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makingcocoa

Over 90 days ago

Bisexual Female, 41

UK

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13 Apr 2007

Quote by A+D
It's so very difficult for a newbie to break into any established group

I know what you mean, but believe me, this is the easiest-to-break-into group you could possibly imagine! Everyone was a newbie once, and everyone knows how scary it is, so people make a big effort to look after newbies and make them feel comfortable and welcome.
Besides which, the very nature of the group means that it's in everyone's best interests to be welcoming to new people, because without newbies joining all the time, the 'established' group would run out of new people to meet, chat to, and potentially play with! So everyone is very welcoming to newbies.
My main tip would be to make the first move to start a conversation, even if it's scary - say hello to the person standing next to you, tell them you're new, ask them about socials they've been to before, get chatting. And keep doing it, it gets easier with every friendly response!
Welcome to the forums, by the way, A+D smile

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wave

13 Apr 2007

Quote by A+D
It's so very difficult for a newbie to break into any established group

I know what you mean, but believe me, this is the easiest-to-break-into group you could possibly imagine! Everyone was a newbie once, and everyone knows how scary it is, so people make a big effort to look after newbies and make them feel comfortable and welcome.
Besides which, the very nature of the group means that it's in everyone's best interests to be welcoming to new people, because without newbies joining all the time, the 'established' group would run out of new people to meet, chat to, and potentially play with! So everyone is very welcoming to newbies.
My main tip would be to make the first move to start a conversation, even if it's scary - say hello to the person standing next to you, tell them you're new, ask them about socials they've been to before, get chatting. And keep doing it, it gets easier with every friendly response!
Welcome to the forums, by the way, A+D smile

smile

wave

13 Apr 2007

A few of mine: biggrin

biggrin

MMF, both guys bi. :twisted:
Strap-on fun, FF or FM.
Being tied up and blindfolded and teased achingly slowly to orgasm.
Being dominated by another woman.

12 Apr 2007

Quote by Darkfire
Oooh, I so know what you mean, Dark! Every now and then I notice a post and think 'Hmmm, I'm going to like this one' :rascal: x

OMG, how did I miss this! :shock: da Cocoa Darling ( lol

lol

) is back! passionkiss

passionkiss

God its good to see you! (where have you been, naughty girl smackbottom

smackbottom

)

silly

assionkiss:
I'm around, reading more than posting these days but I'm still here, promise! biggrin

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10 Apr 2007

Oooh, I so know what you mean, Dark! Every now and then I notice a post and think 'Hmmm, I'm going to like this one' :rascal: In fact, I think the last time I really strongly felt that about someone just from their posts was when DG started posting, so it's a pretty accurate sense sometimes too! biggrin

biggrin

kiss

I think for me it's mostly a certain way of expressing themselves, people who are articulate and literate and not afraid to use 'big words' lol

lol

, and who clearly think about what they're writing and how they're writing it, and who are 'words' people.
Having opinions without being opinionated, being humble and intelligent enough to occasionally let someone change their mind on something, not posting something just to be inflammatory but rather to further a debate. Sticking up for someone who's being picked on irrationally or unreasonably, even when they're the first voice of reason in the thread. (Laird is wonderful like that :inlove smile

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References to counselling terms and experiences always make me prick my ears up, because that's an area where I have a lot of interest and a little bit of experience. References to bands, books, festivals, places, films etc that I love (especially if they're quite unusual) are guaranteed to make me take notice.
Good thread, Dark, I'm enjoying reading the responses!
x

13 Mar 2007

I'm around, reading the forums when I can - just hardly ever have time to post. I like to hear everyone's news and keep up to date with what people are up to, and very occasionally a good discussion thread gets me interested enough to post.
Work's busy, and I've been spending quite a lot of time doing the 'settling into a new place' bit since I moved.... but TBH my lack of forum time is mostly to do with the fact that I'm living with Chris now, and blissfully happy, and more often than not, we're too busy chatting and giggling and snuggling and pottering around together, to do much posting. We'll never stop doing the socials and munches, and I keep up with reading newsy threads and posting on birthdays / congratulations etc, but I don't feel as keen to get involved in the general discussion and banter as I used to.
Whew, that was a bit honest! Wasn't meant to sound negative. Just... I'm happy, I guess, and busy being happy. If a side-effect of that is a slight drift away from the forums, I'm OK with that exchange. smile

smile

26 Feb 2007

Us please, for the guest list and the 'will help with whatever needs helping with' list biggrin

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x

13 Feb 2007

Laird -

passionkiss

Thank you, I was reading through this thread becoming more and more irritated with the reaction this poor guy has had, your post has saved me from posting something that would have been much ruder than yours!
Reggie, I apologise for the collective idiocy of most of the responses in this thread.
As far as your question - I think the decision is whether you're just interested in the 'ticking it off the list' kind of experience of having a threesome, in which case a prostitute makes sense and is probably a much easier and less time-consuming way than getting involved with the swinging community, getting to know people, finding a person who you both fancy and 'click' with and who fancies you as well... the swinging scene isn't a quick shag site. On the other hand, if what you're looking for is making swinging / group sex / involving other people in your sex life a regular thing, or if you're interested in the community, it is worth putting in the time and effort to get involved here.
The benefits of swinging - you know the other person actually wants YOU, not just your money. You know they are actually enjoying themselves rather than putting on a good show. You also have the potential for making some good friends, discovering a new social circle, having all sorts of experiences that expand your horizons in so many other ways than the purely sexual.
Personally, when I first toyed with the idea of a threesome (with an ex), we talked about prostitutes and I vetoed the idea because I didn't like the idea of paying someone to shag me, I would have found it uncomfortable. On the other hand, I can see that there's less risk of emotional involvement with a prostitute.
On that point, though - if the risk of emotional involvement / infidelity is a problem for you guys, you should probably have some serious chats before you think about swinging. No sexual experience is worth risking your relationship, and if swinging is going to make one or both of you horribly insecure or jealous, then steer clear and just keep doing what works for you.
Either way, welcome to the forums, and I hope you're not too badly put off by the pathetic response to this thread. evil

evil

Cocoa xxx

10 Feb 2007

Have a wonderful time everyone, wish we were coming! Give each other hugs n snogs from us biggrin

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Cocoa and Marmalaid xxx

4 Feb 2007

Happy birthday hotandwet, hope you had a fantastic time!
kiss

kiss

Cocoa and Marmalaid xxx

2 Feb 2007

Oooh, Celery, I love the fairylights-round-headboard thing as well, although Chris is rather anti the whole idea at the moment! I bought some lovely lights in Thailand and am keeping them hidden till he gets used to the idea :giggle:
We're making plans at the moment to redecorate the house, and we're starting with the bedroom, of course..... I'm going to keep an interested eye on the suggestions in this thread! (WW, we may end up with identical bedrooms biggrin

biggrin

)

29 Jan 2007

Quote by celestria
oooh that reminds me.... incoming pm

If it involves either (a) tarting (b) further plans for destruction of the futon or (c) the next time there's a 'do' at yours, can I have a PM too? :twisted: :rascal:

28 Jan 2007

Fantastic munch! Happy birthday Kaz, and thank you for all your hard work - thanks to all who helped with the organisation of last night, the DJs, the door bitches, sLeeper, everyone who helped with that fantastic buffet, it was all wonderful.
Big thanks and hugs n snogs to Celery and Fektart for putting us up for the weekend (sorry we didn't do a better job of destroying the futon :giggle smile

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and to Vicky and Bazza for being fab company, and for a trademark Vicky brekkie. biggrin

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It was fantastic to see everyone, our first munch of the year and we've missed you all! Will almost certainly miss someone important but.... Vix n Reese, happy anniversary, love you lots. Cali and Morbius, absolutely wonderful to see you both again, and looking so happy. kiss

kiss

Jas and Tim, DG, Wideboy, Dark (you looked fabulous, thanks for the chat, it was wonderful to catch up with you), Dammy and HLB (thanks for the Dammywisdom, much appreciated :kiss:), MikeC, Les & Den, my darling wife Sassy, Stuart & Tanina, Lep, Earthy & Will, Roger, Angel Chat, Kit & Kat, WBB (I have to give you your shoes back sometime!), Fabio (it's been absolutely ages!) - really great to see you all and lots of others, thanks all for hugs and chats and dances and karaoke and stuff.
Lovely to meet some newbies, sorry we've forgotten peoples' names but it was lovely to chat to you, hope you all had a good first munch!
lots of love
Cocoa and Marmalaid xxx

24 Jan 2007

So sorry to hear this awful news - Mids, we're so very sorry for your loss. Can't even begin to imagine how you're feeling - our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Cocoa and Marmalaid x

24 Jan 2007

:giggle:

16 Jan 2007

Sorry sorry sorry! We've just got back from Thailand to find lots of texts and PMs telling us we're late confirming and to get our arses into this thead NOW..... we're here now, can we confirm please? biggrin

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kiss

Cocoa and Marmalaid xxx

27 Nov 2006

Awwwww, thank you FA!!!! biggrin

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kiss

And thanks SO much for my wonderful present, and I can't wait to see you in a couple of weeks to celebrate properly! :D
And thanks everyone else, I'm having a lovely birthday so far!!!
xxx

22 Nov 2006

Boobs on ladies, bums and shoulders on blokes, eyes and grins on both. Legs I only ever ogle if they're particularly good ones, and wearing nice boots.

22 Nov 2006

:therethere: Earthy.... hope you feel better soon, honey!
I hatebeing ill, I drive everyone around me mad because I whine on and on about it and feel incredibly sorry for myself! Man-flu has nothing on Cocoa-flu.
I usually wrap up in dressing gown and slippers, curl up under a duvet in front of the TV and watch back-to-back episodes of Friends and Will & Grace, drink Lemsip and sleep lots. And burst into tears at the slightest provocation, and if anyone is silly enough to come near me, whine at them about how ill I feel until they make their excuses and leave lol

lol

22 Nov 2006

Wife!!!!!

passionkiss

22 Nov 2006

Bugger off both of ya lol

lol

It's nearly my birthday and then it's nearly Christmas and I'm sitting here posting on the forums and watching Chris put together IKEA stuff and I have pretty sparkly baubles and everything is lovely.
:inlove: biggrin

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:D :D :D :D :D :D :D
:giggle:
*fluff, fluff, pinkety pinkety fluff*

22 Nov 2006

Quote by meat2pleaseu
(featuring the lovechild of Dino & Devon1, pictured right)

rotflmao

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

22 Nov 2006

passionkiss

to the refugees, and silly

silly

assionkiss: to the SH regs, and general peace love n :passionkiss:s all round! I bought my first Christmas decorations today, I'm feeling all happy and lovey-dovey.
And scuse the quick hijack, but just a quick note to a few of my friends.... if you're planning on celebrating my birthday with me soonish, don't panic, it's still happening and I have all your email addresses / phone numbers, I'll be in touch soon either by PM here, phone or email!
x

21 Nov 2006

Yay!!!!! :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:
So happy for you both, this is fantastic news. Well done Morbius, hope you enjoy the new job!!!
xxx

19 Nov 2006

rotflmao

Fabulous, Dark!!!!!!

19 Nov 2006

Well, I'm totally normal and have absolutely no weird foibles. At all. biggrin

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Chris, on the other hand... loon

loon

Towels and teatowels have to be folded with no edges showing.
Shirts, trousers and jumpers get folded around the chessboard so they're perfect squares before going on the shelf.
Socks don't get rolled up in pairs, they get folded and then one half pulled down over the other, so they stack better in the drawer.
Text messages don't stay in the Inbox, they get filed into folders by sender. People who text him lots have different folders for different months.
Shampoo and conditioner bottles cannot be left open, and if he finds any that have been left open and got clogged up, he takes them apart and unclogs them.
:inlove:

1 Nov 2006

Quote by the_Laird
Did it have an open log fire and a big comfy rug Minxy???

Open log fire, big comfy rug, Laird and Minxy.
I wanna get in this room!!!!
:rascal: :twisted:
(By the way, passionkiss

passionkiss

both... haven't seen either of you for a while, love ya, miss ya!)

26 Oct 2006

Nicolas Cage as Captain Corelli.... everything about that film was WRONG, but he was the wrongest thing about it!

25 Oct 2006

Happy birthday darling!
Lots of love from both of us xxx

25 Oct 2006

You never know till you try! Personally I would never go to a party organised by someone I don't already know, but there are lots of people here and you might find people who do want to come along. My advice would be to post here in LMU, but do it with LOTS of detail - about yourself, mostly, so that people get a good sense of who you are, but also about the party (dates, area, and what you're expecting to happen and why your party would be worth coming to smile

smile

)
If you don't get a good response, come and spend some time joining in with threads in the Lounge, come along to a social, and once you know some people you'll probably find it much easier to organise a party.
HTH
Cocoa x