Having read all of the replies I thought I would put my twopenneth in!!!!!!
Hubby and I do both seperate and same room, we get different things out of the different experiences, I love watching him with another woamn and also joining in where I can but I also enjoy the thrill of hearing the excitement from a different room and knowing later I will hear about it, but nothing is ever pre planned we just go with the flow so to speak.
I will add that we would never do seperate rooms on a first meet though mainly because of the safety aspect.
Olive