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School days riddles

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Unknown User
Don't you just love those riddles and jokes from your childhood. The awful puns. The unsophisicated wit of Christmas Crackers.
Why not post your favourites here
What do you call a boomarang that doesn't come back?
Steve
Sex God
Quote by keeno
What do you call a boomarang that doesn't come back?

A stick
Whats black and white and re(a)d all over ?
Unknown User
a newspaper.
ummm can we play kiss chase now ? wink
I really don't know riddles. sorry
Unknown User
Dont come running to me if you break your leg
lets go behind the bike sheds
meat2pleaseu
Sex God
Quote by Steve
Whats black and white and red all over ?

I thought that was a bloodstained penguin :mrgreen:
Unknown User
Where does a polar bear go to the toilet?
Unknown User
My fave was always:
Why do elephants have big ears?
coz Noddy wouldn't pay the ransom :giggle:
GnV
Sex God
What's long and thin, covered in skin, red in parts and stuffed in tarts?
Rhubarb
Unknown User
Are we supposed to answer the riddle put up by the previous person? If so, sorry Flower, I dont know, does it have something to do with Mrs Bonedigger? bolt
In the meantime, I went to a zoo at the weekend. The only animal there was a small dog.... It was a shit zoo....
Unknown User
Quote by Misterwood
Are we supposed to answer the riddle put up by the previous person? If so, sorry Flower, I dont know, does it have something to do with Mrs Bonedigger? bolt
In the meantime, I went to a zoo at the weekend. The only animal there was a small dog.... It was a shit zoo....

oh gosh, that is funny. I do like riddles. I still can't think of any. rolleyes
I do think, Misterwood, that we are supposed to be answering the previous riddle.
Unknown User
Quote by flower411
What`s yellow and goes up and down ??

A banana in a lift? :giggle:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
What shivers on the sea bed?
helnheaven
Sex God
A nervous wreck! lol
When is a door not a door?
Unknown User
When its ajar... boom boom lol
Why do cows wear bells?
anais
Sex God
Because their horns don't work!!
What do you call a Nun with a washing machine on her head?
helnheaven
Sex God
sister-matic
What four-legged animal can jump higher than a house?
Unknown User
Quote by helnheaven
sister-matic
What four-legged animal can jump higher than a house?


All four legged animals can jump higher than a house..... Houses can't jump! :giggle:
Why cant elephants ride bikes?
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Unknown User
I'm sure it's nothing to do wuth balance, as Ive seen elephants balance and indeed even walk two legged on large balls. (on tv I hasten add)
Might it be something to do with pneumatic pressure in the average bicycle tyre... or that lack of opposable digits?
lp
Lost
Sex God
Lp! Its reticulating thumbs it is it is!! :bounce:
What goes green red green red green red white?
Unknown User
Quote by Lost
Lp! Its reticulating thumbs it is it is!! :bounce:
What goes green red green red green red white?

if my thumbs were to reticultate without my prior knowledge, I'd be straight down the docs.
I'm not going have any of that body-rebelion nonsence, no way!
lp
Unknown User
How do you tell if there has been an elephant in your fridge? rolleyes
Mrs__wadefun
Sexlightened
what do you call a woman who can balance ten pints of lager on one hand and play snooker with the other hand :mrgreen:
Unknown User
Quote by Mrs-wadefun
what do you call a woman who can balance ten pints of lager on one hand and play snooker with the other hand :mrgreen:

Beer-trix Potter lol
What's the difference between a brave soldier and an unhygienic baker?
Unknown User
Quote by Cherrytree
What's the difference between a brave soldier and an unhygienic baker?

A brave soldier darts into the foe
noladreams
Sex God
Quote by Cherrytree

What's the difference between a brave soldier and an unhygienic baker?

A brave soldier darts into the foe
:laughabove:
westerross
Sex God
Quote by Cherrytree

What's the difference between a brave soldier and an unhygienic baker?

A brave soldier darts into the foe
:laughabove:
I guess you waited long enough while we were scratching our heads lol
I quite like the book titles genre.
"Mess at the Bottom of the Cliff" by Eileen Dover.
(Sorry just realised it ain't a riddle - will Keeno allow us to expand?)
.
Unknown User
What happened when a blue ship collided with a red ship?
Tan____Kinky
Sex God
Both crews were marooned. :laughabove:
Did you hear about the two men from the monastery who opened a fast-food seafood restaurant?
Unknown User
One was the fish friar, the other was the chip monk.
Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?
Unknown User
There was no atmosphere
Whats small, pink and wrinkly and hangs out your Granddads underpants? :giggle: :giggle:
Unknown User
Quote by Nomad_Soul
Whats small, pink and wrinkly and hangs out your Granddads underpants? :giggle: :giggle:

Is it grandma? lol