just what is judging, bullying, trolling and opinion belittl

21 Apr 2008

..peacemakers??? if thats the reason serious threads get taken apart, id prefer they didnt bother and let the mods do their job..
the hijacking of threads kills debate in here, there is plenty of room for it on the site but not on threads such as this, or similar.. over moderation i agree can also destroy a forum, it seems to have been addressed in here of late, to some degree anyway, ive been doing forums since they started, footy ones , where you need the broadest shoulders and swinging ones.. they are all the same really , recently ive been on a site that takes no shit from anyone, there was a time when i would of screamed thats over moderating, it isnt if its done right, the mods know when to step in and keep things on track and when not to, no need for peace keepers and no toleration of trolls of any discription, a quiet word rather than a locked thread, where this site goes wrong and has done for way too long is it has allowed the very vocal to run away with the forum, isnt this forum for all members and shouldnt the gobshites remember we arent all as tough as they are...just look at the people you meet in work, in your social life, bill on the shop floor julie in accounts say boo to them and they shrink into the shadows...arent they members here too...
forums are scary places for many of us, to get a forum working at its best you have to remove some of those fears, even if its just being ticked off in public for some its too much, we could all do with remembering why we are here...its not to score points on the forum is it? its to meet new people and play...or has that been lost over the years here?
staggy
xxs

21 Apr 2008

Staggy, I'll step in when I believe someone is heading towards breaking the AUP or has broken the AUP and not before if I can really help it.
But while I'm here I'll post for fun like everyone else :thumbup:

Quote by Stormwalker
I like mushy peas, they are divine with Marmite....

I think thats the worst comment I have ever seen on here
Stormy, you are twisted :twisted: :lol2:

21 Apr 2008

Quote by Dawnie
Staggy, I'll step in when I believe someone is heading towards breaking the AUP or has broken the AUP and not before if I can really help it.
But while I'm here I'll post for fun like everyone else :thumbup:
I like mushy peas, they are divine with Marmite....

I think thats the worst comment I have ever seen on here
Stormy, you are twisted :twisted: :lol2:
thats a hell of a call to have to make,,,when you think they are heading towards breaking the aup.. it would explain pms ive had off mods over the years that i really couldnt understand why i got them ? maybe they thought i was heading towards something? stiil point taken Dawn..
back to thread spoiling, maybe if it was all and sundry that did it but its not, its the same folk time and again, perhaps just twenty people out of a site with god knows how big a membership, cant they just leave well alone every now and again? have their fun on their own threads? maybe open a room for one liners of little consequence and leave a small part of the the forum to more than just look at me stuff?
im caring too much again arent i? back to not giving a fuck i think..
staggy

21 Apr 2008

Quote by wild rose and the stag
back to thread spoiling, maybe if it was all and sundry that did it but its not, its the same folk time and again, perhaps just twenty people out of a site with god knows how big a membership, cant they just leave well alone every now and again? have their fun on their own threads? maybe open a room for one liners of little consequence and leave a small part of the the forum to more than just look at me stuff?
im caring too much again arent i? back to not giving a fuck i think..
staggy

I know what you mean, when I am really getting into a thread it annoys the life out of me to scroll down past the hi-jackers to get to the people posting about the actual thread subject. But then I am as guilty as the next person and I realise that just because I think it is a great thread doesn't mean that the gazzilion other people on the site do and I often hi-jack just cos I can.
If I don't like it I can leave and enter my real life. Which I should really spend more time in than I do, eg. :-I should be studying right now but instead I got carried away with a wank and posting on here.
And, I have been bullied on here. Thankfully that person is banned and I don't miss them one iota.I have been harassed and I have been called names and I have had nasty people say mean things. Really tho' it is only a website. I think that the 'quiet person' from accounts would get their posting boots in innocuous threads first and build up to where they can jump in the deeper threads. (although I know that the quieter people in real life can be as mouthy as heck behind a keyboard)
So whilst I agree with you wrats to a point. I think that perhaps you are worrying needlessly about some things.

21 Apr 2008

i remember when the site was pretty new, its membership wasnt huge but was growing fast.
then the take over happened, there were many debates about the good and bad of a site take over. either way it had happened and nothing was changing that , although a lot of other things did change.
i remember along with the hundred more shaven or hairy, spit or swallow threads it was hoped that the take over would bring in new members and therfore keep the forum exciting, intresting and make it even better.
what i dont understand is the problem people have with repeated threads... i know we get as i said tired of he shaven, hairy threads, but if youve read it before and have nothing to comment then just walk on by.
new memebers join everyday, they havent read the previous threads before as they are new, and sorry but if you start reading a new magazine do you have to read all previous copies before your allowed to coment? and why do we have to use the serch buton, then resurect the thread, its a stale conversation by then let the new ones have new threads and a chance to join in.
anyhow not even older members log in every day/week/month so if it was said a month ago , whats the harm in it being said again?
If there is a good topical thread going and a non malicious debate i hate to see it extend to 5 pages by the time i log in after getting in from work to find it full of one liner hijacking quips.
ive refrained from adding my viewpoint in some threads if certain members are active in there cuse i just know they are going to snap.
im sorry wrats if i havent answered this correctly and i know ive rambled, it wasnt to get my post count up at least lol
xxx fem xxx

21 Apr 2008

Quote by fem_4_taboo
i remember when the site was pretty new, its membership wasnt huge but was growing fast.
then the take over happened, there were many debates about the good and bad of a site take over. either way it had happened and nothing was changing that , although a lot of other things did change.
i remember along with the hundred more shaven or hairy, spit or swallow threads it was hoped that the take over would bring in new members and therfore keep the forum exciting, intresting and make it even better.
what i dont understand is the problem people have with repeated threads... i know we get as i said tired of he shaven, hairy threads, but if youve read it before and have nothing to comment then just walk on by.
new memebers join everyday, they havent read the previous threads before as they are new, and sorry but if you start reading a new magazine do you have to read all previous copies before your allowed to coment? and why do we have to use the serch buton, then resurect the thread, its a stale conversation by then let the new ones have new threads and a chance to join in.
anyhow not even older members log in every day/week/month so if it was said a month ago , whats the harm in it being said again?
If there is a good topical thread going and a non malicious debate i hate to see it extend to 5 pages by the time i log in after getting in from work to find it full of one liner hijacking quips.
ive refrained from adding my viewpoint in some threads if certain members are active in there cuse i just know they are going to snap.
im sorry wrats if i havent answered this correctly and i know ive rambled, it wasnt to get my post count up at least lol
xxx fem xxx

Agree 100% on there are a few who go out of their way to " hi-jack " a thread but these things happen. Forums are fun and this is cyber space. :shock: I have strong views as do others but whilst I may have a go sometimes it is never ever intended to be a personel dig at anyone. When that has happened unintentionally, I have appologised.
Anyone for tennis? lol

:lol:

21 Apr 2008

Quote by fem_4_taboo
i remember when the site was pretty new, its membership wasnt huge but was growing fast.
then the take over happened, there were many debates about the good and bad of a site take over. either way it had happened and nothing was changing that , although a lot of other things did change.
i remember along with the hundred more shaven or hairy, spit or swallow threads it was hoped that the take over would bring in new members and therfore keep the forum exciting, intresting and make it even better.
what i dont understand is the problem people have with repeated threads... i know we get as i said tired of he shaven, hairy threads, but if youve read it before and have nothing to comment then just walk on by.
new memebers join everyday, they havent read the previous threads before as they are new, and sorry but if you start reading a new magazine do you have to read all previous copies before your allowed to coment? and why do we have to use the serch buton, then resurect the thread, its a stale conversation by then let the new ones have new threads and a chance to join in.
anyhow not even older members log in every day/week/month so if it was said a month ago , whats the harm in it being said again?
If there is a good topical thread going and a non malicious debate i hate to see it extend to 5 pages by the time i log in after getting in from work to find it full of one liner hijacking quips.
ive refrained from adding my viewpoint in some threads if certain members are active in there cuse i just know they are going to snap.
im sorry wrats if i havent answered this correctly and i know ive rambled, it wasnt to get my post count up at least lol
xxx fem xxx

excellent post imo
the point on old threads.. i couldnt agree more..gets right up my nose when someone dares to bring up any topic thats been done before only to be told so and to be honest i would rather see old threads wiped off here after so long than new ones pointed towards them, site members change, opinions change, one of the forums we use, a skiing one, closes at the end of the season, its doesnt just close the doors to threads it actually shuts down and starts afresh later in the year ..no old topics ,no old posts, no one saying its been done to death , im not suggesting we do this, i am suggesting we take a leaf from their book and go a little easier on new topics...they may not be new to you but they are for the folk posting them..
and as fem pointed out, if you dont want to read it or get involved stay well clear and let those that do do just that..

21 Apr 2008

I dont post much these days because there does seem to be a high level of people taking things too 'personally' in what should be an open and honest debate. Perception is so individual and to get to a level where you must cross every 'I' and 'T' will always stifle freedom of expression.
I admit that that my words have been misconstrued in here and in email and the chatroom and although I was clear in my meaning it did not stop others judging it in a different manner and using it in a negative way which was never actually the original meaning. I have more of an issue however about bitchiness in chatrooms in whisper than anything thats written on here to be honest.
What I think we have to be more up front about is if a response feels personal how do we deal with it? Is it really personal or is it that for whatever reason we are sensitive because of other things happening in our lives? Once upon a time I would have told the person that I found their words affected me in pm. Now I just look at it like this:
This is not the real world. (Really I hear you say wink

)If I want a really serious debate then I need to go and talk to my mates at work or socially that know me and my personality and therefore know how to respond in a debate with me and vice versa. If I choose to post in here or the chatroom then I take full responsibility for what I write. If I dont like the answer I get then I deal with it by either leaving the debate or saying how it makes me feel in the thread if its appropriate.

21 Apr 2008

Quote by naughtynymphos1
there's a echo in here
i hate self righteous people on this forum who feel the way they swing is right and everyone else is doing it wrong and their opinion on anything else is final

am lost of words...you,me and everyone here has equal right of say
__________
include debate and opinion is the same sentence and you will always enjoy forum no matter what topic it is