Hi All,
I have decided to take a bit of a break from actively meeting people from this site for a while, though as the libidinous creature that I am I don't know how long that will last.
I've read the guidelines and my new rules for myself are as follows to get rid of the timewasters:
1. Don't send pictures, only talk on 'cam' in real time to determine that the person is who they say they are and to stop my photo going out into cyber space so many times, I'm now a lot more 'connected' to the internet than I was before so I can do this now, dongle allowing.
2. I will meet for a social drink first, and nothing will happen that time, then if they are worth my time and if either of us get second thoughts it gives time for that to be thought thrugh and will alleviate any problems such as nerves, second thoughts etc.
3. I will be 'more' explicit in advance of what I want or don't want and if they don't like that or they don't want it they can rugger off.
4. I will be clear in my profle as to what I do and don't expect from those I meet, though I am fairly clear normally, current profile being the exception.
5. I will exchange numbers and expect a call in advance of and on the day of the meet.
NEW RULES FOR AMBER TO BE BETTER:
1. I will not be late (I'm always faffing gettnig ready for a meet and therefore about 80% of the time I'm usually late (sorry).
2. I will ask questions if I have any concerns.
Any other tips?
I'm experienced and I know how to be safe, but I think ta there are other things I could learn, such as not to discuss my new forays into the world of the fetish scene and scare off young people!
Any other thoughts?
Much obliged,
Ax
Oh and I always
Try to give as much notice as possible if I can't make it
Say when I'm not interested
I think that this is a really interesting topic.
Why did I come here, well I was just out of many years of 'heavy' relationships and I wanted to be naughty and have unadulterated and filthy sex.
Have I achieved that? Yes, have I had odd experiences, yes.
Very (including getting robbed and stalked).
Sometimes I get fed up with time wasters and then go away for a few months, and then come back with more energy and patience.
I'm still learning, I've met some very very sexy people who have pushed my sexual boundaries in ways I never thought were possible.
For example I'm now a part time 'Mistress' - just for playing.
I think that a lot of people are here for very different reasons, and that we will all have very different reasons for signing on here at different stages in the year/our lives.
The next logical question, is did you get out of this what you expected?
Me - yes and more, much more, but I've also learned a lot about myself in the process, including how to be truly sexually confident and liberated, but to be respectful and kind to my lovers, and prospective lovers.
What have you learned about your sexuality / interaction sexually?
I've made mistakes with others and they've made mistakes with me, but you learn and you move on.
Overall I'm very happy to have ocme here, I know that I'm incredibly bi, but that didn't come around from being here.
A x
blush
My netbook just pasted my favourite pub, anyone who has met me will know where it is, I was much more eloquent the third time my netbook stroke domgle deleted it.....
I have met some very fine examples of this lifestyle here, but I'm bored of having my very prescious and hot time wasted,(insert random german)?
I'm outta here on the 26yh, please come to my misspellled social if you choose.
Essentially this is a HUGE thank you to the 'oldies' that helped me find my feet and the hotties who helped me to know that good sex is out there.
a
Happy hunting
(hopefully a little more legible)
Check out my profile,
Up all night, off for a nap, but if around and interested for about wine / meet in nw london email me?
This never works, but who knows!
A x
Amber and Mistress A are ready to join a nunnery and a convent all at once
And not for kinky purposes, ok, I know it was lastminutedotcom
But gaaah
I give up, not one but three individuals wasting my time tonight!
What has happened to my favourite site, is it time to rest my six inch heels and learn to love my rabbit?
a x
Debbie and Mark,
Sent you my number?
Mark in London never that bored, must train some subs to do that for me, seems cruel and unecessary from where I am!!
A xx
ps in a nunnery I will get winkles, never let it be said that we bi single and real females are not mucked about, I was, we are, but we still keep coming backfor more to meet nice real people!
A xx
Debbie and Mark,
Sent you my number?
Mark in London never that bored, must train some subs to do that for me, seems cruel and unecessary from where I am!!
A xx
ps in a nunnery I will get winkles, never let it be said that we bi single and real females are not mucked about, I was, we are, but we still keep coming backfor more to meet nice real people!
A xx
Clearly, tis not meant to be, off to do some ironing, what fun!
Ah well, bonne soir mon petit lapin
Well,
Nothing ventured nothing gained! My evil dongle will not let me into the chat room and I'm feeling like misbehaving after many domestic chores!
Will need face pic, phone verification and you must be willing to come to NW London, other than that I'm fairly open (but not desperate, I have my rabbit).
Anyone perusing this sporadically email me and we'll take it from there.
I know it's late, but hey, I'm opportunistic!
Amber x
Hi Mike, I thought it was about time someone did it! I've been on the site for nearly five years and NADA - que?
So even if it's me and one other person this will happen!
Amber xx
And if fun I'll definately arrange another one
Can I just add that someone notified me that England will be playing this day, so I'll find a pub with a garden and a screen, dependant upon demand, comeon, surely there are people from london on this site!!! :twisted:
Put it this way, I had a very quiet week and my rabbits are nearly worn out!
Amber
PS Please put social or munch or some such in your email title, I get a lot of random emails, and don't want to miss any rather more interesting ones!
A xx
Sorry guys,
Too much going on to organise this, so I'm afraid I can't.
Hope someone else will take up the Baton so to speak and organise an under represented munch.
A x
I've recently become a lot more active in the fetish scene than ever before, a year ago I looked at things I now wear and use with pleasure and went 'huh'? Never!!
It's about the scenario and the people, for example I now own a collar and I also own a leash, I have a latex spank skirt (much fun).
The leash is for me to use and the collar for me to wear, it can be sexy, like a rather more extreme and playful extension of some gentle blindfolding and tying up, it's about a game of power and play, of control and subjugation if that's what the sub wants.
I don't really 'get' gimp masks either, but with a little experience I would assume it's about hiding your identity, removing your facade and being an indominate object, an objectified and non personable item to be toyed with, it's part of the sub personna, some like to be just controlled, some like to be objectified, and some like to be 'dehumainised' into a subjugated item of pleasure or pain, for the control of the dom.
It's a fascinating scene, and I dont 'get' latex gloves either, tried them, did nothing for me, but then I never thought I'd get a kick out of walking two men around on a leash in a club, but I do, it's not sexual as a dom, for me at least, not initially, as a sub (I'm a switch, as in I like to be dominated and to dominate) part of the loss of control can be tied into the loss of identity, maybe that's what the mask is about.
Mind you, if it's about restricted breathing, that's a whole other world!
A
What a fascinating topic! I think that it is perhaps a touch pertinent to distinguish between the vagaries of the sexual entity and normal life. In general we tend to have preferences visually and physically which assists us in discerning between potential mates, those of us of a more liberated and libidinous persuasion may take this to a new level.
We all have our own preferences, turn ons, attributes we find attractive and physical components which are on our 'wish lists'. I personally used to be somewhat of a body nazi - in that I chose to play with only those that met some very harsh and specific proscribed desires of mine, that was boring and led to a lot of crap sex with aesthetically pleasing morons.
Over the last three months I have been incredibly fortunate enough to meet some fabulous and intelligent lovers that push me mentally and physically.
Perhaps herein lies the distinction between swinging and sex as opposed to random fucking. When you have the chance to build a rapport with anyone then you establish intimacy and understanding of one another's paramaters which ultimately leads to more engaging and satisfying sex. If you wanted to merely get your end away you could go to a bar and get laid, meeting good lovers means you get to explore lasciviously and hopefully enjoy yourself all the more.
I think that we are all entitled to be discerning, we're here to have fun and finding the right size or colour of playing partner or lover is all part of the fun, we can be discerning, we can say no, but we ought to remain respectful and be considerate of others. Personally I think it's a little stupid to ascribe any attribute to an entire legion of ethnicity simply based upon one's own experiences be they positive or negative, maybe that was what caused some offence? For example - I rarely eat potatoes, yet as an Irish woman it is one of the rather less original attributes ascribed to me, oh and I've not seen any leprechauns recently!!
Ok time for sleep maybe - what a fab topic.
Amber xx
that is one of the funniest things i've ever seen! axx
I got asked by a sub last night at the F club if I could give him some cock and ball torture. Is this really what it is?
Bizarre!!
I have to say that I find the new layout much less instinctive and user friendly than the old format, it looks like someone has taken a 'mac' format and tried to replicate it with all the random colours and smooth edges. They are trying to be too clever with the format and before it was much simpler, less difficult to figure out, I mean it just took me about ten minutes to figure out how to add a bloody photo to my profile and now it has to be 'vetted' what the ruddy hell is happening to this site!!!!
Hmm ranting over, I'll get off my soapbox and try to figure out how many hamsters will die as I try to post this...
Hello all,
Myself and my partner are looking to meet up with either a hot bi guy or a hot bi girl (ideally both) couple or not for some relaxed and deviant fun tomorrow afternoon.
My partner is fun_boy_free and we're both intelligent, relaxed, discreet and respectful partners only interested in mutual fun and a nice time.
(No moaning about not being a 'couple' profile from SH fascists please!!!)
So if anyone is free tomorrow afternoon and would like to meet up for some fun, message me at my account, we'd be happy to meet for a glass of wine locally to ensure that everyone is happy.
We'll be playing in south east london tomorrow.
Thanks for checking out the add and fingers crossed!!
Amber xx
My first instinct on this was the anonymity should be reserved for the claimant and not the defendant, but upon reflection I think that the defendant should be afforded the same right.
If the police are looking for victims to come forward then this appeal should not remain in the dominion of the media, but in better treatment for all victims of , male or female.
For the record, I think that anyone making a proven false accusation of should be afforded the sentence that would be attributed to the defendant if that person were found guilty.
It's shameful and detrimental to real victims.
Amber
I think that if you are sufficiently ignorant about the risks to yourself and your other multiple (should you be so lucky) partners to engage in wanton unprotected sex, that you are proving yourself to be an unworthy and flagrantly disrespectful playing partner.
I even find the term 'bareback' disrespectful and incredibly unsexy. I understand that there are differnt criterion for each person choosing to live this lifestyle but personally, I find the concept that individuals would autonomously choose 'sensation over safety' to be rather incongruous with the precepts of this lifestyle as I see it.
It's simply, for me, a matter of common sense, even if you're told that the person is 'clean'... how mnay people on this site actually go and get screened more than once a decade?
We can all be carrying something without knowledge, including the flu!! Surely it's much nicer and simpler, and more importanly more intelligent and considerate to just slip on a condom so that all of your partners can play in the knowledge that they are at least 99% protected from the contaminants of your previous encounters.
I don't want to sound like I'm on my soapbox (which is foaming nicely) but I do think that this is about respect, for the self and for others rather than a matter of preference.
I don't sleep with established and screened partners without condoms so why would I give a stranger this preferential treatment?
I don't think there is a need or a place for unprotected sex in this world. Giving yourself up to being open sexually with strangers is a minefield of risk, insecurity and hopefully comaradery - why intrude on what is a tricky balance by offering such a lack of respect as to suggest that your back might be bare, and seriously what on earth does your back have to do with your cock in this instance?
Rambling amber....
I think I've been somewhat narrow minded in my appreciation of the older man, meaning up to 15 years older, generally I've turned down some very hot guys in their late teens and early twenties, mainly because I have younger brothers in that age group, and it just somehow seems 'wrong'...
That said, maybe time will tell and I might have to match 'peak' with 'peak'...
I'd hate to be discriminated against because of my age but maybe it's just a part of the general 'appeal'..
I like large soft towels ironed ( I have acknowledged ironing issues)...
Clean, big, egyptian cotton if I can afford it, a lot of my towels have hideous hair dye marks on them... ah well!
Signing off after a flurry!
Not for a 'mcflurry'... time for duvet loving me thinks...
(rabbit - neglected? :,()
Night all
Amber x
Hi Flower,
Hmm, a bit of autocratic dictarian (that I don't think is a real word but I like it) mod discretion/discrimination.
I've just joined an online lit site to try to write stuff there and got very very confused by the terminology.
Clearly I'm rather 'out of the loop' when it comes to online activities. For example I don't bleat like a bird to tell people what type of loo paper I'm using...
Now I am rambling.
What happened to the SH 'Magazine' I saw advertised a few years ago? I've never seen one, and now you pay to use the site with 'extras'...
At least it's still free - or is that just because I've been a member for a wee while.
I do think the site has changed, and I don't like the split forums, but I do like the fact that there seems to be a lot of people on the forums that are familiar even to one as sporadic as me!!
Sorry for the rambling.
Amber x
:sticky:
xxx
:D:D