A friend of mine has just told me that they know someone whose daughter hits her mother. I was horrified and wondered how the parents can lose such control to have let this happen.
I would not let my daughter ever think she could do this to me, I love my children so much but to let this happen without consequences would be failing my children.
I am shocked to hear of any child treating their parents in such a manner.
How would you feel if this was you?
What action would you take to stop it from happening again?
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What would you do if your child hit you?
Sex God
:shock:
Id be mortified.
More to the point Id be quite worried too. Id be wondering what was troubling a child to go to such extremes.
Id be mortified.
More to the point Id be quite worried too. Id be wondering what was troubling a child to go to such extremes.
I work with pre-school children and I can see how this happens even 4yrs olds have very little respect for their parents and it shocks me how the parents let it happen.
There is an advert on the tv for kwikfit where the young lad is hitting hell out the water cooler, I have seen things like this happen and parents just ignoring what is going on...
I have seen parents telling children off and not evening changing the tone of their voices..
I do think some parents are their own worst enemy and they have allowed this type of behaviour to build up of a number of years and then they wonder why they have gone wrong...
I am not a big advocate for smacking have never had to resort to that with mine, but Dave and I do have respect in our house and our daughter knows how far she can go before discpline kicks in, we all have our own way to discpline our children, but some parents are lacking in basic parenting skills and often learn the hard way unfortuately...
Sam x
There is an advert on the tv for kwikfit where the young lad is hitting hell out the water cooler, I have seen things like this happen and parents just ignoring what is going on...
I have seen parents telling children off and not evening changing the tone of their voices..
I do think some parents are their own worst enemy and they have allowed this type of behaviour to build up of a number of years and then they wonder why they have gone wrong...
I am not a big advocate for smacking have never had to resort to that with mine, but Dave and I do have respect in our house and our daughter knows how far she can go before discpline kicks in, we all have our own way to discpline our children, but some parents are lacking in basic parenting skills and often learn the hard way unfortuately...
Sam x
Quote by tyracer
i'd dig a large hole in the garden.
whack child over head with shovel.
Place body in the hole and back fill.
Done and done
Sounds like a great idea. :lol:
When a parent shows a child no boundaries, no rules and no respect, is it any wonder a child would do this?
My kids would never ever of even contemplated doing this. A parent who allows their child to do this, should hang their heads in shame. Get a grip of being a parent, or maybe should never have been one in the first place.
The boundaries should be laid within the first year of the child's life! Good parenting means that you have to get off your backside and actually be involved in setting boundaries and meaning them. So many people take the easier option of just letting children get away with so much poor behaviour...for the fear of possible tantrums that follow. Parenting is bloody tiring, but if you put some effort in..life is so much more peaceful, happier and calmer!!!
I wouldn't know what to do if the child was much, much older as it seems that maybe somehow respect had been lost or the child was harbouring a lot of anger or upset about something???
I wouldn't know what to do if the child was much, much older as it seems that maybe somehow respect had been lost or the child was harbouring a lot of anger or upset about something???
I would be greatly upset.....as it would mean I had failed as a parent. I hate violence in any form. The few times me and my daughter have had words....i get down to her level...( always a good ploy as not playing the big bully then)...I look her straight in the eye and tell her what I think. We discuss it without drama and fuss.....and come out hugging each other and quite often in tears together.
Sex God
Quote by Theladyisaminx
A friend of mine has just told me that they know someone whose daughter hits her mother. I was horrified and wondered how the parents can lose such control to have let this happen.
I would not let my daughter ever think she could do this to me, I love my children so much but to let this happen without consequences would be failing my children.
I am shocked to hear of any child treating their parents in such a manner.
How would you feel if this was you?
What action would you take to stop it from happening again?
Minx, there are times when I read some of your posts and think that I would love to live in your world for a day. I'm not meaning to be flippant, but I think you are a tad naive here. It is unfortunately more common than you would think. Domestic violence takes many, many forms. Children abusing parents is just one.
Sad but true.
Sex God
Touches a nerve with me this subject as right at this present time my daughter is being bullied by three girls (once mates apparently) Well I have had to deal with bullying before at school. Fortunately, through advice from here :thumbup: and elsewhere, together with the school and the LEA matters are to a greater extent resolved in that area.
What has reared its ugly head is these three girls enjoying the terrorism they are trying to inflict on my daughter. My daughter has grown to be quite a tough cookie and is handling this crap well. Though when I hear her sobbing in her bedroom in the early hours because she cant sleep it does put a lump in my throat.
Moving on. We had an incident which made it important that i go and see the parents of these three girls. I'm not casting any aspersions when i indicate that these girls are all from single parent families just letting you know the facts. Whether they are not only matters in my mind that a parent had no partner support in this case.
Three parents with three different reactions, One parent was horrified and immediately asked her child what was going on. The child sheepishly admitted in front of me and her mother stuff that was relevant and was a revelation to the mother. The parent is now aware that though her child is/was involved in the bullying of my child she was also suffering some quite serious stuff from another of the girls involved, including extorting money.
The next parent I would say just denied the possibility that this could occur and in not so many words we were told to go. No discussion no anything.
The third parent is the reason for me posting on this topic by Minx. Well I could not believe the abuse the parent got from the child when questioned the swearing the shouting and the threats of violence hurled from this 13 year old at her, I would say late 30's Mom whilst I was there, almost blew me away.
Later on it is found out that the Mom of this third child is at the end of a regular beating from her daughter and this is known by my daughter but typically something until then she had kept from me. The fact that my daughter has now said that she has witnessed this girl slapping and punching her Mom has saddened me to what now to do?
I have no idea about what to do on this. The child is obviously in distress and has severe behavioural/aggression issues (ffs pc speak or what splut splut)and the mother is in need also.
I have to admit my first inclination and what im actively doing is making sure my daughter is away from that girl. I really feel quite guilty but I guess I really have no business in their business. It really doesn't make me feel very neighbourly though
What has reared its ugly head is these three girls enjoying the terrorism they are trying to inflict on my daughter. My daughter has grown to be quite a tough cookie and is handling this crap well. Though when I hear her sobbing in her bedroom in the early hours because she cant sleep it does put a lump in my throat.
Moving on. We had an incident which made it important that i go and see the parents of these three girls. I'm not casting any aspersions when i indicate that these girls are all from single parent families just letting you know the facts. Whether they are not only matters in my mind that a parent had no partner support in this case.
Three parents with three different reactions, One parent was horrified and immediately asked her child what was going on. The child sheepishly admitted in front of me and her mother stuff that was relevant and was a revelation to the mother. The parent is now aware that though her child is/was involved in the bullying of my child she was also suffering some quite serious stuff from another of the girls involved, including extorting money.
The next parent I would say just denied the possibility that this could occur and in not so many words we were told to go. No discussion no anything.
The third parent is the reason for me posting on this topic by Minx. Well I could not believe the abuse the parent got from the child when questioned the swearing the shouting and the threats of violence hurled from this 13 year old at her, I would say late 30's Mom whilst I was there, almost blew me away.
Later on it is found out that the Mom of this third child is at the end of a regular beating from her daughter and this is known by my daughter but typically something until then she had kept from me. The fact that my daughter has now said that she has witnessed this girl slapping and punching her Mom has saddened me to what now to do?
I have no idea about what to do on this. The child is obviously in distress and has severe behavioural/aggression issues (ffs pc speak or what splut splut)and the mother is in need also.
I have to admit my first inclination and what im actively doing is making sure my daughter is away from that girl. I really feel quite guilty but I guess I really have no business in their business. It really doesn't make me feel very neighbourly though
Quote by noladreams30
A friend of mine has just told me that they know someone whose daughter hits her mother. I was horrified and wondered how the parents can lose such control to have let this happen.
I would not let my daughter ever think she could do this to me, I love my children so much but to let this happen without consequences would be failing my children.
I am shocked to hear of any child treating their parents in such a manner.
How would you feel if this was you?
What action would you take to stop it from happening again?
Minx, there are times when I read some of your posts and think that I would love to live in your world for a day. I'm not meaning to be flippant, but I think you are a tad naive here. It is unfortunately more common than you would think. Domestic violence takes many, many forms. Children abusing parents is just one.
Sad but true.
Nola I am not naive!
I live in this world the same as you, of course I know it goes on, but it still doesn't make it any less shockable when I hear it.
Don't forget I am a beiever in smacking as last result who knows I might get one back one day.
Althought I havent had to smack my children for a few years as they know now where the boundaries lie. and I have always said to mine if you ever left a finger to me I would break your arm. sounds barbaric I never would but they are not totally sure I wouldn't. I believe they have to have that touch of fear to stay behind the boundaries. Just because I put the threat there doesn't mean I love them any less. We also talk a lot about emotions anger feelings and how to deal with them, as we can all have these feelings at times it is how we deal with them that counts.
I don't know why you seem to think I live in a cocoon you couldn't be further from the truth.
Sex God
Quote by helnheaven
:shock:
Id be mortified.
Me too :shock:
I hope i'm right thinking i don't have any :scared:
Quote by SamndaveA child will do what it can get away with, then one day it discovers it can not stab someone and ends up in jail.
I work with pre-school children and I can see how this happens even 4yrs olds have very little respect for their parents and it shocks me how the parents let it happen.
...
Sam x
Is it the child's fault?
Travis
Quote by kentswingers777
When a parent shows a child no boundaries, no rules and no respect, is it any wonder a child would do this?
My kids would never ever of even contemplated doing this. A parent who allows their child to do this, should hang their heads in shame. Get a grip of being a parent, or maybe should never have been one in the first place.
Sounds like we are one step away from discussing a certain thread from last week eh lol
Parents haveto be the ones that teach their child right from wrong, from an early age - fail to instill discipline at home and you can almost guarantee that the child will grow up with very little respect for anyone for probably the duration of their adult life.
I have to admit that my son, who is now 6, went thro a phase of thinking it was fine to hit out at me when he threw a tantrum. Whilst i had told him off and told him that to hit me was wrong it had not deterred him very much. Then one day he thumped his grandfather and i was mortified. The riot act was duly read to him and after that he was warned once that it was not acceptable behaviour and if it happened again he ended up on the naughty step - yes i have a naughty step and boy does it work lol.
I dread to think how he might be now if i had not stamped on it straightaway.
Oooooopps - i'm not here really
Sex God
Quote by Theladyisaminx
A friend of mine has just told me that they know someone whose daughter hits her mother. I was horrified and wondered how the parents can lose such control to have let this happen.
I would not let my daughter ever think she could do this to me, I love my children so much but to let this happen without consequences would be failing my children.
I am shocked to hear of any child treating their parents in such a manner.
How would you feel if this was you?
What action would you take to stop it from happening again?
Minx, there are times when I read some of your posts and think that I would love to live in your world for a day. I'm not meaning to be flippant, but I think you are a tad naive here. It is unfortunately more common than you would think. Domestic violence takes many, many forms. Children abusing parents is just one.
Sad but true.
Nola I am not naive!
I live in this world the same as you, of course I know it goes on, but it still doesn't make it any less shockable when I hear it.
Don't forget I am a beiever in smacking as last result who knows I might get one back one day.
Althought I havent had to smack my children for a few years as they know now where the boundaries lie. and I have always said to mine if you ever left a finger to me I would break your arm. sounds barbaric I never would but they are not totally sure I wouldn't. I believe they have to have that touch of fear to stay behind the boundaries. Just because I put the threat there doesn't mean I love them any less. We also talk a lot about emotions anger feelings and how to deal with them, as we can all have these feelings at times it is how we deal with them that counts.
I don't know why you seem to think I live in a cocoon you couldn't be further from the truth.
Minx, maybe I sounded a bit flippant. Apologies if my post offended you.
Unfortunately this is something I come across quite often in my work. I was expressing surprise at your shock. Maybe that is me showing my more cynical side. Bullying of parents by their children - both physical and emotional - is very common and, as I said, it is unfortunately something I see quite a lot.
Quote by benrums0n
Many people lack the skills to be a successful parent. Society really does need to do something about that.
We don't seem to be doing very much.
Nice to see you posting again Ben.
I thought the skills of being a good parent should include taking responsibilty for your child?
If a parent allows their child to hit them, how is that societies fault? It is without doubt the parent who is to blame. If they hit their parents how long will it be before that same child hits another child, or worse a teacher?
Sorry but a lot of parents lack the basis skills of being a parent, and if you do not have those skills then you are in big trouble but....if as a parent you allow your child to hit you, then in my opinion you will deserve all that you get from that child, in later life when it becomes yet another ferel thug.
My middle daughter went ot hit me once, you can't sterio type the type of child that does this, it wasnt a case of she was naughty at 4 and got worse every since, she was a very loving child and it wasn't till she hit puberty that she started, lets say going off the rails slighty, now i know people always blame the parents for everything kids do and to me thats wrong, when they get to teenage years they develope their own personalitys and no matter what you do some kids will just fight against you, i would never hit any of my kids, i have three daughters and have never risen a hand to any of them, i do not believe its the way, but bar hitting her i have tried everything, now as i have just said i have three kids and neither of my other children are like her, my eldest is a pleasure to have, then youngest is only 7 so not hit the teenage years yet, but over all a good child, i have said on many occasions how can you bring kids up the same and them be so very very diffarent?? if it was my bad parenting thats made my middle daughter the way she is why arn't all my children the same?
Quote by noladreams30
A friend of mine has just told me that they know someone whose daughter hits her mother. I was horrified and wondered how the parents can lose such control to have let this happen.
I would not let my daughter ever think she could do this to me, I love my children so much but to let this happen without consequences would be failing my children.
I am shocked to hear of any child treating their parents in such a manner.
How would you feel if this was you?
What action would you take to stop it from happening again?
Minx, there are times when I read some of your posts and think that I would love to live in your world for a day. I'm not meaning to be flippant, but I think you are a tad naive here. It is unfortunately more common than you would think. Domestic violence takes many, many forms. Children abusing parents is just one.
Sad but true.
Nola I am not naive!
I live in this world the same as you, of course I know it goes on, but it still doesn't make it any less shockable when I hear it.
Don't forget I am a beiever in smacking as last result who knows I might get one back one day.
Althought I havent had to smack my children for a few years as they know now where the boundaries lie. and I have always said to mine if you ever left a finger to me I would break your arm. sounds barbaric I never would but they are not totally sure I wouldn't. I believe they have to have that touch of fear to stay behind the boundaries. Just because I put the threat there doesn't mean I love them any less. We also talk a lot about emotions anger feelings and how to deal with them, as we can all have these feelings at times it is how we deal with them that counts.
I don't know why you seem to think I live in a cocoon you couldn't be further from the truth.
Minx, maybe I sounded a bit flippant. Apologies if my post offended you.
Unfortunately this is something I come across quite often in my work. I was expressing surprise at your shock. Maybe that is me showing my more cynical side. Bullying of parents by their children - both physical and emotional - is very common and, as I said, it is unfortunately something I see quite a lot.
Nola,
I was not offended by your comments at all
I was just coming back with a response,
I may have worded my op slightly incorrectly.
I know a lot of things go on, but it still really shocks and saddens me when I hear it.
What are the answers?
When is respect going to be restored in this country?
How are such issues addressed now?
What can we all do to stop them happening?
This isn't just theses incidences but all types of violence and lack of respect!
When did it all go wrong?
How did it all go wrong?
All I am blessed with is a supportive husband who backs me up when things get out of hand. He only has to now bite his lip and our children know they need to get back in line.
They are not suppressed and they have freedom to speak there mind, what they don't have is the freedom to show lack of respect.
My children are now at the age of questioning others actions, my son is 17 and he believes that schools should bring back the cane, this is something that we have not instilled in him, and I have said there is more to it than that, as we all know. But if you look back I believe when they removed the cane, was when we started on this slippery slope.
Who knows?
I feel the most important thing in life is education.
It is a crying shame some people seem past educating.
Quote by naughtynymphos1
My middle daughter went ot hit me once, you can't sterio type the type of child that does this, it wasnt a case of she was naughty at 4 and got worse every since, she was a very loving child and it wasn't till she hit puberty that she started, lets say going off the rails slighty, now i know people always blame the parents for everything kids do and to me thats wrong, when they get to teenage years they develope their own personalitys and no matter what you do some kids will just fight against you, i would never hit any of my kids, i have three daughters and have never risen a hand to any of them, i do not believe its the way, but bar hitting her i have tried everything, now as i have just said i have three kids and neither of my other children are like her, my eldest is a pleasure to have, then youngest is only 7 so not hit the teenage years yet, but over all a good child, i have said on many occasions how can you bring kids up the same and them be so very very diffarent?? if it was my bad parenting thats made my middle daughter the way she is why arn't all my children the same?
I have a 17 year old boy and twins boy and girl 12.
I would say boys are so much easier, they have never pushed me as far as my daughter does. But she is the one that is loving considerate giving, loyal to her freinds, great with smaller children and animals. But when she gets a bee in her bonnet o my it is like world world three has just broken out.
When I get to the bottom of it all, it is generally sparked by something that has happened at school, an argument with a friend. Once she has calmed down you can reason and understand her she has said she feels frustrated by how nasty some people can be, but she finds it easier to take her frustrations out at home.
She said she feels safer doing this as she knows we will always be here for her.
She has told me after an argument with me that the reason she is so upset was because she had horrible thoughts about me, then she feels guilty. I totally understand this as I used to with my mum.
I think sometimes girls find it harder than boys as we let things get to us more, boys just seem more able to brush them off.
I have friends with girls to they come to me to talk about things, what I have witnessed is that the girls that are much more caring by nature are the ones that get frustrated and pent up the most, because things really hurt them and they find it hard to cope with their innmost feelings.
Mostly it is their friends unknowning to them that have said something that seems so trival, that really gets taken to heart.
This is just my opinion.
Quote by keeno
Just one question...
Where did the child learn that hitting someone is an acceptable solution to a problem?
Any guesses?
Some would say when being smacked by their parents.
I have hit one person in my yonger years and that isn't something I feel proud of, as you know I have been bullied from a prevous thread.
But I hit her after she was in my face not backing of after i tryed talking and reasoning with her, I used it as a last resort. You could say thats because I was smacked as a last resort punishment as a child.
You could say my children would hit because they have been smacked, but my children have never hit anyone in their lives.
It is somewhat strange in my opinion that you hear parents not just here but other places to that say mine hit other children, but we have never smacked them in their lives.
So I guess you have to work out your own answers to your question.
These are just my views!
Quote by Theladyisaminx
Just one question...
Where did the child learn that hitting someone is an acceptable solution to a problem?
Any guesses?
Some would say when being smacked by their parents.
I have hit one person in my yonger years and that isn't something I feel proud of, as you know I have been bullied from a prevous thread.
But I hit her after she was in my face not backing of after i tryed talking and reasoning with her, I used it as a last resort. You could say thats because I was smacked as a last resort punishment as a child.
You could say my children would hit because they have been smacked, but my children have never hit anyone in their lives.
It is somewhat strange in my opinion that you hear parents not just here but other places to that say mine hit other children, but we have never smacked them in their lives.
So I guess you have to work out your own answers to your question.
These are just my views!
Sorry just wanted to add this thought to.
How would a child know that to hit hurts?
So ask yourself this to smack a child isn't it teaching them something to?
I dont hit my children or beat it has in the past been a slap on the back of the hand or the legs.
I know I will be called barbaric for my actions.
Quote by Theladyisaminx
Just one question...
Where did the child learn that hitting someone is an acceptable solution to a problem?
Any guesses?
Some would say when being smacked by their parents.
I have hit one person in my yonger years and that isn't something I feel proud of, as you know I have been bullied from a prevous thread.
But I hit her after she was in my face not backing of after i tryed talking and reasoning with her, I used it as a last resort. You could say thats because I was smacked as a last resort punishment as a child.
You could say my children would hit because they have been smacked, but my children have never hit anyone in their lives.
It is somewhat strange in my opinion that you hear parents not just here but other places to that say mine hit other children, but we have never smacked them in their lives.
So I guess you have to work out your own answers to your question.
These are just my views!
Sorry just wanted to add this thought to.
How would a child know that to hit hurts?
So ask yourself this to smack a child isn't it teaching them something to?
I dont hit my children or beat it has in the past been a slap on the back of the hand or the legs.
I know I will be called barbaric for my actions.
Minx you have guessed a lot from my question. I would be tempted to suggest that there is a degree of violence between man and wife. Clearly I don't know these people and I am only guessing but..... well It makes you think.
Quote by keeno
Just one question...
Where did the child learn that hitting someone is an acceptable solution to a problem?
Any guesses?
Some would say when being smacked by their parents.
I have hit one person in my yonger years and that isn't something I feel proud of, as you know I have been bullied from a prevous thread.
But I hit her after she was in my face not backing of after i tryed talking and reasoning with her, I used it as a last resort. You could say thats because I was smacked as a last resort punishment as a child.
You could say my children would hit because they have been smacked, but my children have never hit anyone in their lives.
It is somewhat strange in my opinion that you hear parents not just here but other places to that say mine hit other children, but we have never smacked them in their lives.
So I guess you have to work out your own answers to your question.
These are just my views!
Sorry just wanted to add this thought to.
How would a child know that to hit hurts?
So ask yourself this to smack a child isn't it teaching them something to?
I dont hit my children or beat it has in the past been a slap on the back of the hand or the legs.
I know I will be called barbaric for my actions.
Minx you have guessed a lot from my question. I would be tempted to suggest that there is a degree of violence between man and wife. Clearly I don't know these people and I am only guessing but..... well It makes you think.
Yep I agree that could be the case to.
But then that would be opening up a whole different can of worms.
Sexlightened
At the age of 7 my daughter was bullied at school by a boy of the same age who used to hit, kick and punch her. She was teased by the boy who made fun of her nan who had just died and her grandad was dying of cancer and make jokes about that. She would cry so much and wished she was dead at the time.
I went to the school and it turned out they had had problems with the boy since he was 4 years old but the parents where very agreesive in their manner and the school was trying their best to sort it out but like all schools now a days they are restricted as to what they can do. The school put in measures that the boy was kept away from my daughter and the bullying stop, but sadly he found yet more children to bully.
However some 16 months later I was out in town on a Saturday night with some friends and out of no where I was punched to the floor by the mother of the children who was screaming I had got her child into trouble at school.
The police didnt want to know about the incident and it took them 8 months to tell me this, the school however where wonderful, they made sure the parents were aware that if another incident happened like this that the parents would not be welcome on the school property, they made sure that my child was kept away from the boy concerned and a week later the child moved school. And that was the end of that.
I went to the school and it turned out they had had problems with the boy since he was 4 years old but the parents where very agreesive in their manner and the school was trying their best to sort it out but like all schools now a days they are restricted as to what they can do. The school put in measures that the boy was kept away from my daughter and the bullying stop, but sadly he found yet more children to bully.
However some 16 months later I was out in town on a Saturday night with some friends and out of no where I was punched to the floor by the mother of the children who was screaming I had got her child into trouble at school.
The police didnt want to know about the incident and it took them 8 months to tell me this, the school however where wonderful, they made sure the parents were aware that if another incident happened like this that the parents would not be welcome on the school property, they made sure that my child was kept away from the boy concerned and a week later the child moved school. And that was the end of that.
Quote by Theladyisaminx
Just one question...
Where did the child learn that hitting someone is an acceptable solution to a problem?
Any guesses?
Some would say when being smacked by their parents.
I have hit one person in my yonger years and that isn't something I feel proud of, as you know I have been bullied from a prevous thread.
But I hit her after she was in my face not backing of after i tryed talking and reasoning with her, I used it as a last resort. You could say thats because I was smacked as a last resort punishment as a child.
You could say my children would hit because they have been smacked, but my children have never hit anyone in their lives.
It is somewhat strange in my opinion that you hear parents not just here but other places to that say mine hit other children, but we have never smacked them in their lives.
So I guess you have to work out your own answers to your question.
These are just my views!
That would just be a cop out!
There is always someone else to blame, insted of admiting it is ones own fault. Why is everything always someone elses fault fgs. :shock:
I have heard it loads of times when a child has done something wrong....Not my little Johny, he is an angel. I would love to hear some of the teachers comments about kids " lashing out ". I can just imagine what some of the parents say to the teachers, and I bet it would end in off.
Kids do what they do because they can get away with it. Watch super nanny on the tv, with parents like that show highlight, is it any wonder the kids are out of control. And some of the Fathers on there are so spineless when dealing with the kids, it is sickening. Bottom line is the parents need to get a grip.
Sexlightened
Well said! Parenting is about being involved with the child/children and it's a form of abuse (honestly) to not have boundaries in place to guide that child through the early stages of their lives.
Quote by Bjlips2008
The boundaries should be laid within the first year of the child's life! Good parenting means that you have to get off your backside and actually be involved in setting boundaries and meaning them. So many people take the easier option of just letting children get away with so much poor behaviour...for the fear of possible tantrums that follow. Parenting is bloody tiring, but if you put some effort in..life is so much more peaceful, happier and calmer!!!
I wouldn't know what to do if the child was much, much older as it seems that maybe somehow respect had been lost or the child was harbouring a lot of anger or upset about something???
Orgasminator
I need to start by saying I don't have kids.
HOWEVER it isn't rocket science.
I've commented on lack of parenting skills before. I am often appalled by the lack of discipline from parents. They let their kids run riot.
I had my 2.5 year old niece to stay this weekend. She started throwing her dinner on the floor, throwing a tantrum and refused to eat it. First forkful went on the floor, I told her 'if you do that again, you go to your room' she did it again. So I sent her to her room. She cried, and screamed but I sent her up there for 3 minutes (one minute for every year of her life - cheers supernanny lol) She stopped crying when she realised I was serious and even said sorry when I went up there after. She ate all her dinner so I gave her a small piece of chocolate cake to finish.
It's not rocket science to teach your kids from the moment they can walk and talk who is boss. If you don't discipline your kids, who will?
*Her*
HOWEVER it isn't rocket science.
I've commented on lack of parenting skills before. I am often appalled by the lack of discipline from parents. They let their kids run riot.
I had my 2.5 year old niece to stay this weekend. She started throwing her dinner on the floor, throwing a tantrum and refused to eat it. First forkful went on the floor, I told her 'if you do that again, you go to your room' she did it again. So I sent her to her room. She cried, and screamed but I sent her up there for 3 minutes (one minute for every year of her life - cheers supernanny lol) She stopped crying when she realised I was serious and even said sorry when I went up there after. She ate all her dinner so I gave her a small piece of chocolate cake to finish.
It's not rocket science to teach your kids from the moment they can walk and talk who is boss. If you don't discipline your kids, who will?
*Her*
Sex God
I am not a parent. However, as someone who has spent some considerable time working with young people in both the education and youth justice systems, I feel like I can contribute.
It is extremely simplistic just to blame the parents.
Yes, there are worrying correlations between home life and behaviour, home life and educational attainment etc. If we trawled the research we could find plenty of stats to back up that argument.
Unfortunately though, there are many 'respectable' families who suffer these kind of problems. When you have a violent child - and I don't mean a kid that occasionally has a strop, but a physically and/or emotionally violent child - then simply blaming parents is not the answer.
I am not decrying some of the points that have been made about parenting skills and boundary-setting etc, what I am perhaps doing is trying to inject a note of caution and say that in a lot of cases like this it is so far from being a black and white, easy to apportion blame type of situation.
Just my opinion of course!
It is extremely simplistic just to blame the parents.
Yes, there are worrying correlations between home life and behaviour, home life and educational attainment etc. If we trawled the research we could find plenty of stats to back up that argument.
Unfortunately though, there are many 'respectable' families who suffer these kind of problems. When you have a violent child - and I don't mean a kid that occasionally has a strop, but a physically and/or emotionally violent child - then simply blaming parents is not the answer.
I am not decrying some of the points that have been made about parenting skills and boundary-setting etc, what I am perhaps doing is trying to inject a note of caution and say that in a lot of cases like this it is so far from being a black and white, easy to apportion blame type of situation.
Just my opinion of course!
