Snotty PM''s

2 Aug 2007

ooooooohhhhhhh am so miffed this morning....just come on site and found I had a new pm.......I was dead excited cos I love getting messages, until I read it.
It was from a guy who was whispering us in the chatrooms last night when we were on cam, accusing us of ignoring him and saying that if we found it hard to find genuine people on the site we should 'look within' because we didnt ask him round for some after midnight fun.
Sometimes we get loads and loads of whispers in chat, and its hard to keep up with them all, and I dont think that the people who whisper realise that you will be getting whispers from loads of others at the same time. Give me the forums any time lol

We had to go off the site suddenly last night due to one of the kids choosing to be ill, and spent the night repeatedly changing pukey sheets.
So you can see why I am annoyed this morning......
I am too nice, and apologised and explained fully what had happened.....Mr Bone said that I shouldnt have to explain, and he said his reply would have been considerably shorter :lol:
does or has anyone else received pm's like this, or is it just us........and if you have, what did you do......
(if this isnt in the right place, please just shove it where it needs to be, ta smile

)

2 Aug 2007

Well, just goes to show that the guy isn,t worth bothering with eh? An no, a long explanation wasn,t needed, but as your so nice you did! :smile:
Sorry you had that experience!!
Ive had a few pm's...mainly saying *FFS what you doing on this site, if you dont want sex* I got upset by it at first but soon came to realise that it isn't my problem... its theirs!
Anyway...understand why your feeling miffed about it though, write it off to one of those experiences you have sometimes!
xanaisx smile

:)

2 Aug 2007

XX mwah XX thanks anais.......youve made me feel a bit better smile

2 Aug 2007

I think this thread makes good point, not because I want to see anyone named and shamed or encourage others to name and shame, but to take a step back and actually admire the way that you responded to the message. You could have sent a similar message back, but to diffuse it straight away, I must respect the approach.

2 Aug 2007

If I receive snotty pm's I simply forward them to admin and let him deal with the member in question in the prescribed manner..
People shouldnt have to put up with abuse either in the forums,chat or via pm.

2 Aug 2007

thanks very much for your replies guys, you have made me feel a whole heap better about myself smile

2 Aug 2007

I got a snotty reply to a mail i sent to somebody the other day. He had mailed me after seeing my advert but he wasn't my type, so i mailed him back saying "thanks but no thanks" and got the reply of...
"I was just thinking that MYSELF"!!!

I guess some people just can't take rejection!!

3 Aug 2007

Dont get me going on this subject mad

. It happened to me quite some time ago now. I got what seemed like an ordinary PM from a guy and I replied with a polite, thanks but no thanks.I then got a really horrible PM from him. I replied, saying I was sorry he felt like that or something similar, was a while ago and I forget exactly how it all went now but I do know shortly after the exchange of PM's I logged onto the site to find myself banned! :x Apparently, he had put in some sort of complaint against me. I was totally shocked at the time but it was investigated and Im still here and he isnt. Now when I get a PM, I respond appropriatley and if the other party dont like it and respond with a 'snotty' PM I ignore it, simple as that really. Its really not worth the hassle smile

3 Aug 2007

I think this is the saddest thing about internet chat which otherwise I find is great fun. But here or on dating sites and others ignoring a message is the easiest and safest way of saying 'no'. Any answer such as 'thanks but no thanks' or 'sorry, not my type' seems only to provoke a sarcastic or argumentative reaction.
A dating site that I tried for a time had a range of stock answers, a bit like the wink here, that included 'ages too dissimilar', 'live too far away', 'just found a partner' etc. I have found that getting one of these was at least better than being ignored.
Having said that there is always the shining exception such as the one I have just received from a young lady who caught my eye. In politely saying no she explained, 'It's seems very rude to say so, but you are a bit too old for me' ... which, of course, prompted me to reply and agree with her, and congratulate her on her honesty and wish her well.
smile

3 Aug 2007

Quote by anais
Ive had a few pm's...mainly saying *FFS what you doing on this site, if you dont want sex* I got upset by it at first but soon came to realise that it isn't my problem... its theirs!

Same here - If I don't want to start having 'cyber sex' right there & then or if I'd like time before meeting up! It seems to irritate some men.
One called me selfish and annoying! (just yesterday actually)

3 Aug 2007

You shouldn't be having to explain yourself to him or to anyone else, no means no and if he finds it hard to deal with .. tough he shouldn't have been whispering you anyway.
The odd time I go into a chatroom if I'm in the mood I'll talk to whisperers (I have nothing against them as such) but there are times when I simply cannot be bothered and that's my perogative.
Grrrr him PM'ing you and especially when you have a child who is ill has rattled me this morning! evil

3 Aug 2007

we go to rooms in chat that says no whispering unless u ask first n if thay whisper without asking we just don`t answered
if they are very rude we just cut n past and others will ask them to behave
if all ells fails post it to a mod////

3 Aug 2007

I must be lucky Anais as no one has sent me snotty emails about me not wanting sex but its early days yet........... I have had one or two strange ones and once upon a time I would have spent ages thinking of strange things in response. Now I use the delete buttom as my time is too precious.
Mrs Bone Digger you are far too polite - dont make their day by replying - make your day by deleting lol

:lol:
Corrie xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

3 Aug 2007

I agree.
I think perhaps we start off thinking we should put together some sort of reply to every message we receive and then eventually realise that not every PM actually deserves a reponse.
I hope your child is recovered Mrs Bone.

3 Aug 2007

I too agree with admin...
Your approach was admirable to say the least and I'm quite envious at your patients
I would have still told em to fook off mind! :P
Mike x

3 Aug 2007

thanks everyone, your lovely comments are much appreciated.
and yes child number 4 is very much recovered thank you smile

3 Aug 2007

Got my one and only snotty text a few weeks back.A guy from the site had sent me the usual wanna shag oneliner pm.
An hour later another pm telling me how rude i was not to reply to his pm after all it would be so handy for me as he lived in the same area as myself but i was now gonna miss out on his company for being another typical timewaster on this site :shock:
If he`d only looked at his sent box he would`ve known i had`nt picked up his origional message .
Was left rather stunned reading both messages at the same time .I always try to respond to all mail , spent ages trying to think up a suitable sarcastic reply but just got more pissed off so i answerd with a simple ok wink

glad your wee one is much better bonedigger x

4 Aug 2007

bonediger , sorry you faced the arrogance of a certain member and glad your ikkle one is better now.
i think weve all experienced this over the years.
one guy messaged me about 5 times while i was off line, saying how stunning i was on cam earlier, how he love to meet me, blah blah, i logged in saw all the messages, checked out his profie, adds etc, realised he wasnt the one for me,
messaged him a lovely emaik thanking him for his lovely comments and the 5 emais and explained i hadnt replyed sooner as i was off line and thank you but no thank you.
got a email back, " oh only just read your profile didnt read you were a fat fucking old bitch, wouldnt fuck you if you begged"
lol i replyed again saying thankyou for you lovely last email, so glad you showed your true colours now and confirmed my amazing ability of female intuition of not meeting prats.
xxx fem xx

4 Aug 2007

Quote by twos_company
we go to rooms in chat that says no whispering unless u ask first n if thay whisper without asking we just don`t answered
if they are very rude we just cut n past and others will ask them to behave
if all ells fails post it to a mod////

next time you whisper me without my permission twos I will send your comments to a mod! :giggle:
But back to the topic....
Even I have had the odd snotty pm accusing me of ignoring someone being elitist or downright rude! redface

The plain & simple fact is...
You cannot chat to everybody at the same time!
twos_company will agree with me that the chat in 'our' room flows thick & fast with tongue in cheek insults & piss taking flying back n forth...
Its bloody hard to keep up... sometimes anyone comming into the room will wonder what the hell is going on!
They will try to say hello to me but I may have my eyes off the screen trying to write a funny reply to someone who wants to tear me up!
by the time I have posted my reply the comments from person who tried to say hello to me has gone right off the screen!
They get the hump & go away thinking the room is far too clique!
Fair does to you Bonedigger for replying to them :thumbup:
The only way we can change the perception of the unenlightened amongst us is to set an example.
Hey...I will be the first to stand up & admit I make a bit of a fopar in my first few months on SH & was very grateful when someone like you took time out to pm me & point out something that may not be to everyones taste on SH
Please don't change Boney kiss

but if anyone continues to be a prat... 'mod them'

4 Aug 2007

bonedigger was this after the pubs closed as this seems a common time for strange comments, think people tend to loose the fact that just that you are on cam they are not the only people in the world that can see you, and the cam is not totally for them, ahh well bless them, one day they might realise the world doesn't revolve around them, don't fret about it just enjoy yourself for yourself

4 Aug 2007

Hi everyone
Great toppic - we always reply to PM's, and even when its a "thanks but no thanks" reply, quite a lot of people will then reply saying thanks for at least replying!
We think it rude not to reply, and will continue to do so.
We have had a few shity responces, slagging us off for saying no thanks etc, but then if they take "no ta" that baddly thats there problem not ours.
We have never bothered reporting any of these, we feel the mods have a hard enough job to do without us adding to it, but then praps we should so the sore losers dont go on to cause other peeps grief ??
Richard n Donna
xxxxx

4 Aug 2007

Quote by Bronty
...we always reply to PM's... We think it rude not to reply, and will continue to do so.
We have had a few shity responces, slagging us off for saying no thanks etc ...

Do you even reply to these 'shitty ones'? I must say I don't dignify them with a response.

4 Aug 2007

ooooops wrong thread redface

Thought this was about Gordon Brown with a cold dunno

Never had a bad PM, but then never refused anyone :lol2:
I know, I know, I'm a tart rolleyes

4 Aug 2007

Do you even reply to these 'shitty ones'? I must say I don't dignify them with a response.

It depends "how shity", if it shity but making a point then we do, if its just shity then we dont bother.
We have spent some time writing our profile, but no matter how much you write someone will pick holes in it "it dont say that in your profie", usually when thier profile has nothing in it FFS!
People have a problem with the fact that Donna is a lot younger than me, and think just becouse I am 41 she should shag them as well when they 45+
We get grief sometimes when we play on cam, whispers etc, but I think that everyone gets that so we ignore most of it, or paste it into the room and let the regulars in the "Wales" room rip em up ..........
Praps it just a envy thing ??