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The Killers

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Resonance
Sex God
All you firm young things who listen to the radio on your ippods, wear sunglasses and say "Yo!" a lot, will no doubt know that a band called "The Killers" released a song a while back called "I've got Soul but I'm not a Soldier."
As Comedian Bill Bailey pointed out. It is rather a facile statement. Akin to
"I've got ham but I'm not a Hamster."
Could all you clever SH folk make up any more versions of the song?
(NB. I am now aware that this was not the original title of the song. However I am too lazy to edit it and prefer you to think of me as subnormal, semi-literate, ill-educated and so out of touch with modern society and tastes that I fully expect Keith Chegwin's happy face on my TV screen on Saturday mornings.)
Resonance
Sex God
I'll start you off with one...
"I've got Plums but I'm not a Plumber..."
cumasautra
Warming the Bed
lol Thats my favourite song by The Killers - All These Things That I've Done...
Unknown User
I've got apples but I am not an orchard and couldn't bake a pie!!
I haven't got the hang of this have I? bolt
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by blonde
I've got apples but I am not an orchard and couldn't bake a pie!!
I haven't got the hang of this have I? bolt
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

That sounds more like a Traditional swing song to me Sam, it has a certain quality to it... I can almost see Frank Sinatra there
"I got apples, but I'm no orchard...
"And I couldn't bake a pieee....."
I think it would go well...
Unknown User
"I've got Cock.....but I'm not a Cockle".
Actually, being a woman that's not true lol
(I've posted.....think I'm coming over all peculiar!).
Hello smile
Unknown User
Try again...
I've got stairs but I am not a ladder!
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
p.s. Hello Bluesapphire
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by Bluesapphire
"I've got Cock.....but I'm not a Cockle".
Actually, being a woman that's not true lol
(I've posted.....think I'm coming over all peculiar!).
Hello smile

Welcome Blue Sapphire, and a fine first post!
I've got post but I'm not a poster!
Unknown User
Thank you. I've been a lurker for quite a while and love your posts. You have a unique style!
"I have Plaice....but I don't have a Plaicestation".
OK, I need to focus a little more.
confused
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by blonde
Try again...
I've got stairs but I am not a ladder!
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
p.s. Hello Bluesapphire

Awww Sam... Now you see, I applaud effort in every form and without wishing to appear condescending in anyway, I do like the notion that you may have stairs, and I do not doubt, for one moment, that you are a not ladder in any sense of the word.
Unfortunately the general idea is that your first statement... Such as "I've got COCK" is linked to the rebuttal in the second part of the sentence "but I'm not a COCKle..." You see? Cock and Cockle are kind of linked by a single verifiable Cock. A bit like many people on this site, one would assume.
I feel I must point this out, otherwise we could end up with plenty of odd, avantegarde appraisals of peoples general situation...
"I've got satellite but I'm not a spaceship."
"I've got a fridge but I'm not a freezer."
"I've got Persil Automatic, but I am not a brand of supermarket's own washing detergent..."
And that way lies madness...
So Sam, because I am a kind soul, of warm spirit and affable nature, I'm going to help you out here... So far we have...
I've got Soul but I'm not a Soldier
I've got Plumbs but I'm not a plumber,
I've got Ham but I'm not a Hamster
I've got Cock but I'm not a Cockle...
So...
I've got Fur but I'm not a ...???
I know you can do this... So come on... Don't let me and the Folk of SH down...! ;-)
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by Bluesapphire
Thank you. I've been a lurker for quite a while and love your posts. You have a unique style!
"I have Plaice....but I don't have a Plaicestation".
OK, I need to focus a little more.
confused

Lmao! I do love a dreadful pun!
Are all yours aquatic themed?
I have eels but I'm not an eeeloper...
I have crabs but... Oh no hang on... best not go down that route... ;-)
Unknown User
Quote by Resonance
I've got Soul but I'm not a Soldier
I've got Plumbs but I'm not a plumber,
I've got Ham but I'm not a Hamster
I've got Cock but I'm not a Cockle...
So...
I've got Fur but I'm not a ...???
I know you can do this... So come on... Don't let me and the Folk of SH down...! ;-)

I've got Fur but I'm not a bit of furniture.
Did I get it right????? :bounce:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by blonde

I've got Soul but I'm not a Soldier
I've got Plumbs but I'm not a plumber,
I've got Ham but I'm not a Hamster
I've got Cock but I'm not a Cockle...
So...
I've got Fur but I'm not a ...???
I know you can do this... So come on... Don't let me and the Folk of SH down...! ;-)

I've got Fur but I'm not a bit of furniture.
Did I get it right????? :bounce:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
YAYAYYAYY !!!!!!!!!!!
That's the fella... I admit you chose one I didn't think of... I had Furby in my mind! Or Fur Coat or Fur-Ker! ;-) :-)
It wasn't a very easy one to give you actually, I should have given you...
"I've got discs but I'm not a ...." Yeah well, it's obvious now innit?!
Tan____Kinky
Sex God
Quote by blonde

I've got Soul but I'm not a Soldier
I've got Plumbs but I'm not a plumber,
I've got Ham but I'm not a Hamster
I've got Cock but I'm not a Cockle...
So...
I've got Fur but I'm not a ...???
I know you can do this... So come on... Don't let me and the Folk of SH down...! ;-)

I've got Fur but I'm not a bit of furniture.
Did I get it right????? :bounce:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Ive got fur but I'm not a fur ball wink
Unknown User
Quote by Resonance
"I've got discs but I'm not a .... Russian Shot putter!

:smug: I am getting good at this! kiss Thanks
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Unknown User
I've got a Lob (on).....but I'm not a Lobster".
"I have a Sword .... but I'm not a Swordfish".
Aquatically themed? What are you carping on about?
I'm beginning to clam up. I ne-more finspiration as I'm no longer a dab hand at this. I think my brain has been sturgically removed.
lol
Hello Sam smile
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by blonde

"I've got discs but I'm not a .... Russian Shot putter!

:smug: I am getting good at this! kiss Thanks
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
rotflmao :rotflmao:
But you could be a discus thrower then?
I was thinking "disco" but hey... I like your answer far better!
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by Tan--Kinky
I've got boxes but I'm not a boxer

Oooh! When do I get the invite to the private gallery then?
I've got hard but I'm not a hard-knock... ;-)
Unknown User
I've got hands but I'm not handsome sad
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by Bluesapphire
I've got a Lob (on).....but I'm not a Lobster".
"I have a Sword .... but I'm not a Swordfish".
Aquatically themed? What are you carping on about?
I'm beginning to clam up. I ne-more finspiration as I'm no longer a dab hand at this. I think my brain has been sturgically removed.
lol
Hello Sam smile

Oh No! A fellow punner! Get thee to a punnery or you'll make some anemone's all over the plaice. Can I ask if you have got a nice bass? :-)
I've got puns but I'm not a punter...
Unknown User
Quote by Bluesapphire
Hello Sam smile

Hello Bluesapphire wave
..........Aquatically themed?
What about .........
I eat Jelly ...... but I am not a Jelly fish?
Best I could do at such short notice!!
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Tan____Kinky
Sex God
Invite to my private gallery oh my that's asking alot lol
I've got fags but I'm not a faggot :lol:
I've got men but I'm not mental (open to debate)
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by fluff_n_stuff
I've got hands but I'm not handsome sad

Damn Fluff, who made you my own personal songwriter...
biggrin :D
"I got hair but I'm not quite sure where..."
"I got pens but I'm not a penis..."
Unknown User
"I can Gurn.... but I'm not a Gurnard".
"I've got Nips...but I'm not a Nipper".
Mr Resonance, it's a pun a minnowte this afternoon!
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by Tan--Kinky
Invite to my private gallery oh my that's asking alot lol
I've got fags but I'm not a faggot :lol:
I've got men but I'm not mental (open to debate)

rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
"I've got Books but I'm not Buxom"
You are though... sillyhwoar:
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by Bluesapphire
"I can Gurn.... but I'm not a Gurnard".
"I've got Nips...but I'm not a Nipper".
Mr Resonance, it's a pun a minnowte this afternoon!

I wasn't going to B-roach the subject to be honest. I smelt something fishy immediately. I thought it was a bream at first, i zander-ed if sh-eel notice the piscatorial references? I floundered not knowing what to do next.
Or is it all just Pollocks? ;-)
I got buns but I'm not a bunker...
Unknown User
I am hot.....but I'm not a hotty!
(very sunny up here today!)
Resonance
Sex God
Quote by Lucyandmike7
I am hot.....but I'm not a hotty!
(very sunny up here today!)

Very good! But so not true!!!
Resonance
Sex God
I got Toes but I'm not a toaster
I got Dogs but I'm not a dogger
I got Spam but I'm not a Spammer