its me who was intending to do them a favour.... ffs, how many fellas on here can offer them what i can...especially when many ads want a genuine single male, with big cock, accomadation, respectful of boundaries, good looking, etc etc. ... after seeing how let down some people are when their expectatons arent met, i honestly dont answer adverts?LMU posts if i dont fully fit the criteria...ok. there might have been 1 or 2 until i realised that i shouldnt.
it just goes to show that a little common curtousey does cost..... or atleast having a lack of it does!!!!
RANT OVER

27 Apr 2006

Quote by DeeCee
this subject returns yet again..........
if they think my PMs are pressurising them, they should realise that its me who was intending to do them a favour.... ffs, how many fellas on here can offer them what i can...especially when many ads want a genuine single male, with big cock, accomadation, respectful of boundaries, good looking, etc etc. ...
RANT OVER

Personally we don't think we would respond to anyone who thought they were doing us a 'favour'....how arrogant can a person get? rolleyes

:roll: :roll:

27 Apr 2006

weve all seen these threads sooo,,,many times...and as weve stated before there are litrally not enough hours in the day to reply to everyone.......remeber a reply isnt just a quick yes or no.......we read the message.....be it shit or not...look at the profile........make an initail assumption about the cpl/ ......look through all of theyer details......then look at theyre advert/s,.......and then we have the task of deciding whether we think they are genuine or not? whether they will be a laff or not? whether the poor (because they ussually are) pictures really reflect the person/people in them......then if were still awake...we`l reply..........but only to the messages that include something about us from our advert/profile........there are alot of timewasters....moaners.....arseholes..that use this site.........we think the decent peeps off here are in the minority......and we just want to meet those people!....weve met people before...who have made us feel uncomfortable....and with no where to stay in a strange town.....it can be a scary experience.....we try to avoid at all costs.....we dont like being given abuse , which can happen..when you send someone a knock back.......why cant people just get on with it......if someone likes ya they`l bend over backwards to reply...................sorry about that rant..but sick of seeing this repeated thread all the time.......if youve made it too the bottom then i commend ya :thumbup:

Quote by stourbridgeswinger
Thanks for pointing that out and i take your points on board, however this thread is about those people who cannot be bothered to reply to mail, even if its a simple "thanks, but no thanks" a group which you seem to suggest you fall into.
In addition, you suggest in earlier replies to this thread you dont have the greatest strike rate in picking out the genuine guys, nuff said

27 Apr 2006

we agree......hear hear biggrin

Quote by DeeCee
this subject returns yet again..........
from my own personal point of view, i do get a good ratio of responses to my ad replies... more so it seems than other fellow single male members...
i always send a face pic
i always offer my phone number in principle, and will send it when and if i receive an interested response.
i never do a "one-liner" , prefering to write a legnthy reply describing myself, offering accomodation to the right people and telling them that id like to get to know the couple/single first and thereafter meet.
HOWEVER, i have noticed that when i have recieved replies from certain members, and started to correspond with them, the trail seems to go cold.... they dont reply to simple pm's and dont have the decency to even say the odd hello in reply to a friendly mail trying to take things further, even after theyve said they are interested.
ive decided that im now never going to meet these members as i doubt that theyd even turn up.... infact their lack of response tells me that they are just timewasters, ungenuine, and to be honest i dont think thet are the type of people id want to have in my house....i dont do ignorance.... and im not givin them the opportunity to have one of the best shag of their lives and the opportunity to meet a real stud with a comfy home in an unpressurised atmosphere if they cant treat me like a "pal".
if they think my PMs are pressurising them, they should realise that its me who was intending to do them a favour.... ffs, how many fellas on here can offer them what i can...especially when many ads want a genuine single male, with big cock, accomadation, respectful of boundaries, good looking, etc etc. ... after seeing how let down some people are when their expectatons arent met, i honestly dont answer adverts?LMU posts if i dont fully fit the criteria...ok. there might have been 1 or 2 until i realised that i shouldnt.
it just goes to show that a little common curtousey does cost..... or atleast having a lack of it does!!!!
RANT OVER

27 Apr 2006

Quote by quimninja2003
we agree......hear hear
bit arrogant tho pmsl :-D
this subject returns yet again..........
from my own personal point of view, i do get a good ratio of responses to my ad replies... more so it seems than other fellow single male members...
i always send a face pic
i always offer my phone number in principle, and will send it when and if i receive an interested response.
i never do a "one-liner" , prefering to write a legnthy reply describing myself, offering accomodation to the right people and telling them that id like to get to know the couple/single first and thereafter meet.
HOWEVER, i have noticed that when i have recieved replies from certain members, and started to correspond with them, the trail seems to go cold.... they dont reply to simple pm's and dont have the decency to even say the odd hello in reply to a friendly mail trying to take things further, even after theyve said they are interested.
ive decided that im now never going to meet these members as i doubt that theyd even turn up.... infact their lack of response tells me that they are just timewasters, ungenuine, and to be honest i dont think thet are the type of people id want to have in my house....i dont do ignorance.... and im not givin them the opportunity to have one of the best shag of their lives and the opportunity to meet a real stud with a comfy home in an unpressurised atmosphere if they cant treat me like a "pal".
if they think my PMs are pressurising them, they should realise that its me who was intending to do them a favour.... ffs, how many fellas on here can offer them what i can...especially when many ads want a genuine single male, with big cock, accomadation, respectful of boundaries, good looking, etc etc. ... after seeing how let down some people are when their expectatons arent met, i honestly dont answer adverts?LMU posts if i dont fully fit the criteria...ok. there might have been 1 or 2 until i realised that i shouldnt.
it just goes to show that a little common curtousey does cost..... or atleast having a lack of it does!!!!
RANT OVER