Etiquette

13 Apr 2008

So,
I have been pondering something for a little while now, how do you view the whole matter of sexual etiquette when with a new partner.
Of course, setting out your gambit at the commencement of any interaction negates a lot of embarassing moments, but what if for example your (new)partner decides to do something spur of the moment! How should one react?
I give for your consideration, someone spitting in my mouth unexpectedly, I reacted well humouredly but the moment was undoubtedly lost, where does one draw the line between spontaneous and something which is mood crushing!
How to handle this?

13 Apr 2008

Quote by ambervixen
I give for your consideration, someone spitting in my mouth unexpectedly, I reacted well humouredly but the moment was undoubtedly lost, where does one draw the line between spontaneous and something which is mood crushing!
How to handle this?

A kick in the crown jewels, and the door hitting his arse on the way out
He is such class

13 Apr 2008

Spitting? Ewwww confused

I'd have told him to sod off and then I'd have got dressed!

13 Apr 2008

He'd have had his fecking tongue bitten off. mad

Subwench

13 Apr 2008

Ok so it's not just me, that really does step over the line!?!?
I mean I've played with some rather odd people but this really shocked me, I didn't react badly but then I am fairly relaxed and open minded.
Did think it would be have been polite to ask before doing it though...
I think this person in particular is rather darker than he like to let on, don't mind playing roughly / different but I like to be asked first!!
Rubbing semen on to my stomach also struck me as rather unecessary...

13 Apr 2008

ewww spitting....im with you on this one amber....a guy I was playing with spit on my pussy without asking....to say I was rather taken aback was an uderstatement :shock: O know diferent strokes for different folks and all that, but something as personal as that definately needs some common courtsey IMHO.

13 Apr 2008

Sounds like he`s been watching too many porno`s where they do alot of spitting and thinks it`s the way to go!
I dunno how guys can think this is horny....it`s not!
I`d have kicked him out and stopped all proceedings there and then!

13 Apr 2008

Totally with you on that one!! It's rather intimate and needs to be discussed ( I had a guy spit on my ass) SERIOUSLY what is it about!!
Maybe there should be a 'to spit or not to spit' button on our profiles... smile

13 Apr 2008

Quote by essex34m

I give for your consideration, someone spitting in my mouth unexpectedly, I reacted well humouredly but the moment was undoubtedly lost, where does one draw the line between spontaneous and something which is mood crushing!
How to handle this?

A kick in the crown jewels, and the door hitting his arse on the way out
He is such class
Succinct and correct

13 Apr 2008

I suppose it depends (for me) how the rest of the night was going.
If it was otherwise a lovely night, I'd be tempted to say something along the lines of "Ooh that was unusual, bit too adventurous for me, though..." to save the fella's feelings.
I mean, any of us could make a mistake on something that hadn't been discussed before hand, and if it was something the fella's previous partner had found erotic, he might have thought he was adding to the occasion.

13 Apr 2008

Quote by Cherrytree
I suppose it depends (for me) how the rest of the night was going.
If it was otherwise a lovely night, I'd be tempted to say something along the lines of "Ooh that was unusual, bit too adventurous for me, though..." to save the fella's feelings.
I mean, any of us could make a mistake on something that hadn't been discussed before hand, and if it was something the fella's previous partner had found erotic, he might have thought he was adding to the occasion.

Do you reckon cherry? I think that 'gobbing' into another's mouth is not a normal state of affairs unless your sure of the others openness to do that. I know i'm not the most adventurous soul in the world but at an initial sex event I would of thought that knowing the person was ok with it would be paramount.
Spitting isn't what i would call a normal practice between two new lovers.
I suppose in saying that though. it mat depend on how the 'session' had gone up to then. If it was quite 'experimental' I suppose i could give it more credence.

13 Apr 2008

Quote by Lost
I suppose it depends (for me) how the rest of the night was going.
If it was otherwise a lovely night, I'd be tempted to say something along the lines of "Ooh that was unusual, bit too adventurous for me, though..." to save the fella's feelings.
I mean, any of us could make a mistake on something that hadn't been discussed before hand, and if it was something the fella's previous partner had found erotic, he might have thought he was adding to the occasion.

Do you reckon cherry? I think that 'gobbing' into another's mouth is not a normal state of affairs unless your sure of the others openness to do that. I know i'm not the most adventurous soul in the world but at an initial sex event I would of thought that knowing the person was ok with it would be paramount.
Spitting isn't what i would call a normal practice between two new lovers.
I suppose in saying that though. it mat depend on how the 'session' had gone up to then. If it was quite 'experimental' I suppose i could give it more credence.
I think there are a lot of things that, to a lot of people, are "not a normal state of affairs".
The important thing for me, would be if it was not done intentionally to demean (is that the right word?) the "recipient", well I think handling someone's feelings with care is the thing to do.
Afterall, I'm assuming a guy who's enjoying himself with a lady wouldn't intentionally do something to end the session abruptly (ie by being thrown out).
As I said at the beginning, it would depend how the rest of the meeting had gone up to then. If the spitting was the last straw in a meet that had been bordering on abusive, well yes then it has a totally different timbre. But I would have stopped it before then anyway.
But I got the impression in the opening post, that this was an act that the spitter felt was erotic. I wasn't imagining a huge glob of phlegm.

13 Apr 2008

did he hoik?
lp

13 Apr 2008

Quote by Cherrytree
I suppose it depends (for me) how the rest of the night was going.
If it was otherwise a lovely night, I'd be tempted to say something along the lines of "Ooh that was unusual, bit too adventurous for me, though..." to save the fella's feelings.
I mean, any of us could make a mistake on something that hadn't been discussed before hand, and if it was something the fella's previous partner had found erotic, he might have thought he was adding to the occasion.

Do you reckon cherry? I think that 'gobbing' into another's mouth is not a normal state of affairs unless your sure of the others openness to do that. I know i'm not the most adventurous soul in the world but at an initial sex event I would of thought that knowing the person was ok with it would be paramount.
Spitting isn't what i would call a normal practice between two new lovers.
I suppose in saying that though. it mat depend on how the 'session' had gone up to then. If it was quite 'experimental' I suppose i could give it more credence.
I think there are a lot of things that, to a lot of people, are "not a normal state of affairs".
The important thing for me, would be if it was not done intentionally to demean (is that the right word?) the "recipient", well I think handling someone's feelings with care is the thing to do.
Afterall, I'm assuming a guy who's enjoying himself with a lady wouldn't intentionally do something to end the session abruptly (ie by being thrown out).
As I said at the beginning, it would depend how the rest of the meeting had gone up to then. If the spitting was the last straw in a meet that had been bordering on abusive, well yes then it has a totally different timbre. But I would have stopped it before then anyway.
But I got the impression in the opening post, that this was an act that the spitter felt was erotic. I wasn't imagining a huge glob of phlegm.
Yeah I guess i can see your point Cherry. I must admit a glob of phlegm wasn't what i was imagining either :shock: surprised

I suppose if the meet had gone well enough to the point at which the person was comfortable enough to spit. That might be testament to how well things had gone and a compliment. Quite hard imagining myself ever doing such a thing though.

13 Apr 2008

Quote by __random_orbit__
did he hoik?
lp

:rotflmao:
You are naughty!
smackbottom

13 Apr 2008

How rude :spit:

13 Apr 2008

Quote by __random_orbit__
did he hoik?
lp

ewwwwwwwww wheres mi sick bucket
Lp Baaaaad man smackbottom

14 Apr 2008

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! I really hate spitting, but spitting into someone's mouth is extremely rude without finding out if they mind or not.
Personally the whole idea makes me feel sick.
:fuckinghell:

14 Apr 2008

Quote by ambervixen
I give for your consideration, someone spitting in my mouth unexpectedly

Had he done that to my partner the next time he spat it would have been his teeth onto the floor.

14 Apr 2008

This certainly seems to have got people feeling passionate !
I agree with Cherrytree, it total depends on how the session was going; whether you have that heat going on. I have both spat and been spat on during sex, i dont do it all the time and i dont do it with everyone but sometimes -when things are intense- it's totally horny. And yes, I am just talking about salivia and not any chewable extras in the spit rolleyes

hehehe
I also dont have a problem with cum on my body (as long as it doesn't go onto my pussy). So maybe i'm more dirty that i realised ... i dunnno
Anyway, I think that Cherrytree is right in saying that a lot of things are not considered "a normal state of affairs" by many people. I hope that as members of a sexually liberated and emancipated site, we can all respect each other's preferences without passing judgement or prejudice.
Have fun !
Trix xxx

14 Apr 2008

It's another no from me eeeeeewwwwwwwww!!!!
I would have puked and I havnt done that for 20 years!!!!

14 Apr 2008

i have to admit to getting really turned on by a guy cumming on my body redface

ops: :oops:
what floats someones boat will sink anothers raft without trace biggrin

14 Apr 2008

Hornet's Nest!!
I think that it took me aback at the time, the rest of the meet had indeed gone well and all was much fun, but it seemed like a very presumptuous thing to do at the time, and rather out of character with the rest of the meet.
If I'm with someone and playing it a bit more 'rough' then paramaters are set at the commencement of the activity, and this would involve a clear line on no 'spitting'.
It's one thing when something (ahem) lands on your body, that's simpler to handle, and no I didn't check for consistency. I ran to the bathroom rather swiftly and cleaned my teeth.
I did make it clear that it was completely not my thing, though the mood was definately lost after that.
I think though that from what has been written that I'm right in thinking that this is not something that you go ahead and do without some degree of consultation. Evidently when you are with a new partner and in a new situation I think that there has to be a degree of room allowed for mistakes, I myself have initiated activities that have not floated other partners' boats and I will always respect this.
I guess it raises an interesting question, when commencing to play with a new partner is it really advisable to set the entire paramaters of your sexual proclivities out in a detailed manner, coming armed with a list of do's and don'ts. Within reason I do, as in what is totally out, perhaps I should just add this to my list.
I think I'm with Cherry on the fact that you have to handle the situation upon the merits of the preceding interaction, this person is all smooth on the surface but as my initial impression informed me a little more on the dark side than he likes to display. Having said that he took it well, probably because I didn't batter him.
It leaves me with a degree of hesitation though.
I think the message seems to be not without asking. I think that there are varying degrees of playing, each with their own mood, and in light of such interaction you need to be clear on what is in and what is out, but how can you be so clinical when attempting to established relaxed and fun sessions... biggrin

14 Apr 2008

Quote by bbw_lover
spitting into someone's mouth is extremely rude without finding out if they mind or not.
:fuckinghell:

Well.....
do you mind or not? :giggle:

15 Apr 2008

You could've said 'Why don't I go on top fer a minute.'
And then phlobbed it back at him and see how he liked it. :twisted:
.

15 Apr 2008

Quote by westerross
You could've said 'Why don't I go on top fer a minute.'
And then phlobbed it back at him and see how he liked it. :twisted:
.

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: this tickled me.
Seriously tho I would have probably vomited it back all over him!! :uhoh:

15 Apr 2008

Quote by helnheaven
spitting into someone's mouth is extremely rude without finding out if they mind or not.
:fuckinghell:

Well.....
do you mind or not? :giggle:
Naughty girl!

:smackbottom: :smackbottom:

15 Apr 2008

Quote by bbw_lover
Naughty girl!
:smackbottom: :smackbottom:

Who's spreading these rumours? :giggle:

15 Apr 2008

Quote by westerross
You could've said 'Why don't I go on top fer a minute.'
And then phlobbed it back at him and see how he liked it. :twisted:
.

:laughabove:
I would have found it absolutely, totally & completely unacceptable - it is gross! :uhoh:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

16 Apr 2008

Quote by ambervixen
I give for your consideration, someone spitting in my mouth unexpectedly, I reacted well humouredly but the moment was undoubtedly lost, where does one draw the line between spontaneous and something which is mood crushing!
How to handle this?

Very easily handled imo, don't make plans to see him again and explain exactly why. If the guy thinks spitting in someones mouth is sexy, he needs all the help and advice he can get! confused