My fourth fetish to try: Mars Bars

11 Sep 2005

Hello all
Having sucessfully attempted three of my fetishes this year (feel free to have a guess, I may or may not admit to all of them in public), I now wish to try number four.
I have always loved Mars Bars (three in one day is my record), and a few years back discovered Mars Bars in Batter from certain chip shops, however whilst chattting to a chap online about a certain Strip pub in High Wycombe that we had both frequented he remarked that a certain dancer used to use a mars bar in her routine and then "feed it to a lucky punter".
In trying to search her down online I discovered for the first time that great tale of music folklore about Marianne and Jagger, and most usefully the following anagram "The British singer and actress Marianne Faithfull" which when re-arranged gives you "Slides in a half-eaten Mars Bar...fits right in her ****"
So the long and short is if any of you fine ladies fancy feeding me a coated Mars Bar, you know where I am.
Sits back and waits for several sarcastic replies but hopes to have the last laugh.
Regards
Harry Jones

11 Sep 2005

A mate of mine on hearing the Mick Jagger/Marianne Faithful urban legend commented that Cadbury's Creme Eggs worked quite well.

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Deviated Prevert
A mate of mine on hearing the Mick Jagger/Marianne Faithful urban legend commented that Cadbury's Creme Eggs worked quite well.

Very sticky tho :sticky:

11 Sep 2005

Quote by HarryJones
Having sucessfully attempted three of my fetishes this year (feel free to have a guess, I may or may not admit to all of them in public), I now wish to try number four.

Aw, go on, tell us what the other three are! Please, Pretty please lol

Go one, and I will tell you mine, as long as you dont tell anyone else that is :lol:

Quote by HarryJones
So the long and short is if any of you fine ladies fancy feeding me a coated Mars Bar, you know where I am.

Wouldnt the coating (which I am presuming is batter) hurt?
Now if it had been a chunky kit kat, well that would have been a different story...........

11 Sep 2005

Quote by HornyRed
A mate of mine on hearing the Mick Jagger/Marianne Faithful urban legend commented that Cadbury's Creme Eggs worked quite well.

Very sticky tho :sticky:
ya but niced to be licked out :twisted:
Shoot did i really say that :shock: :eeek: bolt

11 Sep 2005

My ex and I did the Mars Bar thingy once. It is messy yes, and I did enjoy eating it! wink

I'll try a cream egg next time. :twisted:
innocent

:whistling: :whistling:

11 Sep 2005

NWC, Harry's tried battered Mars bars but he's heard of ladies offering coated ones in strip clubs. I presumed he meant that those ones would be coated in the lady's juices. Not sure now you mention it though.

11 Sep 2005

Quote by freckledbird
NWC, Harry's tried battered Mars bars but he's heard of ladies offering coated ones in strip clubs. I presumed he meant that those ones would be coated in the lady's juices.

:shock: I really hope so!!!!
Saying that, I suppose the batter would go soggy after a while lol

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
NWC, Harry's tried battered Mars bars but he's heard of ladies offering coated ones in strip clubs. I presumed he meant that those ones would be coated in the lady's juices.

:shock: I really hope so!!!!
Saying that, I suppose the batter would go soggy after a while lol

Ewwwwww you mucky bugga. Battered Mars bars all round in Wigan then, is it? :lol:

11 Sep 2005

Quote by freckledbird
NWC, Harry's tried battered Mars bars but he's heard of ladies offering coated ones in strip clubs. I presumed he meant that those ones would be coated in the lady's juices.

:shock: I really hope so!!!!
Saying that, I suppose the batter would go soggy after a while lol

Ewwwwww you mucky bugga. Battered Mars bars all round in Wigan then, is it? :lol:
Ewwww, no I dont like mars bars and the thought of them being battered, Ewwww
And soz for being soooo disgusting, I was just thinking out loud :lol: But like I said, if it had been a chunky kit kat, I would do anything for a chunky kit kat, swapped Mr NWC for a chunky kit kat once :lol: (but they sent him back)

11 Sep 2005

Awwwwwwww poor Mr NWC. Bet you're glad you got him back - and you got the Kitkat Chunky as well!
I love Mars bars sliced with bananas and microwaved for about a minute, until the Mars bar goes all gooey. Yummy. Wouldn't really work how Harry's planning though, would it? biggrin

11 Sep 2005

heyup harry....
when you say 3 in a day is your record i suppose you meant eating them........
i hope he meant eating them mad

11 Sep 2005

Does this mean youre trying to get in Debwebs snickers H ??

11 Sep 2005

I tried the Mars bar one with a girlfriend a while ago.... they melt! (the Mars bars I mean!)... it's very messy and a bit sickly... for me anyway, chocolate does not complement girly jiuice.... which is much better neat! biggrin

The discussion reminds me of a story which I'm sure will have everybody running for the sink... but here it is anyway.... It's a story of a guy down to his last few quid, who couldn't afford full sex with the old crabby prossie, he could only run to giving her a licking...
Halfway in, he feels something in his mouth, which he spits into his hand and finds it's a piece of diced carrot... almost gagging, he takes a deap breath and continues, only to find another object in his mouth a few seconds later... that turns out to be a pea... on the verge of throwing up but determined to get his money's worth he talks an even deeper breath and continues... seconds later something else hits the back of his throat and he manages to cough out a piece of sweetcorn... now taking big breaths and sweating profusely in a dire attempt not to embarrass himself... the old tart asks him what's up and he relpies, "I think I'm going to be sick!" To which she replies, "Not another one! You'd be the second one today!" :uhoh:
Hhahahaha :D

11 Sep 2005

Reading through the threads here and the "Try a creme egg" todo list.. it made me smile whilst reminded of that tacky joke how do you like your eggs in the morning? fertilised... well I would now like mine to be "chocolate" but ten it made me laugh when I thought of the creme egg ads... " how do you like yours?? Shoved up a pussy... would love to see that on ITV !!! hahahaha!! :twisted: :twisted:

11 Sep 2005

Choc is tooooo fattening
Go for the melon / strawberry / white grape option :P far more fun

11 Sep 2005

Can it be done with chipc ?? id leave out the curry sauce . cool

11 Sep 2005

Can it be done with chipc ?? id leave out the curry sauce .
not a good idea to put salt on either smile

11 Sep 2005

did we find out what the other 3 fetishes was?

11 Sep 2005

How about a frozen Crunchie ??? Apparently when your partner bites into the bar the "crunch" is very erotic !!
Any volunteeers ? biggrin

:D :D :D :D

11 Sep 2005

Found these at Tescos any good ?

11 Sep 2005

Wow soo many replies I'll try and answer you all.

Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
Aw, go on, tell us what the other three are! Please, Pretty please Go one, and I will tell you mine, as long as you dont tell anyone else that is :lol:

Mrs NWC that new avatar has earnt you an immediate pm with all the answers on but I want these others to guess so keep it to yourself and I will likewise quietly retain any answers you give me.

Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
Wouldnt the coating (which I am presuming is batter) hurt?
Now if it had been a chunky kit kat, well that would have been a different story...........

I am NOT offering chip shop batter as a coating, the whole idea is to pleasure the lady with said mars bar then eat it myself together with said female love juices on it. I hope that clarifies that for you and Bev (was nice to meet you Bev albeit for a very short time)
I am just about to buy a box of chunky kit kats ready for next time we meet wink

Who was next :lol:

Debbiewebs wrote ya but niced to be licked out

Of course I will promise to lick out any chocolate remains afterwards, for a very long time just to make really sure all traces are gone.
Dargento - record is "consuming three mars bars in a 24 hour period"
Silk and Big G I don't like snickers they have bits in, but any attempt to get near to Debwebs has to be worth a go biggrin

Barewolf thank you for that completely tasteless story.
Silk of course I could use chips instead, anything for you :wink:
Naughtynymphos - No you are all supposed to be guessing but can only guarantee admitting to two of them but you might catch me off guard.
Velvet lips - thanks for suggestion but I dont like Crunchies either frozen or warm.
Thanks Folks and keep guessing rolleyes

Harry Jones

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Silk and Big G
Can it be done with chips ?? id leave out the curry sauce .

Brings a whole new meaning to 'chips and dips' :twisted: lol

Nice to meet you too, Harry biggrin

11 Sep 2005

I always thought that
'A finger of fudge was just enough to give the girls a treat' lol

:lol:

11 Sep 2005

It all seems total bollocks to me, now, that might just be cos I'm a grumpy bastard tonight, but come on. Mars bars are hard unforgivin things that for the life of me, I can't see as giving any real measurable pleasure and certainly not when measured against the mess and impracticalities and lets face it, short of sticking it in something really powerfull tasting, isnt going to taste of anything other than ....mars bar :shock: is it!....so where's the point dunno

11 Sep 2005

miserable bastard

11 Sep 2005

Must admit, I didnt think it was much of a Topic!

11 Sep 2005

sounds like a myth started by the mars marketing department biggrin

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Silk and Big G
miserable bastard

honest miserable bastard Silk and the big G.....honest miserable bastard.
........davej off to whizz a few flumps up his arse to see if it makes em taste better...

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Silk and Big G
Found these at Tescos any good ?

oooo that look brill........... can you bring one a long to the car park :twisted: :twisted: