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lusty_modesty
Over 90 days ago
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Quote by wild rose and the stag
i once went to see a complete idiot at relate, hadnt got a clue about relationships, or sex for that matter..........did nothing for me or my ex
staggy

I do appreciate you admitting that Relate was crap. I heard they're so fucking useless that as soon as you start talking about problems relating to sex, they don't wanna know.....
Maybe the more expensive fee paying sex therapists are better but not all people have that kind of money.
Dogging works for you because you have found the right partner but you know it wouldn't have worked with your ex wife.
Quote by RedHot

A TV documentary definitely mentioned something about stagnating sex life but thanks for rectifying that fact once and for all.

Ahh! I see . . . it *must* be true that we've all taken up dogging to help our flagging sex lives because *it's been said so on the telly* :!:
Tracy-Jayne
There you go, at least you've sorted out the misconception of view held out by the wider public. And so if there are couples out there whose sex life is stagnating and are considering dogging (after they've tried Relate etc), then the message coming from your side is 'don't do it'because ordinary people just don't have what it takes...to do dogging.
Actually (and thank god) I'm very relieved to find this fact out that there really is a massive difference between people who do dogging (maybe swinging) and people who just can't (haven't got it in them), therefore shouldn't be doing it.
Media therefore has given false hope to couples with stagnating sex life...and false image of dogging people who never had any problem whatsoever. I hope we understand each other now.
Jokingly (and half meaning it), I might have recommended a 'stagnating couple' to try out dogging but now I know I shouldn't because of what I've come to learn. I hope the clarity has helped sort out couples' perception seriously misled by the media.
Quote by Dawn_Mids
However it would have nice to find at least one couple admitting that their sex life was stagnating and to have claimed that dogging can work. No answer but it doesn't matter...

Well it must matter as you fetched it up again rolleyes
I am only guessing here but the main reason I think you can't find a couple to admit that dogging saved a stagnated marriage is because you are talking utter bollox biggrin
Yeah right, the bullocks that the media has fed the public to believe. A TV documentary definitely mentioned something about stagnating sex life but thanks for rectifying that fact once and for all. Couples with stagnating sex life, so dogging is definitely no, no, no for them then...that's one answer more than enough
Quote by Dawn_Mids
So you are now judging every other marriage or relationship by your own experiences. Strange confused
Lusty, why so defensive when I only asked a simple question dunno

Me judging and defensive, maybe I am, maybe I'm not, too tired even to want to care arguing...the answer in life is how you choose to see things and feel comfortable with it and nobody can take that from you...
I wanted to care about stagnating couples (sorry not referring to those who never had this problem in the first place, just consider yourself lucky) enough to accept that dogging might be the way forward but I still don't know the answer and it really doesn't matter.
However it would have nice to find at least one couple admitting that their sex life was stagnating and to have claimed that dogging can work. No answer but it doesn't matter...
Quote by Dawn_Mids
I was going to comment but before I do lusty_modesty, I haven't looked so please tell me if you are married or not dunno

I hope you didn't think I was a single, unmarried, independent woman whose life is so uncomplicated (I believe there are such women) and used to hearing people with marriage problems. Perhaps that could be nice but....there's always something
You don't have to be married these days to feel married, yes I have experience in a committed relationship to be able to share problems about relationships with other couples...
Quote by Serendipity
Sorry Lusty but I'm with Staggy & Wild Rose on this, their reply didn't contain an attitude of any type and was no different to mine in tone. They merely addressed a rather large assumption on your part and put across their view......there was no superiority or immaturity about it, just a statement of fact based on their sex life.
Also, I must stress that no-one here is responsible for encouraging couples whose sex life are stagnating (shit really does happens) to consider dogging
Couples considering dogging are made welcome, many of the experienced couples here offer advice and those of us who enjoy watching will chime in too from our perspectives.......but dogging is another form of sexual expression, we're not here as an alternative to Relate. Problems in peoples marriages, be they sexual or otherwise are not something that I feel qualified to try to resolve and I imagine many others would feel the same.

Even then why do I feel less insulted (or even not insulted) by you than the staggy lot.
My last statement wasn't a serious suggestion of dogging for stagnating couple (as if I could!!!) , I appreciate that everywhere relationships are a lot complicated than that and okay I was adding 'poking fun' sarcasm brought on by the heat...
Believe me, I agree with you entirely with the marriage stuffs you quite correctly pointed out but it sure as hell stinks when people keep coming to you and tell you they tried Relate and all the conventional stuffs and it still doesn't work. I was trying my best to be broad minded enough to come to accepting that pershaps swinging and dogging may be the way forward for such couples but I'm not so sure anymore. Maybe you're either a swinger/ dogger or not, maybe it's just as easier for some couples to be Born Again Christian as I have seen in few troubled marriages.
Quote by duncanlondon
All women always know.
Unfortunately modern clothing sense is inappropriately taught/acquired/applied with some women. Resulting in embarassing and compromising situations.
However there are more traditional but equally flattering clothing styles with which a woman can always feel confident and admired but not ogled.

So nicely put, I agree with DuncanLondon.
I also agree with Onlyme1981. It's kind of amusing when you catch out guys ogling and they tried to hide it...especially those shy, introverted guys, just loved them in situation like this. Yeah now and then it's a nice feeling to be the one to put a glint in a man's eye even if only for a flicker of a second, he might go home and have great sex with the wife that night. I have noticed some wives like to encourage their husbands to admire at hot, young sexily clad girls on TV etc…it’s such a refreshing attitude.
However, I couldn’t get hooked on exhibiting myself on too many occasions because you get so used to the ogling, the novelty starts to wear off and you start resenting men for being predictable and weak…you start to want more from him…to see you as a person than just body parts.
Quote by wild rose and the stag
think couple put on the show because of the great adrenalin rush it gives back to their otherwise stagnating sex life. Women who have sex with the doggers are another ball game though, not for me.

whooooooooa
just a minute if im reading this right, stagnating sex life????? no way, best sex ive ever had is with rose this last twelve months, staggy sex life yes not stagnating!
do i assume anything other than the missionary is what couples do till things go pear shaped? when they move to the spoons or doggy stile ,the sex is going down hill??
dogging is just another branch of a sexual adventure for us, it certainly isnt a remedy for a problem!
xx
Well thank god you’re the lucky ones that your sex life has always been fantastic…and thanks for setting the record straight but no thanks for the tone of your defense that only reveals your immaturity that just doesn’t fare up well with the sort of reply you get from Oldcouple and Serendipity. Have the public hurt you so much to make you this insecure to reply the way you do?
If this is the sort of attitude you have, how do you expect couples whose sex life are stagnating (shit really does happens) to consider dogging. Drawn from your example, it could lead to conclusion that if your sex life isn’t great anyway, then dogging isn’t going to make any difference to these stagnating couples. If this results in less dogging conversion, then I’m sure doggers would have something to worry about.
Or am I make the assumption that there are enough of your 'superior type' to keep the country, dogging happy. Fair enough, then I won't go preaching dogging on stagnating couples, so all you husbands out there...lock your wives at home and join the ever increasing doggers crowd. wink
Quote by oldcouple
We have not always been old;-) We have been swinging before the term was in comon use. My wife is usually the one who gets couples going. The doggers like her to approach a couple who seem nervous. There is nothing to be afraid of as gary boys are but children and most doggers are polite and respectful or they get the elbow;-)
old couple

Yeah I had it figured too that you had started swinging way back..........
Interesting you should say that, I was about to say that if I was thinking of putting up a dogging show myself, I too would be soothed by your wife doing the goading...as opposed to group of strange men from outer space. You're from such an interesting world.
I think couple put on the show because of the great adrenalin rush it gives back to their otherwise stagnating sex life. Women who have sex with the doggers are another ball game though, not for me.
Quote by oldcouple
My wife will often go dogging while I remain in the car waiting as my legs are not up to much. Sometimes she will pair up with one of the local doggers who may be nervous of gary boys or something.
old couple

From your username, you imply you're old and yet you feel it's safe enough to go dogging. Just wondering, does your wife get VIP treatment with polite doggers stepping aside a little for her to get a decent view of the show, presumably it's usually inside a car. I would have liked to get to know you personally, it's not everyday you meet an old couple like you doing what you do. I'm so enthralled. wink
Quote by Serendipity
Excuse me, I'm not common........I was brought up proper!! :P
So yes, there are women who dog rather than show and no, I don't turn up with a male partner biggrin

Sorry I thought all the doggers here were men but still most of them are. You don't need to be brave to go alone?
I was thinking of danger not from the genuine harmless doggers but from other intruders e.g. drunk boy racers, rapists, drug dealers...who know what. Perhaps this is why the police try to get involved for people's own safety since there is no guarantee things won't go out of hand.
What are the people who provide the sex show inside their car called?
I know women are needed to make a dogging an event - I quote somebody, 'No Woman No Dogging' but is there ever such thing as woman doggers?
Even if there is, are this mostly watcher women who have turned up with a male partner?
Quote by johneboy
I don't mind a good g-string/posing pouch on a man. I've worn a few in my time and all have been very funny.


innocent bolt
Willy-phant G string above: Does it stretch when the penis is erect so as not to tear the fabric? biggrin
Shit...with a body like that, could change my mind about G string on straight men. :twisted:
A joke one from me of car sticker (humble apology if mentioned already):
Regular Dogging Couple, Follow this Car. :twisted:
Quote by Vix
Thx for the reminder, mine must be due a change.
*edit* et voila! *edit*

Sorry Vix, never had problem with your image, always knew you were 110% woman but the new image, WOW what a great treat! Thanks. biggrin
:smitten: :smitten: :smitten: :smitten: :smitten: :smitten: :smitten: :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:
Does the Avatar image confuse you when you’re a newcomer? When I see an Avatar with parts of female body, naturally I assume that person is a she. Then I’m taken by surprise when I read the post to find that the person is a he.
Also I confuse with some less obvious body images as male. :doh: Some Avatar images are neutral but your mind still conjures up image of that person being male or female without bothering to check the username first. Okay what a Pratorama! I thought someone was a woman, then a man, now I know she’s a woman, I think I’ve got it right this time. :confused:
Quote by HornyRed
do ladies find men in string underwear sexy?

Yuk, so awfully hate even the thought of it. Ahhh bikini are nice...on women but you can't go lusting on men, can't you?
However if you're a gay man, I don't have a problem with them wearing G string.
I cant see that its "Yuk or hate" for straight/ bi men to wear, but fine for gay men to wear. dunno
Fair enough, overall hate G String on men with the purpose of trying to impress the opposite sex. But I'm perfectly willing to make concession for gay men who are doing to impress men, so why should I moan? I thought flexibility in attitude was a good thing. wink
Interesting question. Have put up with a few months before but a year is just unacceptable. When a guy or girl comes to me with this, I feel strangely pressured to help them out as if it's my duty so I have to run away.........
Quote by fabio grooverider
if you just take a look at the ad sections...
number of ads of men seeking couples: 5590
number of ads of couples seeking men: 1340
off the top of my head 5 times as many....
number of ads of men seeking women: 7805
number of ads of women seeking men: 124
you do the maths!!!!

He's right you know, it does look like it's tough being a single male swinger. Every now and then we get thread from a disillusioned guy so be prepared. This is more than just a one stop shag shop, it requires effort to part of the SH community; post a few threads, make yourself known and be likeable and who knows....
Quote by pleasureseeker
She doea enjoy it all but its always me taking the initiative..............., if I dont nothing happens. All I want is more reciprocation, to be surprised, more spontaneity.

I don't think there is anything wrong with people just because they have low sex drive as you're implying your wife has. Also I believe it's possible for some people to be perfectly happy the way they are; just like your wife who really isn't bothered much about her sex life.
Sometimes there are other things in life (money, fame, status, work, hobby, food, sport, family life etc and a mixture of these put together) that are far more important than just sex to make a person happy. As someone pointed out in earlier post, your wife doesn't need fixing probably.
So could the problem lie with you, you who has to suffer in frustration for having a higher sex drive. Say if you were Golf crazy, you might have been less frustrated because golf would come first and make you less bothered about your wife's lack of interest in sex. From here I have nothing more to suggest other than as an impatient and blunt person, I find myself agreeing with how Dune has resolved his situation.
Quote by freckledbird
We all have been there at one stage in our life.

Have we? I'm very very lucky then and a one-off (two-off with hubby) because I haven't. And I used to take the contraceptive pill.
Okay not you then happy bird, happy? I accept there will be contradictions but thought I mention it after seeing Vanessa telling sob stories on telly. I've never taken pills myself so you're in better position to challenge this stupid claims. worship
I saw on TV perhaps Richard and Judy show that some women who have been on the contraceptive pills run that risk of ruining their sex drive (and that it's something you can't get back). I remember Venessa Felt acknowledging on TV that she was certain the contraceptive pills had ruined her ability to enjoy sex...thus the husband leaving her. Please shoot me dead if this post is too patronising but we do feel for your frustration. We all have been there at one stage in our life.
Quote by pinkfloyd
do ladies find men in string underwear sexy?

Yuk, so awfully hate even the thought of it. Ahhh bikini are nice...on women but you can't go lusting on men, can't you? I know opinion will differ. However if you're a gay man, I don't have a problem with them wearing G string. I am one woman who prefer an understated quality of sexiness in a man. cool
Blimey, this thread is fucking up a storm...it has more drama than your average humble Eastenders or Coronation Street.....and strangely, I'm lovin' it.
The tit-for-tat bantering is sooooo original...Eric not Derek, you kind of reminds me of Simon Crawley. I'm neither being kind or unkind, just my thoughts. wink
Quote by jamnat20032003
another shitty treatment thought up by someone from a beauty parlour to fleece us out of our money lol
dont see the point in it really

I don't know what but it could be the Porno watching public putting the pressure on Porno workers to set the trend back into the Public into giving Beauty Parlour the reason to expand their product range...= more business. :lol:
A bit of clarification about anal bleaching. I doubt it's not painful. You need to go to a specialist beauty parlour...get on all fours and the lady will smear the bleaching cream around the brown anus with a small brush. OKay some people will have bad skin reaction.
Quote by davej
Sorry for being crude but has anyone tried it or would consider having it done (including men)? :shock: surprised smile biggrin :twisted:
Joke, "Do Ya Think My Anal is Sexy?"

Does this practice get the skin back to its original new born colour or does it go beyond that, cos if it actually whitens it, I've got to say no....I've got a dark skin colour and I don't want to bend over in a dimly lit room and look like a television set thats just this second been turned off......
The idea is that some people likes to make the anus same colour (not darker) as rest of their body. When having anal sex, I guess some people are very errr...how shall I put this?.....Anus Vain? cool Again it's a question of personal taste.
Sorry for being crude but has anyone tried it or would consider having it done (including men)? :shock: surprised smile biggrin :twisted:
Joke, "Do Ya Think My Anus is Sexy?"
Quote by Eric not Derek
I have been reading stories in the "Swingers Stories" (sic) area and some of the threads here. I have a question.
Is it necessary to be functionally illiterate to be a swinger?

Although, I've noticed some spelling and grammatical errors here and there, it doesn't stop me from enjoying the reading though...so much so that I copy them and insert the missing comas etc etc etc myself (for me to help follow the story) as I read on my WP and also because I may like to read them again in future. Hehehehe... biggrin
Sometimes the level of English also gives credibiity to the story as the author having come from that background and that to me is so wonderful because it widens my world...let me get a peek into their world. If everybody wrote in Shakespeare's standard, I wouldn't get the feel of who's telling the truth...and that takes off the edge of reading. Just my thought.