us two personaly dont want our faces shown just in the upchance some one recognises us, part from in the brief webcam shows. but in profile pics i would rather not.
but alot of people seem notto care just a question how would u react if u where recognised. please dont take this as a offence its more curious.
i see it two ways
1 the only people who will see it is like minded people.
2 some no pic perves giving it abuse if u get me.
thanks for reading
Fraggle
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Warming the Bed
We cover most of our faces in our profile, and have full face pics in our private gallery.
That said we go on cam quite often and show our faces, and lots more besides so I am not sure why we bother with the private gallery..........
As to being recognised, we decided that neither of us cares, so if / when it happens we will go from there.
Neither of us have a job that it would affect, I think this is one of the main worries for people, police, teachers, youth workers etc, and I can understand some women being concerned becouse some men can be complete twats and will just cause them hastle because they obviously are up for it !!!!!
Familly finding out via someone seeing us could be interesting, but if it happens we will deal with it.
Finished waffling now...............
That said we go on cam quite often and show our faces, and lots more besides so I am not sure why we bother with the private gallery..........
As to being recognised, we decided that neither of us cares, so if / when it happens we will go from there.
Neither of us have a job that it would affect, I think this is one of the main worries for people, police, teachers, youth workers etc, and I can understand some women being concerned becouse some men can be complete twats and will just cause them hastle because they obviously are up for it !!!!!
Familly finding out via someone seeing us could be interesting, but if it happens we will deal with it.
Finished waffling now...............
Sexlightened
We dont show our faces on here purely because we do not want to be recognised by anyone too local to us. It would affect our work and our family. We do appear on cam occasionally, but chose generally not to show faces, unless genereally its peeps we've already met are watching.
On saying that, mrs Adi was recognised by her arms ffs, mind you , the lady that recognised us is now working for us. :P In fact, its made the working environment really relaxed .
On saying that, mrs Adi was recognised by her arms ffs, mind you , the lady that recognised us is now working for us. :P In fact, its made the working environment really relaxed .
Warming the Bed
I have face pics on my profile and full body shots (clothed/unclothed) on my profile through choice.
Im very outgoing and make no secret of my private life within my friends and family and close work mates,so its no big deal for me .
I gave up making stories up about where and what was taking up so much of my time (meets, socials, munchies ect).So decieded to come clean ,and lucky enough everyone understood .
Also another bonus is i never have to send out pics anymore as i have enough for anyone to see for themselfs to decide weither they want to go further (or not).
Im very outgoing and make no secret of my private life within my friends and family and close work mates,so its no big deal for me .
I gave up making stories up about where and what was taking up so much of my time (meets, socials, munchies ect).So decieded to come clean ,and lucky enough everyone understood .
Also another bonus is i never have to send out pics anymore as i have enough for anyone to see for themselfs to decide weither they want to go further (or not).
Neither of us have a job that it would affect, I think this is one of the main worries for people, police, teachers, youth workers etc, and I can understand some women being concerned becouse some men can be complete twats and will just cause them hastle because they obviously are up for it !!!!!quote]
I came in under one of the above so decided to take my face pic down, even tho I had it in the private gallery. They had been a issue here in Bristol to do with one of the above jobs and what he was doing in his spare time, he was slaughtered for it publicly!!
I didn't concern myself with what my colleagues thought or knww etc its the upstanding community who would see more than there is into it! Plus doesnt make me out to be a good role model!
I also got a little fed up of being asked all the time to show any pics I might have from someone whose first sentence always starts with *can I*...blah blah blah
So I took the lot down!
Lulu, great that you can do that and your life is open... good for you
:)
You have to go with what you feel comfortable with...:smile:
xanaisx
I came in under one of the above so decided to take my face pic down, even tho I had it in the private gallery. They had been a issue here in Bristol to do with one of the above jobs and what he was doing in his spare time, he was slaughtered for it publicly!!
I didn't concern myself with what my colleagues thought or knww etc its the upstanding community who would see more than there is into it! Plus doesnt make me out to be a good role model!
I also got a little fed up of being asked all the time to show any pics I might have from someone whose first sentence always starts with *can I*...blah blah blah
So I took the lot down! Lulu, great that you can do that and your life is open... good for you
:) You have to go with what you feel comfortable with...:smile:
xanaisx
Sexlightened
hi there, we've got face pics up to show we are genuine and unashamed, but having said that it also depends on how much people have to lose by being recognised. at the end of the day we'd rather see a few pics, face or no face, than all the empty profiles we keep coming across. and your pics are quite lovely frags
Sexlightened
why not put your faces?
you are advertising your selfs? personaly when looking at ads or profiles if its just pictures of the fem or no face pics we don't go no further.
why, we cannot judge a person by just a body shot.
so if you get spotted by people at work so what, we have been spotted, by one guy at John's work. John's comment is what you doing on this website and secondly so what.
"what we do in our personal life is nothing to do with you!"
so thats how it ended.
you are advertising your selfs? personaly when looking at ads or profiles if its just pictures of the fem or no face pics we don't go no further.
why, we cannot judge a person by just a body shot.
so if you get spotted by people at work so what, we have been spotted, by one guy at John's work. John's comment is what you doing on this website and secondly so what.
"what we do in our personal life is nothing to do with you!"
so thats how it ended.
thanks for all teh reply's and quie a mixed response.
Personaly we will be leaving our faces off, yes we are advertising ourselfs to people but also want to choose who we would like to see us, me with my job and the wife's with hers could put minor jeaopordy there. Wish i could openly put pics up but for know will send them to poeple we wish to meet.
Thanks all
Fraggle
Personaly we will be leaving our faces off, yes we are advertising ourselfs to people but also want to choose who we would like to see us, me with my job and the wife's with hers could put minor jeaopordy there. Wish i could openly put pics up but for know will send them to poeple we wish to meet.
Thanks all
Fraggle
Orgasminator
I don't see why everyone is so obsessed with seeing face pics. You can get a good enough idea of someone by seeing a photo with head turned away. I also don't understand why loads of couples ads only have pics of the lady. I want to see the men too!
Warming the Bed
Face or no face dont bother me personally but i get frustrated at no text or detail in a profile. Pictures on here tend to b for titilation purposes either for the viewer or the ppl who post them mine are included in that vein. I think its all down to personal preference as to displaying a face pic or not.
Forum Virgin
My first post on here and I am beginning to fear it may be a contentious one.... but here goes.
When it comes to the subject of putting face pics on profiles I would almost go as far as to say the site admin should make it compulsory in the site rules... hear me out...
As "swingers" (I hate that word, but hey..) we enage in sexual activity that is, on the whole, not considered normal. Abnormal only in that we are honest to ourselves and our partners about what we do - look around, all the non-swingers are shagging each other left, right and centre, they're just lying to their partners about the fact, but I digress. However, if you look at the profiles on this and other sites you will notice that everybody is at it. People from all walks of life, all backgrounds, all creeds and religions are represented, and I'm willing to bet there are loads more that don't advertise. My point is that though what we do may not be "considered" normal, in actuality it is normal (in as much as that word means anything) to be non-monogamous. What the hell has this got to do with face pics?
Well, every time we hide our behaviour and/or identity it is like admitting to ourselves as well as sending the subtle message to others that there is something not quite right about what we are doing. Does anybody on this site truly feel naughty for engaging in their nocturnal (and frequently diurnal) activities? We certainly don't.
Surely if there is nothing wrong with what we are doing then we should not be exhibiting any shame behaviour at all and should in fact be proud of who we are? I know many will argue about job security and public reaction and the like but in retort I would like to draw your attention to the shift in public reaction to homosexuality since the Pride marches started. If we act shameful the public will always react scornful, by acting shamefully we give them the idea we are doing something wrong in the first place.
Told you it would be a contentious post....
And it hasn't finished yet either....
Because my second point also needs to be examined, and that is it makes for some bloody awkward moments where there need be none. Many times we contact or are contacted by people with no face pics on their profile and we will enter into an exchange. Then face pics will be sent and we will realise that, shall we say, no attraction exists for one or other of us. Now we aren't shallow people, surely this post demonstrates as much, and so while personality can make the plainest people look like gods and goddesses for some of us it just...er...can't! Sorry! At this point we are forced into the situation where, despite their protests to the contrary, we know we are hurting someones feelings. Do you follow me? This is an unecessary awkwardness that could so easily be avoided.
But anyway, I'm bored to tears from typing all this drivel so I can only imagine how anyone unfortunate enough to read it all must feel so I'll stop.
Bye for now
Matt
(Stella would never type this much crap)
When it comes to the subject of putting face pics on profiles I would almost go as far as to say the site admin should make it compulsory in the site rules... hear me out...
As "swingers" (I hate that word, but hey..) we enage in sexual activity that is, on the whole, not considered normal. Abnormal only in that we are honest to ourselves and our partners about what we do - look around, all the non-swingers are shagging each other left, right and centre, they're just lying to their partners about the fact, but I digress. However, if you look at the profiles on this and other sites you will notice that everybody is at it. People from all walks of life, all backgrounds, all creeds and religions are represented, and I'm willing to bet there are loads more that don't advertise. My point is that though what we do may not be "considered" normal, in actuality it is normal (in as much as that word means anything) to be non-monogamous. What the hell has this got to do with face pics?
Well, every time we hide our behaviour and/or identity it is like admitting to ourselves as well as sending the subtle message to others that there is something not quite right about what we are doing. Does anybody on this site truly feel naughty for engaging in their nocturnal (and frequently diurnal) activities? We certainly don't.
Surely if there is nothing wrong with what we are doing then we should not be exhibiting any shame behaviour at all and should in fact be proud of who we are? I know many will argue about job security and public reaction and the like but in retort I would like to draw your attention to the shift in public reaction to homosexuality since the Pride marches started. If we act shameful the public will always react scornful, by acting shamefully we give them the idea we are doing something wrong in the first place.
Told you it would be a contentious post....
And it hasn't finished yet either....
Because my second point also needs to be examined, and that is it makes for some bloody awkward moments where there need be none. Many times we contact or are contacted by people with no face pics on their profile and we will enter into an exchange. Then face pics will be sent and we will realise that, shall we say, no attraction exists for one or other of us. Now we aren't shallow people, surely this post demonstrates as much, and so while personality can make the plainest people look like gods and goddesses for some of us it just...er...can't! Sorry! At this point we are forced into the situation where, despite their protests to the contrary, we know we are hurting someones feelings. Do you follow me? This is an unecessary awkwardness that could so easily be avoided.
But anyway, I'm bored to tears from typing all this drivel so I can only imagine how anyone unfortunate enough to read it all must feel so I'll stop.
Bye for now
Matt
(Stella would never type this much crap)
Sex God
Hi Tantric
The only issue you did'nt address as far as I can see is the issue that many people have jobs or worse whole careers they can not afford to lose if they are found to be swingers. Therefore they don't show their faces until they trust the person they are showing.
Fire x
The only issue you did'nt address as far as I can see is the issue that many people have jobs or worse whole careers they can not afford to lose if they are found to be swingers. Therefore they don't show their faces until they trust the person they are showing.
Fire x
People don't put pictures on profiles for many reasons.
If they were recognised:
*they could lose their jobs,
*they could greatly offend members of their family,
*they could bring ridicule on their children at school,
*they could allow public access to parts of their life that they wish to keep private ...
But then again, maybe they just don't want to.
If they were recognised:
*they could lose their jobs,
*they could greatly offend members of their family,
*they could bring ridicule on their children at school,
*they could allow public access to parts of their life that they wish to keep private ...
But then again, maybe they just don't want to.
Forum Virgin
Quote by firelizard
Hi Tantric
The only issue you did'nt address as far as I can see is the issue that many people have jobs or worse whole careers they can not afford to lose if they are found to be swingers. Therefore they don't show their faces until they trust the person they are showing.
Fire x
Hi fire,
The paragraph, and apologies if you missed it in the midst of such a tome, that talked of job security and public reaction is where I attempted to address that idea. If we all behave like it's normal we aren't likely to get sacked for it.
Incidentally I'm genuinely curious here, what professions are we talking about? I can't think of any jobs where a genuine case for dismissal could be made on the grounds that someone was a swinger. If people have lost jobs this way then I hope to (pick a deity, I'm not fussy) they challenged this and pushed through an unfair dismissal claim. Let's face it you don't get sacked for having an affair and at the end of the day the only difference is we're honest and not prone to deceit - commendable qualities in an employee, wouldn't you say?
;)
Matt
Sex God
Quote by Tantric_Obstacles
Hi Tantric
The only issue you did'nt address as far as I can see is the issue that many people have jobs or worse whole careers they can not afford to lose if they are found to be swingers. Therefore they don't show their faces until they trust the person they are showing.
Fire x
Hi fire,
The paragraph, and apologies if you missed it in the midst of such a tome, that talked of job security and public reaction is where I attempted to address that idea. If we all behave like it's normal we aren't likely to get sacked for it.
Incidentally I'm genuinely curious here, what professions are we talking about? I can't think of any jobs where a genuine case for dismissal could be made on the grounds that someone was a swinger. If people have lost jobs this way then I hope to (pick a deity, I'm not fussy) they challenged this and pushed through an unfair dismissal claim. Let's face it you don't get sacked for having an affair and at the end of the day the only difference is we're honest and not prone to deceit - commendable qualities in an employee, wouldn't you say?
;)
Matt
Someone very recently posted in here about a member of the caring profession who lost their job because of their outside work curriculum. The person who owns the company I work for is a strict catholic and would not care how many people said the lifestyle is normal. It isnt to him and I would almost certainly be told my services were no longer required. It would be seen as as me bringing disrepute to the company they have fought long and hard to make successful and I have to say I do see their point of view. I stay private out of respect for them and my children and close family (well other than my Mum that is
she got here before me) I know what you mean tantric. In an ideal world etc etc. People can’t get sacked for ‘having an affair’. They can get sacked for contravening a clause that is often in contracts nowadays.. something along the line of bringing their employer into disrepute.. I can’t remember the exact clause. (there maybe some kind soul along who will elaborate). The wording is deliberately subjective so can be implemented at will. I know of a friend who lost a member of his team when her phone was picked up by a pupil and her private intimate photos were ‘bluetoothed’ in 3 mins to his phone and then sent all around the school. The clause was implemented and she will be lucky to work with children again in a teaching capacity. Essentially her images were stolen.
It is alright for those who are able to be activists for ‘the cause’ they can activate away. For those that are unable to we should be supportive. As a young gay woman (as I was at the time – long story) I lost a job because of my sexuality. It wasn’t illegal at that time to be sacked because of sexuality. It isn’t something I would wish on anyone. It did kick start a long and illustrious? career in being an activist. I argued publicly points that my friends who were teachers, a vicar, a politician, a lawyer were unable to argue anywhere else but over my dining table.
I don’t put my picture on my profile not because my swinging life is private to anyone. It is not. My boss and colleagues know (they love all the stories) my partner knows (of course), my friends know, my son knows – to a point (he is 14 and knows that my partner and I are non-monogamous). I don’t have my picture on my profile because I can’t be bothered to be approached by someone who has found it on the site somewhere and thinks that I might want to be propositioned in freshcos or other inappropriate venue or even at all. I don’t have my picture on here because there are nutters on here just as there are in real life. I know that because I have an ignore list full of them.
I am totally unashamed about what I do. But I am also not about to go and bang the drum about my private life. In business meetings and appointments I wouldn’t announce any detail about my sex life as it is essentially private. I reserve the right to keep it private in every arena I chose. For those reasons I don’t have a face picture that it is instantly accessible. If anyone wants to see me they are welcome to view my face on cam in a chatroom. I am often seen smiling and laughing on cam. I show nothing except my face. I am a prude like that. (again I show nothing else as I am aware that there is software that can copy my cam and I would never want my images to appear attached to anything my son may see.- bless him he would be scarred for life) Right I shall shush now.
splendid
It is alright for those who are able to be activists for ‘the cause’ they can activate away. For those that are unable to we should be supportive. As a young gay woman (as I was at the time – long story) I lost a job because of my sexuality. It wasn’t illegal at that time to be sacked because of sexuality. It isn’t something I would wish on anyone. It did kick start a long and illustrious? career in being an activist. I argued publicly points that my friends who were teachers, a vicar, a politician, a lawyer were unable to argue anywhere else but over my dining table.
I don’t put my picture on my profile not because my swinging life is private to anyone. It is not. My boss and colleagues know (they love all the stories) my partner knows (of course), my friends know, my son knows – to a point (he is 14 and knows that my partner and I are non-monogamous). I don’t have my picture on my profile because I can’t be bothered to be approached by someone who has found it on the site somewhere and thinks that I might want to be propositioned in freshcos or other inappropriate venue or even at all. I don’t have my picture on here because there are nutters on here just as there are in real life. I know that because I have an ignore list full of them.
I am totally unashamed about what I do. But I am also not about to go and bang the drum about my private life. In business meetings and appointments I wouldn’t announce any detail about my sex life as it is essentially private. I reserve the right to keep it private in every arena I chose. For those reasons I don’t have a face picture that it is instantly accessible. If anyone wants to see me they are welcome to view my face on cam in a chatroom. I am often seen smiling and laughing on cam. I show nothing except my face. I am a prude like that. (again I show nothing else as I am aware that there is software that can copy my cam and I would never want my images to appear attached to anything my son may see.- bless him he would be scarred for life) Right I shall shush now.
splendid
Forum Virgin
Quote by splendid_
I know what you mean tantric. In an ideal world etc etc.
Dayum, two posts to my name and I've been busted as an idealist already. I guess there's no point trying to make the "life is what we make it and if we were all idealists...?" argument?
Hadn't thought about the nutter issue though, I must say. But then again, not being one it's a concept that doesn't hop onto my thought train that often. I can understand how that could well be a problem, though.
It's just occurred to me, I didn't cause offence to anyone with my post, did I? Wasn't my intent if I did. I just like to be provocative, it's a kink of mine.
Anyway, you've had my opinion on the subject, nothing will be served by me rambling on any more.
;)
Matt
no mat u havent upset any one at all, its a matter of personal choice. there is a few people on this site who live within 0 miles of me and some of them are single males, i am not saying they will but they could come walking over to my mrs down the local and start asking questions etc etc wich we dont want.
I proberly could loose my job for what i do but, and the wife would proberly be shuuned out from her bosses, this may not happen but is it worth taking the risk.
We will save pics just for people we wish to meet or have come to trust.
Fraggle.
I proberly could loose my job for what i do but, and the wife would proberly be shuuned out from her bosses, this may not happen but is it worth taking the risk.
We will save pics just for people we wish to meet or have come to trust.
Fraggle.
Quote by Tantric_Obstacles
I guess there's no point trying to make the "life is what we make it and if we were all idealists...?" argument?
you could...but it is another concept and perhaps for another thread. ?
Quote by Tantric_Obstacles
Hadn't thought about the nutter issue though, I must say. But then again, not being one it's a concept that doesn't hop onto my thought train that often. I can understand how that could well be a problem, though.
oh yes, believe me it is. I am sure that others here have their stories too.
Quote by Tantric_Obstacles
It's just occurred to me, I didn't cause offence to anyone with my post, did I? Wasn't my intent if I did. I just like to be provocative, it's a kink of mine.
is offense caused or taken ? I certainly took none. I am also a fan of provocation but that is something I do in real life. You have kinks? that is perfect.. settle down you are welcome.
splendid
