Sick and tired of this Single men thing

16 Jun 2005

All of you regulars reading this will probably agree with me when i say that we are not all bad, not all sad pathetic excuses of men. There are so many topics going around, so many people with an opinion, on how many single men can be sooo desperate and all that. Y'know, the types that come on here bitching and moaning about how they are not getting any from this site. Or the type of males saying something so out of line on the meet up forum.
I think we should brand these types of men a new name. Not just put it down to them being single because the majority of us up on the board are very much genuine and don't stoop to such a level. Try and get something up in the terminology section for these men, save us putting down most of the male population. Just i cannot think of anything that would sound right for these types of people. If you could all wrack those minds of yours and come up with something that sounds fitting whilst at the same time kind of abusive.
Maybe this will sink in with you all, become common slang here on the SH boards. Maybe this will sink down and have no replies, but then i can't say that i never tried ay. If its just a stupid idea your very welcom to pull my pants down and give me am good smackbottom

16 Jun 2005

Losers comes to mind :moon: :moon:

16 Jun 2005

I kinda like wanker, but then I'm not the most sensitive of people.

16 Jun 2005

If this was the sort of site that tolerated bad languange I would cal them fu**ing Ars**oles, but as it is a site of maturity and intelligenza, how about spoilers?

16 Jun 2005

I dont think it is a problem limited to this site either; I guess it is the same type of guys who are pests and dont understand the rules at dogging sites too.

16 Jun 2005

Quote by senneborn
I but as it is a site of maturity and intelligenza,

when the fuck did this happen and why didn't anyone tell me?

16 Jun 2005

Ooooo gawd, theres someone who thinks against it and im still sat here without a spanking :cry: One can but try.
Nah i do agree with you partially there. Just it gets put down to single men too often to mention, which also drag the rest of us through the dirt. I don't know if anyone else feels like that, but it does kinda. If someone were to come on and put up a post saying single women on here are sluts or something i'm sure you would be in the same position. Just my opinion is all, that and wanting a spanking.
The mentor thing, great idea on mals behalf, its something that may get overlooked by these types judging by their initial posts. I've put my name up for that, but alas, really don't want one now. After 4 days and no response have decided to mouth off and try and stand out in this very cheery croud. Do you think mentoring is needed? Maybe, maybe not. But the idea is great anyhow. It should come to most people as common sense though, which is quite sadening. O well, nevermind ay.

16 Jun 2005

Quote by davej
I but as it is a site of maturity and intelligenza,

when the fuck did this happen and why didn't anyone tell me?
You never hear us, it happens every time you take the SH exit
:giggle:

16 Jun 2005

Unfortuantly the web is full of complete no brain tossers who seem to gravitate towards dating and swinging sites. You see these guys in every pub / club in the land , you know the type standing against the bar or wall letching at all the ladies untill they're too drunk to barely stand then going over and trying to grope them , you know the ones that get angry when a sensible gall tells them to go and fuck themselves lol.
Me I much prefer being sober ( and for the lady i'm chatting to to be sober too ) if i'm meeting someone for the 1st time. Its important that you respect their boundaries and how can you do that when you've drunk enough booze to sink the titanic lol. If I know the lady i'm seeing then by all means i'll have a damn good dram ( i'm Scottish FFS lololol ) and laugh before home and fun lol.
I've been brought up the highland way , treat others as you want them to treat you , No MEANS NO ( even if your in bed and started shagging stop means stop and no means no , ladies are fully entitled to change their minds and not be forced ) and that if you dont respect yourself then you'll never be respected by anyone else.
Just my 2p's worth , but I wonder sometimes if the government uses the internet as a form of care in the community with all the numpties on the go just now lol.
Davie cool

16 Jun 2005

There is a fair bit of male bashing these days. For a variety of reasons.
Because of the swinging character of the site it may appear there is a shortcut to 'heaven'. This may occur once a meeting has beem arranged but until then its no different from the swings and roundabouts of conventional dating.
But there doesn't seem much point in renaming the condition of single guys, as the situation will always exist.

16 Jun 2005

Quote by Mikehboy19
All of you regulars reading this will probably agree with me when i say that we are not all bad, not all sad pathetic excuses of men. There are so many topics going around, so many people with an opinion, on how many single men can be sooo desperate and all that. Y'know, the types that come on here bitching and moaning about how they are not getting any from this site. Or the type of males saying something so out of line on the meet up forum.
I think we should brand these types of men a new name. Not just put it down to them being single because the majority of us up on the board are very much genuine and don't stoop to such a level. Try and get something up in the terminology section for these men, save us putting down most of the male population. Just i cannot think of anything that would sound right for these types of people. If you could all wrack those minds of yours and come up with something that sounds fitting whilst at the same time kind of abusive.
Maybe this will sink in with you all, become common slang here on the SH boards. Maybe this will sink down and have no replies, but then i can't say that i never tried ay. If its just a stupid idea your very welcom to pull my pants down and give me am good

I guess their little eyes light up when they see a swinging site and assume it's full of sex starved nymphos rather than the same people you could meet in the street.
You could look on the bright side, does give the guys who show a bit of consideration a chance to shine :P

16 Jun 2005

Quote by Sexysteph
So you want a spanking hey?
ok Bend over

Could be fun
Steph

I ache for the touch of your lips dear,
but much more for the touch of your whip dear.
You can raise welts like nobody else,
as we dance to the masochism tango .
Fred

16 Jun 2005

Quote by Libra+Love
I but as it is a site of maturity and intelligenza,

when the fuck did this happen and why didn't anyone tell me?
You never hear us, it happens every time you take the SH exit
:giggle:
harsh but true libra....harsh but true.

16 Jun 2005

we single guys are branded tossers simply becoz people think theres something wrong with a guy that has no partner either weve been part of a couple as 9 out of 10 guys have the relationship went sour and the guys the blame we single guys arent tossers most have jus simply had a taste of the BALL and Chain (and i know im gunna pay for that) and found tha it wasnt daring or exciting enough single guys after that bit more should be branded heroes for wanting to take on such duties as pleasing another mans wife either sexually or romanticly. Be daring take life by the horns do wot pleases you people will always have there opinions and u cant change it and why should you care we know who we are and we know wot we are worth
see ya down the pub and mines a pint lol
:twisted:

16 Jun 2005

Hiya Jlaw,
Still working on those girls for you mate. wink

Mike,
The individual posts on here mearly reflect the individual opinions of the posters. Those opinions are generally based on what occurs within the site, and within the swinging world in general.
It is not that people think that single blokes are tossers. It is that the chances of meeting a single bloke, and that bloke acting like a tosser, are considered to be higher than with other groups of people.
This being the case, many people choose not to take that risk and don't involve single blokes in their swinging.
lhk
Kat

16 Jun 2005

And wot of the poor single guy thats not single threw any choice of his own is this guy also to be branded a tossa i myself think that either single coupled gay or straight no person should be judged and branded like cattle just coz 1 single guys a tossa deos that make the next single guy a tossa naaaaaaaa i myself am a TOSSA lol

16 Jun 2005

Quote by jlaw74
we single guys are branded tossers simply becoz people think theres something wrong with a guy that has no partner ...
:twisted:

Well maybe. But it's more their behavious on the site. The tossers I mean. In the past I have always leapt to the defence of the single guys cos they're great.
HOWEVER.... I have only just, and for the first time, placed an ad. It was a very specific ad. I was looking for two very specific criteria which I won't mention here because that may re-awaken another old debate. Over two days I got 21 replies. 2 - I say again - TWO and only TWO met those criteria. That's less than 1%. 6 partly did and the rest were just trying it on sometimes in a fairly offensive manner. "i love to fuck older pussy" is never ever gonna work with me.
Having always stuck to The Forum I have never before seen this other side. I think we should have a label but I think 'tossers' works.
Jezzay.

16 Jun 2005

Quote by KitKat
the chances of meeting a single bloke, and that bloke acting like a tosser, are considered to be higher than with other groups of people.

The first; yes, of course. But the second? If you pick ten random single blokes and ten random married blokes and ten random women, will there really be more tossers in the single bloke category?

16 Jun 2005

Gunna let my macho side down a bit now but yeh if i was a women and appreaoched by a guy and even as a guy and approached by a woman that said let me fuck you now ide be a little put off theres people u can pay for that kind of thing this swinging and meeting should make sex a more exciting fun and daring not just a fuck

16 Jun 2005

Quote by roger743
the chances of meeting a single bloke, and that bloke acting like a tosser, are considered to be higher than with other groups of people.

The first; yes, of course. But the second? If you pick ten random single blokes and ten random married blokes and ten random women, will there really be more tossers in the single bloke category?
Depends what they're tossing wink

good nite

16 Jun 2005

Gunna let my macho side down a bit now but yeh if i was a women and appreaoched by a guy and even as a guy and approached by a woman that said let me fuck you now ide be a little put off theres people u can pay for that kind of thing this swinging and meeting should make sex a more exciting fun and daring not just a fuck

What you're talking about there though is the expectations society encourages us to hold about sex. We're all "indoctrinated" with the "correct" attitudes in so many ways - films, movies, jokes, music, porn... they all tell us what the "proper" relationship between a man and a woman is supposed to comprise, and if we're not careful we can easily come to believe it and even strive for it.

16 Jun 2005

all couples beware as one day u youreself might become the single tossa so dont judge us too harshly

16 Jun 2005

Quote by roger743
If you pick ten random single blokes and ten random married blokes and ten random women, will there really be more tossers in the single bloke category?

Statistically and among the public in general possibly not. But our sample here on SH is skewed.
The couples are here for the swinging and will probably have an average tosser ratio.
The single ladies are - I have to make a generalisation here - unusual in that they have recognised and been honest about their own desires. It takes much more courage to join a site like this than a regular dating site and most will have put in a lot of thought. So I reckon possibly less than average tosser ratio.
The single guys - we already acknowledge that sites like this are going to attract lots of male tossers and ignorent youths. They are hardly going to join www. hoping for a quick shag now are they? (I made that site up by the way. Don't you go bothering those nice people at Google.) And so much higher than average tosser ratio I maintain.
But that just makes it all the more pleasurable when we meet all you lovely non-tosser single guys biggrin

Jezzay.

16 Jun 2005

Quote by roger743
and if we're not careful we can easily come to believe it and even strive for it.

Maybe that's a good definition of those attributed the 'tosser' label? Someone who is intent on striving for something just to please themselves with little regard for what the other might be looking for or get out of it.
My humble opinion is it seems very obvious when somebody is just trawling for a quickie to satisfy their urges, and does anyone want to have anything to do with someone who is purely selfish. At least if someone makes an effort to say what they have to offer another, apart from just a good seeing to, then they will succeed more?
Even with 'nsa' experiences, there are 2 people looking to find some happiness and pleasure (er...well.....em.... at least 2 !!)
David (able to offer!!!!) rolleyes

16 Jun 2005

Quote by roger743
The first; yes, of course. But the second? If you pick ten random single blokes and ten random married blokes and ten random women, will there really be more tossers in the single bloke category?

Sorry Roger,, but as a single bloke I'd have to say yes to this, and my job means that I meet every type, but I'm afraid that the single blokes do tend to have more tossers on a pro rata basis.
My attitude to all this is that I am here to enjoy myself, to have fun and to socialise. Anything else is a bonus.
John
smile

16 Jun 2005

Quote by jezzay
Statistically and among the public in general possibly not. But our sample here on SH is skewed.

Maybe; I'm not 100% convinced about that. But what I'm getting at is the sample that forces its unwanted attentions into your mailbox is definately very skewed - if you got 21 unpleasant replies to your ad then that leaves 7,328 (on current figures from the "men seeking women" ads) single guys who didn't send you an unpleasant email. You might only see the "tossers" but it doesn't automatically follow that they're in the majority.

Quote by jezzay
The single ladies are - I have to make a generalisation here - unusual in that they have recognised and been honest about their own desires.

To be honest, I can only go from the photo ads I've read and the (very few) replies to my ad I received from single ladies, but I have to disagree. Many women I've seen promoting themselves on this site and others like it - and here I play amateur psychiatrist - give the impression that they're looking for sex to solve other problems in their life - money troubles, job frustrations, kids, a husband that regularly pounds the crap out of them, whatever. I have seen ads placed by women which I read and thought "hey, she's really put a lot of thought into this and knows what she wants", but I have to say they're in the overwhelming minority. (No replies to my ad gave me that impression.)

16 Jun 2005

It is not about judgements, or about generalisations.
Each person makes a choice about who they want to swing with. They make that choice based on their experiences.
When Kit and I first arrived on here, we were very open about only swinging with single men, and actively encouraged single blokes to contact us. During that time, many single men took the opportunity, and some acted like tossers. Eventually, these tossers became such a pain that it affected our enjoyment. So we stopped.
Yes, the tossers are a minority, but a large enough minority to make us actively make ourselves less approachable to single men. Since we have done that, the tossers have stopped contacting us and we are enjoying our swinging again.
We do not swing as a public service to give single blokes a shag. We swing for our own personal enjoyment.
Kat

16 Jun 2005

Quote by KitKat
It is not about judgements

Don't be silly, of course it's about judgement. It's about judging once and for all that single blokes are the best of the best, la creme de la creme, and will float like angels to the delights of heaven, whilst all the couples and single women are heartless using hellspawn and will burn forever for their crimes against us.
...
Just a minute, that means heaven... will be filled with... single guys... and all the women will be unreachable in hell.
That doesn't sound so good.
Do you think hell might have a day-release programme?

16 Jun 2005

I got angry about this thread and just hurt my leg trying to kick my way through a biscuit tin.
Scary. :scared:
Being a single guy is kinda like suporting Tottenham. You know that whatever happens, you'll always be overshadowed by your more fashionable coisons from across the road.

16 Jun 2005

Why complain about all the single guys who give the demographic a bad name when you can show the ladies you're not one of them and get the advantage?
To give an analogy, it's like supporting Chelsea but complaining the rest of the Premiership teams are crap. All the single morons do is give the genuine guys a boost by shooting themselves in the foot, while the genuine ones find themselves few and far between, thus evening out the ratio of single guys to any other group.
The only thing you can accomplish by complaining about them more than once is to be classed as a single guy who complains about other single guys when they could be capitalising on the obvious advantage given by being literate, well-mannered and respectful.