Quote by fabio grooverider
Could be tricky if you're a vegetarian... : Good idea though and well found SB
How many hours a day do you ACTUALLY spend on the internet Sarge :?:
or should that be typing stuff into the Google search bar :?: .... :D :D

Quote by
What would you call a normal sized penis?
:P

Quote by phillstarr
yet another one........... :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
good first post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
with the tact and deplomacy you have shown on here, i`m supprised she ain`t begged you too

Quote by fabio grooverider
i maybe be a rarity... but i actually read what people have written, if i like what i read then and only then would i look at a picture..... in a sense.. pictures are overrated, the mind is the tool that need to be awakened... not any other body bit....
i need to feel an affinity for the people I play with and not even "miss world with a 1 line advert" is going to do it for me.......
like i say.. i am strange
sean xxxxxxxxxx

Quote by Missy
Hmmm let's see .
They're soft and lumpy and wonderful to dive into.
They have a tendency to go in and out throughout the day.
They're affected by the gravitational pull of the moon
and they make a lovely swishy sound when they hit the shoreline.
Oh.. and they're wet.

Quote by steff35
met a guy once who asked me to stuff his erect cock with rice grains, Managed to get quite a lot down, but now wondering how boring the stuffing was! Love parsely and thyme myself!!!

Quote by walnut
met a guy once who asked me to stuff his erect cock with rice grains, Managed to get quite a lot down, but now wondering how boring the stuffing was! Love parsely and thyme myself!!!

Quote by steff35
Certainly my dear................................................nips out for some more sage and onion and sausage meat
Then has a shower and preens himself in preparation for the nibbling and stuffing ceremony. :wink:

Quote by The Muttleys
Certainly my dear................................................nips out for some more sage and onion and sausage meat
Then has a shower and preens himself in preparation for the nibbling and stuffing ceremony. :wink:

Quote by The Muttleys
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Ohhhhh nibble away hun...........do u want some stuffing with it?? :shock:
Steff m8, always happy to oblige.........do you know ithink im becoming a really funny guy. :roll:

Quote by The Muttleys
ooooowch mrandmrs bedz :shock:
Ive never sent a cock to anyone...ever, and never will. I tend to rely on my personality to overcome any shortcomings there may be elsewhere.
As for the stuffing..........sage and onion with some sausage meat and turkey juices, roasted in balls in the oven...yummm.

Quote by dambuster
Now Now - Play nice
Welcome to the asylum pervylittlespannermonkey.
One strange place I've done the rumpity pumpity was actually just in a car.
A mini.
I was that good - she fainted and was past passed unkonshus for about 10 very long minutes.
The truth is - It was along time ago, before we had head restraints in cars. She layed her head over the back of the seat, trapped a nerve in her neck and fainted Bluddy good job it was before the days of moblie phones or I'd have been on the 999 for an ambulance before she came round :shock: The only reason I didn't dash straight off for help is that we were in the middle of Tangmere (?) Airfield in an "out of bounds" area ops:

Quote by BiWelshMinx
Iwas pregnant with my son,10 days overdue and just praying that I would 'drop' soon. Having tried the usual remedies, a good shag, a strong curry to no avail I was dreading the scheduled induction . So imagine my joy when 3 days before the induction date I climbed out of bed and a great gush of water ran between my legs. "Great this is it", I thought.
I rang the hospital, explained my situation and although I wasn't having any contractions the midwife told me to come in anyway due to the risk of infection.
Right, so off I goes with the bf, excited, nervous but mainly happy that I didn't need the induction. We arrive at the hospital clutching my overnight bags all nerves and trepidation, go through the story again to the midwife on reception, get booked in and shown to an examination room.
A rather strait looking midwife comes in, checks my notes, asks a few questions and tells me to lay back to be examined. Any woman who has been there knows it's not the most dignified of circumstances, but to be told that "No your waters haven't broken, you have just wet yourself dear", whilst in that position has to be the most embarrassing moment in my life!
Needless to say we were outof there like a shot and I still had the ruddy induction

Minx x x

Quote by Him'nHer
M Strolls in with the rubber gear on looking mean 'n 'ard ................... right where's the newbie that wants a shag then :twisted:

Quote by martellnotts
Great idea..
When I get mine I need a volunteer to stick it in me....I mean on me....
Mrs B

Quote by Sexysteph
You lot are mean - he's only 20 that makes trainable
Hiya Dan welcome to Swingingheaven
Relax and slow down.
Read some of the advice threads knocking about which can only help :wink:
Get a couple of drinks down your neck and join in.
Have fun
Steph
I know am late on parade but have been doing RL stuff

Quote by TallFunLondon
Hi to both of you. Maybe you could tell us a bit about you?

Quote by Manolishi
Got a shag yet??

Quote by sierra
Got a shag yet??

Quote by TallFunLondon
Got a shag yet??