Bizarre contradictions in SH ads

11 Nov 2007

What's the most bizarre and contradictory text you've seen in an ad on here? I look through the ads on a regular basis snd still I come across new "gems" that never cease to amaze me!
I'd love to hear about the strangest ones you've come across.....no quoting of specific paragraphs of ad text or user names (this is not meant to be a naming and shaming thread!) and please be mindful of keeping the sexual descriptions reasonably clean. wink

Here's a starter for you:
Men Seeking Men: a male looking for c*ck/a*se fun who's very clear that he's not in the least bit bi or gay but happy to indulge in sucking, licking, fecking, taking part in videos and swallowing. However (and this is the clincher) he doesn't like to kiss - so that's what makes him straight!

11 Nov 2007

its gotta be the well hung or VWE one for me....then you see the cock shots and youve seen bigger things wriggling on the end of a fishing line. lol

:lol:

11 Nov 2007

Quote by Bonedigger
its gotta be the well hung or VWE one for me....

Yes, and don't you just love it when they come into a chatroom and state they're bigger than an oversized donkey, and proceed to show on cam - and you think "just what starting point did they use for the tape measure?"
:giggle:

11 Nov 2007

LoL yep, bless em...you gotta feel sorry for em :P not!!

11 Nov 2007

Quote by McrM4M-pvtOK
its gotta be the well hung or VWE one for me....

Yes, and don't you just love it when they come into a chatroom and state they're bigger than an oversized donkey, and proceed to show on cam - and you think "just what starting point did they use for the tape measure?"
:giggle:
PMSL....
Well everyone knows you start at the neck lol... Surely!!
Mike x

11 Nov 2007

Quote by mdr2000
its gotta be the well hung or VWE one for me....

Yes, and don't you just love it when they come into a chatroom and state they're bigger than an oversized donkey, and proceed to show on cam - and you think "just what starting point did they use for the tape measure?"
:giggle:
PMSL....
Well everyone knows you start at the neck lol... Surely!!
Mike x
I start at the town boundary!! redface

11 Nov 2007

Quote by Mal
I start at the town boundary!!

:giggle:

:laughabove:

11 Nov 2007

lol, aww mal....you know its not the size of the vessel, its the motion of your ocean lol

:lol:

11 Nov 2007

Quote by Bonedigger
its gotta be the well hung or VWE one for me....then you see the cock shots and youve seen bigger things wriggling on the end of a fishing line. :lol:

Maybe its the fact that the male half is not particularly well endowed that makes them wish for a vwe male for a change dunno

11 Nov 2007

Quote by Bonedigger
lol, aww mal....you know its not the size of the vessel, its the motion of your ocean :lol:

.......and I keep meeting those who get sea-sick!! :crazy: :grin:

11 Nov 2007

Quote by Mal
its gotta be the well hung or VWE one for me....

Yes, and don't you just love it when they come into a chatroom and state they're bigger than an oversized donkey, and proceed to show on cam - and you think "just what starting point did they use for the tape measure?"
:giggle:
PMSL....
Well everyone knows you start at the neck lol... Surely!!
Mike x
I start at the town boundary!! redface

I didn't say who's neck.... :evil2:

11 Nov 2007

I just read one saying something like:
"Sexy couple looking for sexy couple to play with, but there is a catch, guys she won't let you play with her"
dunno

why can't people be specific rolleyes

11 Nov 2007

where it says straight male on front of profile but in the adverts it says bi male :crazy:

11 Nov 2007

when it say man looking for gay female cpl rolleyes

er why ?

11 Nov 2007

Quote by northeastcoupleuk
when it say man looking for gay female cpl er why ?

So that he can show them what they're missing, silly! :lol:

11 Nov 2007

This presents the justification for the 'Ronseal Swinger'........
Someone who does exactly what they say on the ad.

11 Nov 2007

Quote by duncanlondon
This presents the justification for the 'Ronseal Swinger'........
Someone who does exactly what they say on the ad.

What if we don't have an ad. though?

11 Nov 2007

Quote by Freckledbird
This presents the justification for the 'Ronseal Swinger'........
Someone who does exactly what they say on the ad.

What if we don't have an ad. though?
Are you a Ronseal Swinger then? With a 5 year guarantee?

11 Nov 2007

Quote by duncanlondon
This presents the justification for the 'Ronseal Swinger'........
Someone who does exactly what they say on the ad.

What if we don't have an ad. though?
Are you a Ronseal Swinger then? With a 5 year guarantee?
Hmmmm think I may be past my sell-by date! lol

11 Nov 2007

Quote by Freckledbird
This presents the justification for the 'Ronseal Swinger'........
Someone who does exactly what they say on the ad.

What if we don't have an ad. though?
Are you a Ronseal Swinger then? With a 5 year guarantee?
Hmmmm think I may be past my sell-by date! lol

Oh well ...........
We'll have to strain you through an old pair of tights and add some thinners.

11 Nov 2007

Quote by duncanlondon
Oh well ...........
We'll have to strain you through an old pair of tights and add some thinners.

:shock: Kinky sod! lol

11 Nov 2007

Quote by Freckledbird

Oh well ...........
We'll have to strain you through an old pair of tights and add some thinners.

:shock: Kinky sod! lol

Quite right, that's after I've cut out the gusset for my personal collection.

11 Nov 2007

I smiled when i saw this thread. A while back i contacted a guy advertising for fun with couples. I mailed him and said i would like him to have fun with me while my husband watches. He wrote back and said "i'm not bi or gay so i can't do that".
I still can't figure it out.

11 Nov 2007

Quote by northeastcoupleuk
when it say man looking for gay female cpl er why ?

oh t :roll: for a 3some obviously and gay means happy right biggrin

12 Nov 2007

Fancy some nice meaty c*ck?
Whats he after?
Someone to warm up the fying pan and have it with some nice mushrooms and eggs. lol

12 Nov 2007

Quote by hannah222
I smiled when i saw this thread. A while back i contacted a guy advertising for fun with couples. I mailed him and said i would like him to have fun with me while my husband watches. He wrote back and said "i'm not bi or gay so i can't do that".
I still can't figure it out.

i think what that guy means is he wants a single fem however as the swinging market is probably short on such commoddity he will try a couple but thinks that gives him the right to seek that meet hoping the hubby will let her meet him on her own.

12 Nov 2007

seen one yesterday that made me laugh,
bi curious female looking for bi single male or couple with bi male erm why?

12 Nov 2007

Quote by northeastcoupleuk
when it say man looking for gay female cpl er why ?

i've always wondered that one, i did actually ask a guy in the chat room once why he wanted a female gay couple and if he knew what gay ment dunno

he said he had met a lesbian couple b4 and they just used his as a live dildo, so i pointed out they was a female couple who was both bi and he replied no they was lesbians they just used me as a dildo :crazy:

12 Nov 2007

While we are letting off steam
Can someone tell me why an icon states a woman is single and when you click on the profile, first thing-MARRIED! why do they do that?

12 Nov 2007

Quote by Bonedigger
its gotta be the well hung or VWE one for me....then you see the cock shots and youve seen bigger things wriggling on the end of a fishing line. :lol:

Too true! :giggle: