Why do males list on there profiles that they are looking for bi couples, str8 couples etc.
then in profile section about them selfs say they are str8, when you ask them why they say they are bi curious and always wanted to try,
Is it a male fantasy that they want to be bi or away of getting there leg over.
J n B
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I can honestly say that I have bi tendencies and don't mind couples with genuine bi guys. I haven't always been that way until an experience at a close friends one night. It mkes me right horny! 
Definitely a way of getting a leg over.
Oops, I shouldn't have given the game away, no, wasn't me, move along now, nothing to see here.
Seriously though, with me I guess it was a fantasy; couldn't get the idea out of my mind after turning down a threesome (yes I know, slap me with a wet haddock) with a girl and a gay bloke at university. Now I'm just a slapper so it's a bit of both.
Oops, I shouldn't have given the game away, no, wasn't me, move along now, nothing to see here.
Seriously though, with me I guess it was a fantasy; couldn't get the idea out of my mind after turning down a threesome (yes I know, slap me with a wet haddock) with a girl and a gay bloke at university. Now I'm just a slapper so it's a bit of both.
i'm sure we've just done this 
but ..........
one point to consider - maybe.
There are men on here, that have bisexual "tendancies" but prefer not to advertise the fact.
Why ? I hear you, in my head, ask (bewrae the voices Nell)
Well, there are a few men, half of a couple, whilst not being openly homophobic, would be reluctant to allow a bi man to join in a 3/moresome, for some irrational fear that the bi guest wouldn't be able to control the urge to cop a feel, or more.
i know this to be the case. For sure.
Now now.
remember - What you read between the lines is what's in your mind, not that of the author
but ..........
one point to consider - maybe.
There are men on here, that have bisexual "tendancies" but prefer not to advertise the fact.
Why ? I hear you, in my head, ask (bewrae the voices Nell)
Well, there are a few men, half of a couple, whilst not being openly homophobic, would be reluctant to allow a bi man to join in a 3/moresome, for some irrational fear that the bi guest wouldn't be able to control the urge to cop a feel, or more.
i know this to be the case. For sure.
Now now.
remember - What you read between the lines is what's in your mind, not that of the author
Quote by dambuster
There are men on here, that have bisexual "tendancies" but prefer not to advertise the fact.
Why ? I hear you, in my head, ask (bewrae the voices Nell)
Well, there are a few men, half of a couple, whilst not being openly homophobic, would be reluctant to allow a bi man to join in a 3/moresome, for some irrational fear that the bi guest wouldn't be able to control the urge to cop a feel, or more.
Good point!
There is also the point about labelling. Some people don't want to be labelled as bi-sexual as they don't think they fit that label - some even feel "why do I need a label anyway?"
I guess it has a lot to do with how you define bi-sexual. If we look at the definition of hetro or homosexual - I would define bi-sexual as being sexually attracted to either/both sex to the extent where forming a relationship with either sex is possible.
Now I am guessing that definition does not apply to may of the people who have labelled themselves as bi - I am certainly not bi-sexual by that definition, yet I ticked the bi-sexual box as it was the closest thing.
Just because you are liberated enought not to feel threatened by another cock or if the moment is right you are open to the idea of another man sucking you off (and vice versa) it does not a bi-sexual make.
So, labels can be difficult as sexuality is not always clear-cut.
Quote by JnBwelshcpl
Why do males list on there profiles that they are looking for bi couples, str8 couples etc.
then in profile section about them selfs say they are str8, when you ask them why they say they are bi curious and always wanted to try,
Is it a male fantasy that they want to be bi or away of getting there leg over.
J n B
99% of the time (and we speak for bitter experience) it's because they think once you meet they'll get a shag with the fem and the 'bi' bit will be forgotten....as you say, just a way of getting their 'leg over'.
Yes, there are some 'bi-curious' males out there who, for whatever reason, won't put it on their profile but, due to all the timewasters/chancers, we only ever meet a guy who says he is 'totally bi'. It might be harsh but life is too short to risk the 'fake bi' male.
Quote by PoloLady
There are men on here, that have bisexual "tendancies" but prefer not to advertise the fact.
Why ? I hear you, in my head, ask (bewrae the voices Nell)
Well, there are a few men, half of a couple, whilst not being openly homophobic, would be reluctant to allow a bi man to join in a 3/moresome, for some irrational fear that the bi guest wouldn't be able to control the urge to cop a feel, or more.
Good point!
There is also the point about labelling. Some people don't want to be labelled as bi-sexual as they don't think they fit that label - some even feel "why do I need a label anyway?"
I guess it has a lot to do with how you define bi-sexual. If we look at the definition of hetro or homosexual - I would define bi-sexual as being sexually attracted to either/both sex to the extent where forming a relationship with either sex is possible.
Now I am guessing that definition does not apply to may of the people who have labelled themselves as bi - I am certainly not bi-sexual by that definition, yet I ticked the bi-sexual box as it was the closest thing.
Just because you are liberated enought not to feel threatened by another cock or if the moment is right you are open to the idea of another man sucking you off (and vice versa) it does not a bi-sexual make.
So, labels can be difficult as sexuality is not always clear-cut.
The thing is you are totally right about labelling, as Micheal Stipe (of REM) once said 'I am neither homosexual or heterosexual, I am just sexual'.
However, when it comes to meeting people, as already said, we have had too many experiences with fakes to be willing to run the risk of chancing we have got a genuine one so, as already said, when we do meet males (or couples) it is only those who do say they are 'totally bi'.
when it comes to sexuality, I refer back to the theory that there's a line that starts with completely "straight" at one end and "gay" at the other... we all fit in our own little slots somewhere along that line. We're all different but we all fit on that line somewhere.
Our sexuality is ours alone to judge and we are all what we are.
Our sexuality is ours alone to judge and we are all what we are.
Quote by celestria
when it comes to sexuality, I refer back to the theory that there's a line that starts with completely "straight" at one end and "gay" at the other... we all fit in our own little slots somewhere along that line. We're all different but we all fit on that line somewhere.
Our sexuality is ours alone to judge and we are all what we are.
Bingo.
Orgasminator
I put it because I don't mind if the male half of a couple is bi and I've met bi-couples who have just been looking for straight sex.
I admit in exceptional circumstances I've had bi-sex with couples but it is not something I am actively seeking. Although open to the possibility I feel if I put myself down as a 'bi-male' there will be certain expectation of male sexual contact which is something I don't want........ not to mention the endless pm's from single guys
So whilst not 100% straight it's closer to what I am than bi.
I admit in exceptional circumstances I've had bi-sex with couples but it is not something I am actively seeking. Although open to the possibility I feel if I put myself down as a 'bi-male' there will be certain expectation of male sexual contact which is something I don't want........ not to mention the endless pm's from single guys
So whilst not 100% straight it's closer to what I am than bi.
Quote by PoloLady
when it comes to sexuality, I refer back to the theory that there's a line that starts with completely "straight" at one end and "gay" at the other... we all fit in our own little slots somewhere along that line. We're all different but we all fit on that line somewhere.
Our sexuality is ours alone to judge and we are all what we are.
Bingo.
Of course it is, no one with any sense should disagree. :D
The problem is, as the original poster has said, is with meets when you want to meet a male/couple who you know genuinely wants to play with both of you. So, the only way you can do this is just to go for the ones that say they are 'totally bi', as the risk of getting a straight male who just wants to shag to female is just too high (sadly)
Oh, how men are just meat - such joy to see :lol: :lol:
Sorry - I drifted there…
It just occurred to me, there have been a few suggestions that if a guy ticks a box he is ‘expected’ to deliver and he is nothing but a fake if they choose not to.
The thought that then followed this was….
I don’t care what boxes I have ticked… if I don’t feel like doing a particular thing at the time it isn’t happening.(note the big full-stop) And further more…. If someone suggested that because I had ticked a box, then I would be ‘expected’ to deliver a specific sexual act. I would have only one reply to the person or persons making this demand….
FUCK OFF!
But then again - I am a woman so I am allowed a choice (apparently)
:lol: :lol: Sorry - I drifted there…
It just occurred to me, there have been a few suggestions that if a guy ticks a box he is ‘expected’ to deliver and he is nothing but a fake if they choose not to.
The thought that then followed this was….
I don’t care what boxes I have ticked… if I don’t feel like doing a particular thing at the time it isn’t happening.(note the big full-stop) And further more…. If someone suggested that because I had ticked a box, then I would be ‘expected’ to deliver a specific sexual act. I would have only one reply to the person or persons making this demand….
FUCK OFF!
But then again - I am a woman so I am allowed a choice (apparently)
Quote by sussexguy
I put it because I don't mind if the male half of a couple is bi and I've met bi-couples who have just been looking for straight sex.
I admit in exceptional circumstances I've had bi-sex with couples but it is not something I am actively seeking. Although open to the possibility I feel if I put myself down as a 'bi-male' there will be certain expectation of male sexual contact which is something I don't want........ not to mention the endless pm's from single guys
So whilst not 100% straight it's closer to what I am than bi.
see, there is a genuine reason...............
well done my man for putting it so succinctly.......
my own personal view is that there are a whole spectrum of reasons why profiles/adverts etc contain the information that they do.... some sensible, others sinister...........
this is the same for those posted by both men and women, couples and singles.......
bi-sexuality is increasing in popularity and i dare say that many on the site are considering/experimenting/partaking.... and accordingly, there is no hard and fast answer. the above post is a clear example of this.
however, i think that the underlying problem is the sceptecism sourrounding fellow members as a whole................
a solution would be to take the information on board... but with a cretain pinch of salt and get to know people first .......... talk /PM/meet first and only play with those who youve got a chance to understand and that you feel are compatible with.
A " sex teacher" of mine once advised me that talking about sex is a great turn on for both sexes... a form of foreplay............. so enjoy the task of getting to know eachother first.... it leads to much better things...........
Quote by JnBwelshcpl
Why do males list on there profiles that they are looking for bi couples, str8 couples etc.
then in profile section about them selfs say they are str8, when you ask them why they say they are bi curious and always wanted to try,
Is it a male fantasy that they want to be bi or away of getting there leg over.
J n B
I saw your ad. yesterday in LMU and thought exactly the same to be honest. I was gonna reply but thought "it's none of my business". Your ad. was quite specific and yet the first two responses were still from 'straight' guys with 'medium' sized assets
Quote by redpantherman
let's go into FLIP MODE!!!
Why do females NOT list on their profiles that THEY like certain...'acts'
Because they like it 'sometimes' and have no wish to commit to having to do it all of the time.
It is back to avoiding the "you said you liked it - so I expect it" bollox.
Quote by redpantherman
let's go into FLIP MODE!!!
Why do females NOT list on their profiles that THEY like certain...'acts'
because if we do, we get bombarded with dodgy party invites/ guys who want to 'indulge' / random pm's from guys who see only what's on the list and nothing about the person herself????
also - we like some stuff with some people, and other stuff with others and sometimes half the fun comes from talking about what we like..... and maybe other times we like to keep our cards close to our chest
Quote by redpantherman
So it's ok for a female to in certain circumstances to say to the contrary but when a male does the same ...?
Why get the big sticks out?
Cannot a guy not have to commit to having to do it all of the time?
No soap box rant... just a debate
Right, so this would be a straight fem pretending to be bi so she could shag the male half of a bi couple then?
Fair enough, in theory, it could happen but has ANYONE ever heard of such a thing? In all our years of swinging can't say we ever have
If such a person existed, of course, it would be no more right than the 'fake' bi men, so, in theory, guess you have a point but can't see it ourselves
Quote by flidais-media
So it's ok for a female to in certain circumstances to say to the contrary but when a male does the same ...?
Why get the big sticks out?
Cannot a guy not have to commit to having to do it all of the time?
No soap box rant... just a debate
Right, so this would be a straight fem pretending to be bi so she could shag the male half of a bi couple then?
Fair enough, in theory, it could happen but has ANYONE ever heard of such a thing? In all our years of swinging can't say we ever have
If such a person existed, of course, it would be no more right than the 'fake' bi men, so, in theory, guess you have a point but can't see it ourselves
My dear friends flidais-media... at no time did I presume that a straight female would pretend to be anything in theory or otherwise which is why I don’t think anyone has heard of the situation you have just encapsulated. All I’ve done is raise the point that it’s perfectly ok for a female to change her mind but if a guy exercises the same right the hounds are let loose!
In this post all we can do is surmise…
If a guy is genuinely bi <we dont know for sure> but on a particular play night he chooses for what ever reason he does not want to engage in some gentlemen on gentlemen action why should he be blasted as a fraud?
If a female has it on her profile she likes certain activities but on a play night she chooses not to indulge… ???
We all have a reason for not doing certain things with certain people - that’s life in general why should it be any different in swinging?
Quote by redpantherman
So it's ok for a female to in certain circumstances to say to the contrary but when a male does the same ...?
Why get the big sticks out?
Cannot a guy not have to commit to having to do it all of the time?
No soap box rant... just a debate
Right, so this would be a straight fem pretending to be bi so she could shag the male half of a bi couple then?
Fair enough, in theory, it could happen but has ANYONE ever heard of such a thing? In all our years of swinging can't say we ever have
If such a person existed, of course, it would be no more right than the 'fake' bi men, so, in theory, guess you have a point but can't see it ourselves
My dear friends flidais-media... at no time did I presume that a straight female would pretend to be anything in theory or otherwise which is why I don’t think anyone has heard of the situation you have just encapsulated. All I’ve done is raise the point that it’s perfectly ok for a female to change her mind but if a guy exercises the same right the hounds are let loose!
In this post all we can do is surmise…
If a guy is genuinely bi <we dont know for sure> but on a particular play night he chooses for what ever reason he does not want to engage in some gentlemen on gentlemen action why should he be blasted as a fraud?
If a female has it on her profile she likes certain activities but on a play night she chooses not to indulge… ???
We all have a reason for not doing certain things with certain people - that’s life in general why should it be any different in swinging?
You asked about the 'contrary' situation and 'logically' that was the situation I described, a female pretending to be bi to shag the male half of a bi-couple.
Now, on the rest I totally agree with you, no-one is going to fancy everyone and someone may be genuinely bi but just not want to play with the same-sex member of the couple, that is understandable, it's even happened to us when Media wasn't taken to a bi-male that I had known for some time.
I can't speak for anyone else but all we do is just arrange to meet people who say they are 'totally bi' because, so many times, we (and many other we know) have been contacted by males who clearly say they are straight on all their profile, ads etc and, therefore, we have no reason to think otherwise when they suddenly say in a PM they are bi. The thing is, as many bi-couples will tell you, it happens so often that a male turns up and clearly is not in the slightest bit bi and never had any intention of being, it was just a ruse to get to the fem. The only way to stop this is to not meet them. Likewise, if we ever got contacted by a straight fem, who suddenly calimed to be bi, we wouldn't meet her either. So, to get to the point, it's not the sex of the person that matters but whether or not they say, on their profile, that they are bi.
We have chatted to males who say they are bi and have bi male on their profile, even confirmed it by a phone call, have arranged a meet and chat gone well and had fun playing and still turns out when it comes down to it they only want to play with fem half of cpl.
We had one nice male who did play and say he was bi curious, he played and we got the feeling he was not into it, He was good enough to contact us and say he had fun and thank you, but bi male fun was not for him, which was a nice gesture and yes we still chat to him.
So its not always what is left out or put in a profile that you can go by, so is it a lottery what type of person you chat to or meet.
J n B
We had one nice male who did play and say he was bi curious, he played and we got the feeling he was not into it, He was good enough to contact us and say he had fun and thank you, but bi male fun was not for him, which was a nice gesture and yes we still chat to him.
So its not always what is left out or put in a profile that you can go by, so is it a lottery what type of person you chat to or meet.
J n B
I think a lot of people here are assuming that a man who seeks to meet couples is bi and hiding it. Whilst it must be true in some cases there's also another explanation.
There are some couples who want to experience a threesome, in my case, a long time ago, my then partner wanted to have a threesome with me and another man. DP was one of the many weird and wonderful fantasies she had. So we looked for another man, straight, who didn't mind I'd be there. Neither him nor me were bi and we were happy about it. Since then I like the idea of being one of the men giving a woman a delightful DP.
I would happily meet couples now and I would definitely let them know that I'm straight and that I'm there for the DP experience.
Of course, if I knew that the man is bi and he expects some play then I wouldn't contact them in the first place.
It seems to me that some people tend to see ulterior motives in everything other people say. Sometimes the explanations can be very simple and boring.
There are some couples who want to experience a threesome, in my case, a long time ago, my then partner wanted to have a threesome with me and another man. DP was one of the many weird and wonderful fantasies she had. So we looked for another man, straight, who didn't mind I'd be there. Neither him nor me were bi and we were happy about it. Since then I like the idea of being one of the men giving a woman a delightful DP.
I would happily meet couples now and I would definitely let them know that I'm straight and that I'm there for the DP experience.
Of course, if I knew that the man is bi and he expects some play then I wouldn't contact them in the first place.
It seems to me that some people tend to see ulterior motives in everything other people say. Sometimes the explanations can be very simple and boring.
Quote by JnBwelshcpl
Why do males list on there profiles that they are looking for bi couples, str8 couples etc.
then in profile section about them selfs say they are str8, when you ask them why they say they are bi curious and always wanted to try,
Is it a male fantasy that they want to be bi or away of getting there leg over.
J n B
Though I am one myself, the male is a devious species and will do pretty much anything to satisfy their hunger (or greed for that matter). Most men do not fantasize about being Bi though think they should try it! I have tried it and found it one of the least erotic moments of my life... its not that I wasn't ready for it but it was like being a virgin again and really was an anti-climax (excuse the pun).
Moral is to be truthful and ask others who have genuinely tried it... I think they will turn you off the idea!
Quote by MrDarcy
Why do males list on there profiles that they are looking for bi couples, str8 couples etc.
then in profile section about them selfs say they are str8, when you ask them why they say they are bi curious and always wanted to try,
Is it a male fantasy that they want to be bi or away of getting there leg over.
J n B
Though I am one myself, the male is a devious species and will do pretty much anything to satisfy their hunger (or greed for that matter). Most men do not fantasize about being Bi though think they should try it! I have tried it and found it one of the least erotic moments of my life... its not that I wasn't ready for it but it was like being a virgin again and really was an anti-climax (excuse the pun).
Moral is to be truthful and ask others who have genuinely tried it... I think they will turn you off the idea!
Just as well it's not like that for all bi-curious men, Mr Darcy, or there would never be any :shock: (luckily there are
) 