Interesting thought I just had reading another thread.
Anyone got any ideas what the proportion of Married couples, couples, fuck buddies, or simple people the turn up together to gain entry at a swinging club is? I am talking on a couples night here.
Ive seen quite a few ads where one member just wants another member from here in order to gain entry to xxxxx swingers club on a Saturday night. Do people discuss this with couples in clubs? Every caught anyone out to be a liar?
Whats your opinion on two singles who enter together? Not sure Ive made my mind up yet.
We only used to attend on couples only nights when we first got into swinging, comparing then (4yrs ago) to now the proportion of real couples to fuck buddies/ people hooked up for the night has greatly changed. I would say it used to be around 95% couples to non couples where as now I would say it's closer to max of 80% couples to at least 20% none couples.
I could be wrong but that's the sort of figures I'm estimating from the couples night we used to attend regularly (admittedly we've only been a few times in recent months on couples only nights).
our ten pence worth, and it's only an opinion just before anyone starts having a go!
If two people who want to go to a swing club meet up for the express purpose of doing so, and they both are into swinging, we don't see a problem as long as they both swing together.
If they go in to split up and swing apart, we bet you won't hear any complaints about the woman offering herself to other couples, however we could envisage the guy would not meet the same welcome. No-one says life is fair.
We, as a couple, will swing as a couple, and we avoid nights when single males are allowed in because that's not what we want. We want couples. If a girl on her own offers, we'll probably take it, but here is the rub; we avoid days when singles are allowed in because we don't want single men, and as a result we have to accept that we won't get single women either. Our choice based on our preferences.
As for the scenario of the girl just sitting by the bar with no intention of swinging, waiting for the man to come back, then that's just outright cheating of the rules, and if we saw it we would mention it to the staff, and let them decide.
A last point - where we go, you have to register beforehand to be acknowledged as a couple. Good way if you ask us.
Belles
me and gary have a cpls membership card but in the past iv had cpls membership cards with other guys who iv gone clubs with !
me and gary do live together and are life partners but the other guys werent and their addresses were of course different to mine
dont think the clubs bothered tho
Hey, Brucie, we're not offended - everyone is entitled to their opinions!.....
.......of course, ours are the most correct, if you ask us...!
You're not admitting to something are you....?
Tut tut.
As you suggest, we shall move on, please turn your smutty mind to the post about photos and we'll call it quits!
We've only been stuck in our ways since the last time we changed them...
Very naughty ways they are too, long may they stay so
we go to clubs together as a couple because that is what we are. we also play separately when at clubs which we dont often do on private meets. i have been know to sit at the bar waiting for him to come back from playing as he has been at the bar waiting for me. we do swing together also ... it depends on how the mood takes us and who takes our fancy just as much as if we take someone else's fancy.
i do not have a problem with singles pairing up to make getting in the club cheaper but i can also see from the other point of view that they are not a 'proper' couple, ie not going out in a vanilla type of way.
the only downside i can see from this arrangement is that there is more of a possibility of the guy from the pair up (who generally pays the couple fee for the female) expects to play with the female and she may not necessarily want to. but this can happen in a proper relationship at a club.
also from another point of view ..
there is less likelihood of a 'green eyed monster' raising its head in a pair up for the evening relationship than from a proper relationship so does this make it more or less attractive when it comes to playing with some couples than others.
If two single people want to meet up to get into a club... Why don't they just fuck each other and save a few bob?
Ok, I'm nailing my colours to the mast here. I agree with Fluff. It IS deception to pretend you are a couple to get into a club and then perhaps keep the lie going when talking to other couples. Even if you don't you are lying to the club owner to gain entry.
It may only be a little lie, and as DG says, it is more likely that men are in need to take advantage of this than women are (as they'd get in for less anyway) so the upshot of all this is, more single men getting into clubs cheaply, by pretending they are part of a couple. The reason they want to do that is to get more sex. It isn't the interior decor and cheap bar that brings them in. Nothing wrong with wanting more sex, but I do think there is a potential problem with being deceitful in order to get it. If they will lie about that, what else will they lie about to get a shag?
If I was single i would pair up with a lass for club visits to avoid the entrance fees and to increase my chances of getting laid. (If I got the chance). Its not really my fault if anybody finds this offensive.
what about the single ladies who 'use' the males as taxi's and then expect them to pay the entrance fee, whatever it is. just so that they have an escort to the club and the security that goes along with it. i have been a single female and wanted to visit clubs in the past but been too 'scared' to go alone in case i am 'pounced' on by the couples was i wrong to want that security in knowing i was with someone.
it comes down to (for me at least) can singles swing .. be they females or males .... in my opinion they can. if it is your opinion they can not then that is your right so perhaps a site like this where they don't restrict the memberships to purely couples only is not for you. and also i find that some of those who only play and want to play with couples only also have on their profiles that they are looking for single fems .. is this not perhaps a tad hypocritical if you also dont believe that singles can be called swingers
the one time that I went to a swinging club to fuck several people at once. (Amsterdam 2008) I didn't even speak the same language as the people I was fucking let alone know or care about their marital status.
When worlass and I have been to a swinging club we have failed to find two halves of a couple that we both find attractive. So it is more likely in my humble and novice opinion that we are going to have sex with a pair of fuck buddies... Couples tend to get quite offended if we don't fancy 'them' and only fancy one of 'them' so we end up saying that we don't 'do' couples. So rather than risk offending people we just don't meet couples at clubs. I spend endless hours trawling through profiles and running them by worlass for her approval. It is flippin' tedious really.
If it increased my chances of getting laid in a club if two totally legally/morally/financially seperate people were coupling up to get laid then all power to them.
I tend to wash my hair and dry it 'nicely' to increase my chances.... I even trim my pubes and bleach my moustache.... I think of that as being just as deceptive as 'coupling up' and I would sure as hell lie if asked about it too:- 'Yes, I may be hirsute but my facial hair is that of a new born babe'
My first and only visit to a club was as a "couple" with a single male It's not Dek's scene and I really wanted to try it but didn't want to go on my own either, So I arranged to go with a single male I knew, it made it cheaper for him and because it was a local one some already knew us and knew we were not a proper couple, We didn't play with anyone else, it was purely a taster for me.
At no point did I think I was deceiving anyone. The single male was a regular member at the club so the owner knew he had a single male membership,
I appreciate that some fuck buddies/friends etc go together regularly I don't really see the problem with that either, If they already play together why not go to a club together
Fascinating topic, actually, just to see the dynamic of the responses.
We prefer couples and so this would not be an issue for us unless the guy (and yes we admit to being biased here - see previous post) was swinging on his own and bothered us when we didn't want him to, and also made it obvious that he'd perverted the rules so that he was a single when it was a couples evening. Remember we pay too, and our choice is to go on couples evenings.
Now, if a couple of people who want to swing and go together and play, nominally together, as has been pointed out previously who will ask? If they get set up and go to different rooms, well, married couples do that.
It seems the crux is, we only have couples nights to get rid of the unwanted excesses of single males who just keep pressing the flesh. If they all behaved, there would be no need to have couples only evenings and so this thread would be irrelevant.
*edit* most single guys are honourable and would not create the problem. As usual, the minority spoil things for the majority, but unfortunately that minority force our opinion. It's a crap situation, but it's a reality* end of edit
Or are we being obtuse?
Belles
Res I firmly believe that if you go to a swinging club you really arent gonna expect the management to vet every couple for marital/relationship status. The club are motivated solely by the desire to balance numbers. If they cared about folk being deceived it would be simple enough to insist on evidence of cohabitation. Furthermore, some clubs actively encourage singles to hook up as couples.
So although I have taken your points on board I havent changed my stance.
I am single.
I have a single female membership card for a local club.
I once went as a 'couple' with a buddy of mine - I am now in possession of that couple's membership card.
I have discussed this with the owners - they know that many single females don't feel comfortable going to clubs on their own. (I have in the past, it has always been cool.) They also know that a majority of clientele (probably couples) don't like loads of single males in the club.
So, are they going to turn their nose up at a 'couple' (i.e. pair of fuck buddies or whatever nominal term you want to assign to them) who want to come and spend a night at their club?
I doubt it somehow.
And anyway, if everyone is there to enjoy recreational sex, and all have a jolly good time who really cares?
Well..........As I have said.....
I have paired up with a single female to go to a social event at a club and have an ad running for any single female that wishes to visit a club and have a male accompany her.....
In return I do not expect sex or any sexual contact if the lady in question does not wish it.....
Yours deceitfully
Steve.
Just as a general clarification, can you (that's a general 'you', no-one specific) tell us why you want to go on 'couples' nights which are much less frequent than 'normal' general access nights?
Is there anything about these nights that is special, other than the general lack of singles....?
Belles
ok, perfectly valid, sometimes you have to roll with what's happening.
Now, we are a couple, and we are essentially restricted to when we go because of the 'couples' thing. Yes, the cliquey comment is entirely valid. But we have an artificial restriction put on us by the desire to avoid single males (sorry to all those genuine guys, read above for disclaimers!) and I think that is maybe why we are protecting our ground a bit. Non Couples nights are the majority.
But, singles who team up to play seamlessly with couples won't actaully be any different to couples. It's how you play it, really. Play like a couple, and no-one knows any different, most of the time.
Of course, we always like to chat to people, so if you talk to us, get your story straight before you start or be bloody good at whatever you do to us!
Belles
Dear me, I seem to have upset the applecart somewhat this evening by my inelegance in expressing exactly what I meant.
The term "deceit" seems to have raised a few hackles, when I really didn't intend it to.
In my post earlier I was, in my mind at least, referring to people who "pretend" to be a couple to gain entry to a club on a couples only night and who then upon entry, revert to being single for the evening for reasons of finance and sexual gratification (because the 'odds' are better)
As I have no direct experience of this, I can only go on what my reaction would be if we were in this situation and to be honest, I would feel a little aggrieved that on a night supposedly for couples, there were X number of single people who made no bones about hiding the fact and who had no intention of playing as a couple. It would make the entire point of a "couples" night redundant in my view and I maintain in this situation, they have obtained entry by less than honest means and are going against the entire raison d'etre for the evening.
I understand why single men and women would do this, presumably it would mean less male competition thus more chance of sex, but for couples who want to play with other couples alone, is it fair? I don't think it is. Not when the night is advertised as such and I think that people who knowingly abuse it in the way I stated above, are being less than honest. I would question just why they feel the need to do this.
I think also I need to define how I see 'a couple'. When I said that, I did not mean solely in a traditional sense, as in man and wife, or even as a couple living together. I did mean couples in their many and varied forms, such as in fuckbuddies, or indeed any combination of people who play together. But I think in this situation playing together, however you choose to do it, has to be a primary consideration. Perhaps more so than their marital status. I apologise if I gave the wrong impression on this aspect as I think I must have done judging by some of the responses.
I fully contend that I was operating from an entirely hypothetical and personal situation. The reality of clubs may well be different. I don't know and I never will and judging by the reaction and my own innate fear of them, I am not likely to find out either. However this does not make me a hypocrite either. Stupid, misguided, inaccurate, foolish, naive and boring, indubitably so. Choose your weapon to beat me with, there's plenty to pick from.
As Hugh Grant once said... I think it is best I go where other people are not.
I fully contend there are excellent reasons for attending a club with a partner and many of them have been elegantly expressed above. Safety being an obvious one. However I am wary that using this or another convenient truism to gain entry on a couples night, when you have no intention of playing as a couple, is somewhat misleading at best. I also find it very odd that the most vociferous defenders of single swingers, seem so keen to defend their right to attend 'couples only' nights and then blame "the couples" for taking offence.
The one thing I have learned in my relatively short time here is that the more I learn about this whole thing we call swinging, the less I understand.
If I have offended anybody earlier, I do apologise, that was not my intention, but I cannot follow the logic of this, and only this, argument.
Would you feel cheated if a night was advertised as a "Sexy Black Stripper Night" and turned up to find just 2 black guys (both gay) and 30 middle aged, paunchy, white men? Or is this the norm? Or is it just a case of clubs that they advertise and just accept anybody who turns up on that night and is willing to pay, because if it is the latter, that would concern me a great deal. Or how about a singles night, and a large percentage who turned up were married folks just on the lookout for some extra-marital nookie? Of course I'm being devils advocate here and using extremes, but I think the principle is similar.
My argument is not with single swingers, couple swingers or menage et trois or quadrophonics or whatever... it is with the fact that the truth of a person(s) situation is being distorted for personal gain and puts you in a position where you can exploit the situation and mislead other people. That makes me feel uncomfortable I'm afraid. Not that I think the majority of people WOULD do that, but I think if some people are prepared to bend the truth to get into the club, they may have less hesitation in doing it again to secure themselves a shag and that worries me. I stress again, I am not saying anybody here WOULD do this, but I fear some people may not be so quick to reveal the whole truth, if they feel it would jeopardise their chance of a shag, even if they have got in for half price.
But what do I know? I am a tired old cynic these days. We don't go to clubs, we don't swing in the traditional sense and it is all hypothetical for me. I may well be wrong and if I am, I am sure I will be put in my rightful place but I do stress that I did not mean to cause anyone any offence and that I only took issue with what I believe to be a blatant distortion of the facts, in order to take advantage of an opportunity. It's that premise, and that alone, that I have an issue with.
? On the other hand, at what point do you decide couples are couples? Do they have to be married, cohabiting, together for a minimum period of time? Couples usually go to swinging clubs to 'play' with other people anyway, not their own partner. Attending as a couple helps to keep the proportions of male to female more even. If singles are allowed, men tend to dominate.
My eyes are always being opened wider. Call me stoopid but I had not considered before that couples (real ones) may go to a club and then play separately. Having not got round that much even having been here sooo long still pretty naive. 
