I think there is. I have been thinking about this since reading the 'derogatory' thread.
I find it hard to think of 'slut' as anything other than a derogatory term and would never use it. 'Tart', on the other hand, seems more playful and I find it more acceptable as a piece of fun. Sappho and I call each other a tart quite often - though only ever in jest. I don't think I could ever bring myself to call her (or any woman) a slut - even as part of a role play scenario.
I am not passing judgement on anyone who does use it playfully with their partner. If it works for them then that's fine.
Does anyone else think there's a difference?
I would be partiicularly interested to hear what the ladies of the Forum have to say. In my experience, it can be fun for a woman to be 'tarty' - whether that be a way of dressing, a way of behaviour or just 'larking about' - but they wouldn't want to be thought of as a slut as this has other connotations.
What do you think - or am I just too straight laced?
Will
What a smart conversation and an good question to ask.
No your not straight laced its your point of view.
Since respecting each others limits and desires is an important part of swinging understanding that some areas are turn offs or off limits is also important.
Personally I dont find either term derogatory however that doesnt mean I am wrong or right or that another individual is wrong or right , in that view its just a position to be taken in context to the definition.
its often interesting that its the external observer who places value judgements on the recipients and creators and then creates their own noise levels to jusitfy their views and remove the rights and privileges of others to express them.
Use of a word, any word, with a lover a partner or a friend would have context and can infer as much respect and honour without degrading the individual but those are measures valued within context of that relationship and cant be judged externally.
Using a word without context with a individual who is not familiar with myself or my partners and friends will lead to conflict and upset so I would be careful how to employ it.
Im probably not explaining it well so I better be prepared to be flamed.
Thanks for asking the question though its a smart one.
I thought you explained that perfectly well.
Curious that some people have opposite views of which of these two can be playful and which seems more insulting. I hadn't thought of the possibility of geographical differences in how the terms are used or received. Interesting.
More comments welcome!
Will
All very sensible responses above. Just one thing to add: tart is increasingly being used to describe a male as well as a female (especially in SH forums and chatrooms), and is almost always used nowadays in a humorous way. Whatever derogatory sense it used to have has now almost been "defused", so I think that makes it very different from slut.
Good topic Will. :thumbup:
Conventionally isn't a "tart" a woman who has sex for money while a "slut" is promiscuous for free?
Tartseems mostly lighthearted these days and slut the more serious word. I suppose intention, context and taste make either derogatory or not.
Being called either is pretty anti-erotic to me - I prefer to be worshipped rather than denigrated!
i prefer dek to call me slut rather than tart but others who dont know me so well i think i would rather be a tart in their eyes bitch however is a word i do not like being called at all i have banned dek from calling me it :shock: again its all in or out of context
When I was learning english a tart was a prostitute and a slut was a slovenly ill kempt woman.
Of late I frequently hear women refer to each other jocularly as tarts.
Ive heard and used the term slut as part of sex talk. Its funny but I seem to recall it often used with the "little" modifier.
Seems to me u can say what u like to the right person at the right time.
Aint language a wonderful thing.
On a different view. In the fetish scene the term
slut is readily accepted ,in fact seen as a
compliment and one that usually has to be earned as in my case.
It often depends on the context and setting for such words to be interpreted in a variety of ways.
The tart has generally been seen as an acceptable description of the promiscuous but somewhat charming adventurer.
The slut is the more knowing and opportunistic gold digger, using sex as a tool for various acquisitions.
However its just as easy to turn either view around. Simply by taking a liking for one or the other.
The tart could be condemned for being a gormless panhandler unaware of her sexual incompetence and blundering.
The slut could easily be upgraded as a savvy business operator, with enviable sexual skills.
I totally think it is a matter of context and the relationship bewtween the individuals involved in the conversation.
I have been called both terms, and not taken offence and I have been called both and taken offence. It all depended on the person who said it and the situation.
Nola x
Yes...would never call any woman, even in the throes of lusty passion a 'slut'....horrible, demeaning term. Tart? If the lady is comfortable with it, again during some sexual liaison, then fine, but I was brought up to show a little respect...old fashioned? Maybe, but I stand by those standards. For me, the best tarts are filled with treacle...!!!
A very interesting topic and a broad spectrum of views on the use of two words that seem to have such a wide variety of meaning.
As someone who likes to treat the ladies I meet with respect I personally would not have dreamt of calling any of them a slut or a tart either during sex or socially.
However last year I met a lady for a night of fun and during the proceedings she asked me to call her names, including slut, tart and whore.
Not something I am used to and I was the one feeling very uncomfortable about it! She, on the other hand, was getting VERY turned on by it, The more I told her she was being a dirty slut or whore the more excited she got!!
All a matter of taste I suppose.
and I don't get offended by this, infact, it is a bit of long standing joke between us. My mind relates tart to something nicer than it does with Slut. 
But I do feel it can be used in a saucy, rather than derogatory way.
I wondered if it might be a generational thing, being an old fart, but my lady who is less than half my age likes tart enough to include it in her SH nickname. I'm reasonably sure that if I called her a slut, not that I ever would, I'd be singing soprano from that point on :!: 
So, it seems I was totally wrong when I said we didnt use it!
).
I would soooooo like to buy that lady a drink!! 