Quote by kazswallows
when did we get a"no ?" we didn`t ask, we never got that far, that was the whole point of the joke,, dohhh,!!!!!!!
very childish i can see this thread getting blocked again[/quote
yeh yeh yeh !!!!!!!!!!
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flicknlick__cpl
Over 90 days ago
Male
Forum
Quote by mal609
Did someone send you for a long stand just before mentioning this to you??
Or a bag of spirit level bubbles? :shock:
once sent an apprentice to the toilet cos we broke the tap, tapping a hole, said there some on the sink in the loo, he went three times before he got it,
kazswallows
woops stomach in mouth now, not for me
:? :? sure you got the right username 
:lol: Gentlemen, may i ask for some serious discussion on this delicate subject,
having just been told by flick to trim my pubes for our visit to utopia tonight, i decided to give the gonads a little shave, shit, of all the advice on here, no one said where shaving, should start and end, there is no "plimsol" line so to speak.
Having almost cracked two vertibrae trying to see up to my arsehole, (all mirrors are fixed and super gluing my feet to the ceiling only resulted in 2 foot shaped holes in the plaster and a sore head) i decided there should be an international standard.
Not knowing what it would be, i invented my own.
Fit an elastic band around your bollocks, thereby giving you a plimsol, hereby known as the "plumsol line" and all areas protruding from this line are the shaving area, this should prevent any confusion and stop you shaving down to your knees.
Please remember if adopting this method, remove the plumsol line asap or your gonads will take on the apperance of an old bruised peach.
I have already applied for the patent.
having just been told by flick to trim my pubes for our visit to utopia tonight, i decided to give the gonads a little shave, shit, of all the advice on here, no one said where shaving, should start and end, there is no "plimsol" line so to speak.
Having almost cracked two vertibrae trying to see up to my arsehole, (all mirrors are fixed and super gluing my feet to the ceiling only resulted in 2 foot shaped holes in the plaster and a sore head) i decided there should be an international standard.
Not knowing what it would be, i invented my own.
Fit an elastic band around your bollocks, thereby giving you a plimsol, hereby known as the "plumsol line" and all areas protruding from this line are the shaving area, this should prevent any confusion and stop you shaving down to your knees.
Please remember if adopting this method, remove the plumsol line asap or your gonads will take on the apperance of an old bruised peach.
I have already applied for the patent.
Redneck Family Tree
Many, many years ago
When I was twenty-three,
I got married to a widow
Who was pretty as could be.
This widow had a daughter
Who had hair of red
My father fell in love with her,
And soon the two were wed.
This made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life.
My daughter was my mother,
For she was my father's wife.
To complicate the matters worse,
Although it brought me joy,
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy.
My little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad.
And so became my uncle,
Though it made me very sad.
For if he was my uncle,
Then that also made him brother
To the widow's grown-up daughter
Who, of course was my step-mother.
Father's wife then had a son,
Who kept them on the run.
And he became my grandson,
For he was my daughter's son.
My wife is now my mother's mom.
And it surely makes me blue.
Because, although she is my wife,
She is my grandma too.
If my wife is my grandmother,
Then I am her grandchild.
And every time I think of it,
It simply drives me wild.
For now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw.
As the husband of my grandmother,
I am my own grandpa!
Many, many years ago
When I was twenty-three,
I got married to a widow
Who was pretty as could be.
This widow had a daughter
Who had hair of red
My father fell in love with her,
And soon the two were wed.
This made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life.
My daughter was my mother,
For she was my father's wife.
To complicate the matters worse,
Although it brought me joy,
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy.
My little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad.
And so became my uncle,
Though it made me very sad.
For if he was my uncle,
Then that also made him brother
To the widow's grown-up daughter
Who, of course was my step-mother.
Father's wife then had a son,
Who kept them on the run.
And he became my grandson,
For he was my daughter's son.
My wife is now my mother's mom.
And it surely makes me blue.
Because, although she is my wife,
She is my grandma too.
If my wife is my grandmother,
Then I am her grandchild.
And every time I think of it,
It simply drives me wild.
For now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw.
As the husband of my grandmother,
I am my own grandpa!
Quote by Marya
SO WHOEVER HAS THE OLD LICK, YOU CAN KEEP HIM AND WELCOME!!!
Really? I've taught him everything I know, got him house-trained and all but now I'm bored. Can I have a go at your new Lick?
have to give that some serious thought! am i being greedy wanting to keep him for
myself ?
flick
Hi all
i dont post much myself as you have probably noticed,my lick does most of the posts,but i am bursting to tell someone about last night and sorry, but its gonna have to be you guys.I had the most incredibly romantic experience i have ever had with someone who looks,smells,talks,and shags just like my hubby,but clearly this man is an imposter.!!!
I got home from work to find the bedroom lit entirely by rose scented candles, red roses everywhere,my fav wine,a beautiful picnic laid out on the bed with all my fav things to eat
and this imposter lying naked waiting to pleasure me in what ever way i wanted,whats a girl to do? well this girl got all emotional and started to cry!!! CHRIST! he even went out to buy candle holders and burners and the scented oil to go in them!! i didnt even know he knew this stuff exsisted. :shock:
so you can understand how i reacted the way i did.
I absolutely fucking adore this imposter!! :inlove: :inlove: :inlove: :inlove: :inlove: :inlove:
SO WHOEVER HAS THE OLD LICK, YOU CAN KEEP HIM AND WELCOME!!!
FLICK XXXXXX
i dont post much myself as you have probably noticed,my lick does most of the posts,but i am bursting to tell someone about last night and sorry, but its gonna have to be you guys.I had the most incredibly romantic experience i have ever had with someone who looks,smells,talks,and shags just like my hubby,but clearly this man is an imposter.!!!
I got home from work to find the bedroom lit entirely by rose scented candles, red roses everywhere,my fav wine,a beautiful picnic laid out on the bed with all my fav things to eat
and this imposter lying naked waiting to pleasure me in what ever way i wanted,whats a girl to do? well this girl got all emotional and started to cry!!! CHRIST! he even went out to buy candle holders and burners and the scented oil to go in them!! i didnt even know he knew this stuff exsisted. :shock:
so you can understand how i reacted the way i did.I absolutely fucking adore this imposter!! :inlove: :inlove: :inlove: :inlove: :inlove: :inlove:
SO WHOEVER HAS THE OLD LICK, YOU CAN KEEP HIM AND WELCOME!!!
FLICK XXXXXX
This thread has reminded me of a story a guy told me about the second world war,
apparently they used to lie in the bath with just the tip of their cock above water,
then de wing a fly and it will buzz around your helmet like mad.
Maybe that`s where they got the idea for vibrating a dildo :lol:
and No!! i haven`t tried it
lick
apparently they used to lie in the bath with just the tip of their cock above water,
then de wing a fly and it will buzz around your helmet like mad.
Maybe that`s where they got the idea for vibrating a dildo
:lol: and No!! i haven`t tried it
lick
