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Mechanical__Man
Over 90 days ago
Male

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Quote by chrishants
Most true doggers would find staying at home with a bottle of wine and a book, almost as boring as watching daytime TV.....................wonder if you get off on that as well?.....................lol
Chris

Well Chris funnily enough the answer is no, as I am pleased to say I don't have a TV!, - certainly some female company (but not in a lay-by!) would be preferable to sitting reading a book alone. I also have to say if somebody tells me they find reading books boring it certainly tells me a whole load about them whether they are doggers or not.
Quote by jomu
Pardon me asking, but what the f**k are you doing on here then ?
Most people I know would rather not be sitting alone drinking wine.
In terms of oddities, it seems to me that on this site YOU stand out from the crowd.
?

Yes you're right, I'm sure I am the oddity here, I usually hang out in the other forums but when I looked in here and saw your first post I was just totally amazed how anybody would want to devote so much time and effort to something like that, and then having to sleep in a lay-by at the end of it all. If it comes to a choice between sitting in a dark lay-by watching blokes prance around in skirts and wander about with their dicks hanging out and staying at home, I would choose staying at home with a good book and a bottle of wine everytime!!
Quote by jomu
As I said, expedition.
A voyage of discovery.
Done a few times a year, this one was a waste of time. Usually,. they are better than this.
However, I've found another picnic site so maybe this weekend will be better.
All the well known sites are packed with wannabees, and wouldwannabeesbutain'tgotthebottle.

Well I have to say I've never been into dogging but judging by the number of posts here it seems a lot of people are pretty keen and good luck to them, whatever lights your candle as they say. I don't often look in here but your post just caught my eye, I have to say I just don't see the fun in spending your Saturday night driving around from one carpark to another then sleeping all night in a lay-by, if thats what you have to do when you go dogging - no thanks!. I was feeling pretty sorry for myself Saturday evening because I was sitting out in the garden with just a book and a bottle of wine for company, but in comparison I reckon I had loads of fun!, but like I said each to his own. Hope you find what you are looking for in one of those dark carparks, good luck.
Quote by jomu
Packed the free gifts for the natives....beads, bangles and pear drops.
Set out from home, first stop Brogborough. Nothing.
Second stop, MK. Nothing.
Next stop, lovers lane deep in the countryside (much fun in the recent past but nowt on Saturday night.)
Next stop, Pittsford reservoir. Loads of assholes having a barby. And loads of parked cars full of single guys, plus me. One couple came in and immediately went out. Didn't blame them. Another couple in an estate plucked up courage and carrying something like a blanket headed towards the fields....followed by 4 guys. Who stopped at the gate and went no further. Puzzling. Is the field on the other side a no-go zone ?
Then in came a jap tonka toy 4wd. Loads of brain-dead-testosterone-packed idiots in, who decided that insults to all-and-sundry were the order of the day...out they duly went after getting no interest.
Got bored, went to the A43. Empty, just one lorry and two cars. No scrapheap derby yet.
Waited. Waited. Waited. Waited. Went to sleep. Rudely awakened by some prat pushing his face through the window.
0045z. Nothing, scrapheap derby running though. About 15 cars doing the hokey-cokey. One guy wandering about in a knee length skirt, effect spoilt by the boots, as in work type.
Another stands by the car and gets his dick out. Interesting. There is someone with a smaller dick than me then.
Told him to fuck off. Decided to move to the other side, get out of the gayzone.
Waited for the mystery woman renowned to show up, sometime. No show.
Nothing new there then, if I went to a nudist beach everyone would be wearing boiler suits. (I did go to a nudist wood in Cambs last week...all over 60...felt almost at home)
Decided to go at Checked the gay park in Northampton on the way back.... ..the place was packed...at least someone shags in the hot weather then, almost restored my faith in inhuman nature.
Next stop, the A428 layby.....single guy flashing....brakelights, that is. Pass. Someone will tell me later that there's a couple who go there at 3 in the morning and flash their brake lights for attention.
Checked the layby near police HQ....black guy wandering about with no kit on...well, it was hot.
Fell asleep driving down the bypass, good thing about the rumble strips at the side. Slept in the next layby...woke up at dawn and went home...
Dogging.
Can't beat it.

Bloody hell mate!, do you do that regularly?, sounds a bit of a sad existence, still each to his own I guess . . .
rolleyes
Quote by midlandsmale39
just a thort cocka but the ladies may want a damn good shagging as oppozed to a write good speeling test

Have you tried reading some of those ads? - some are just bloody unintelligible!
Maybe I'm just in a grumpy mood tonight (perhaps its the heat!), but I've just been idly browsing through the SH ads section . . . have some of these people never learnt to spell?, if not why not use spell check and then paste the text in?. Surely if you are writing a 'ad the whole idea is to create a good impression especially if you are a single male with the mass of competition you have, what sort of impression does it create if you
can't even put to together a coherent ad of about half a dozen lines without stupid spelling errors? . . .
Quote by tiga
seeking wankers only! to cum over wife l8t 2night while she is dressed in pvc and thigh pvc boots. cum over her tits while she is tied to a bench and blindfolded, then go, so the next 1 can have a go. max 4 males so be quick! i will pic 1 to cum OVER her face NOT in her mouth no pic no go!

Well personally I can't really say I would find that very fulfilling where ever you are, but then again maybe that's because I'm not a wanker.
By the way maybe I'm being a bit thick but could someone explain what a "wife I8t" is please????
Quote by Heather
I get plenty of quick shags in car parks, thanks! :twisted:
But each to their own... personally, i think the only sad thing is staying with someone you hate because society and guilt say you should. Casual and anonymous sex enhances my relationship. When I've been had every which way but lose over the bonnet of a car, I have a yen to get inside my guy's trousers and claim him all over again... :twisted: :twisted:

Heather, I rather think you missed my point, but I suspect that may be deliberate, but anyway . . .for a couple casual and sex with other partners, whether they be other couples or singles is ok if they are both comfortable with that, that is what swinging is really all about. What I was doing is looking at this from the singles point of view and I don't believe a quick thrill or sex in a dark carkpark is very fulfilling in the long run, you still drive home alone and still wake up alone in the morning. if you are ok with that great, but I would imagine not that many people are really deep down. I suspect this is what Jaffaman has come to realise. I would also guess that a high percentage of the single guys behind the hundreds and hundreds of ads on SH would also really prefer a serious relationship and I'm afraid they are very unlikely to find that on SH.
To clarify my own reasons for being here, - I'm here just for a little fun, I'm not looking for casual sex, I would eventually like to form another relationship but I know this is not the place to look for that.
Well done mate . . . I know this post will probably get me loads of stick, maybe even deleted as its not exactly the sort of positive post they want on SH I'm sure, but . . . good luck to you, go get a life!, sitting around in dark carparks late at night sure isn't much of a life that's for sure!. I know this does not apply to everybody but I sometimes think there are a lot of very sad and lonely people on here, (maybe I'm one of them) certainly when I look at the single guys ads I think this, all looking for something and something that they are not going to find in a quick shag in a dark carpark! - sorry but its true. rolleyes
Quote by redstilletto
A serious question for the guys and the girls here . . .
how often do you masturbate and how?
I will kick off with this . . . since becoming single again I average about four times a week using the Venus machine (pic to the left), Ok over to you . . . wink

ok your not a sales rep are you
for the venus machine
:twisted:
Please see my post above . . . rolleyes
Quote by ahtrini
you must seel em dont yuh?

No, but thought about offering to be their UK agent, (it's made by a American company) . . . I'm just a very impressed owner thats all, but I think you will find
most people who have bought one feel that way. Mind you had a load of doubts
before buying it and the Sybian and maybe wouldn't have if me and the ex hadn't
had a small lottery win.
Quote by ahtrini
No no no, that thing even near to my cock! At that price No no no

Yes well bloody expensive I'd be the first to admit, got it as a package when I bought a Sybian for my ex, you got a discount then . . . but expensive or not this thing does what the hype says, not going to go in to great graphical details here, but when you cum with this thing its like the best ever - honest!
Quote by gilbert
why a machine? whole point is DIY
Gilby

Simply because this machine does it 10 times better than by the traditional method
and feels as close to real sex as you can get . . . .
A serious question for the guys and the girls here . . .
how often do you masturbate and how?
I will kick off with this . . . since becoming single again I average about four times a week using the Venus machine (pic to the left), Ok over to you . . . wink
Quote by maverick8391
I am a very mature older guy but still very active problem is my wife gave up on sex 7 years ago.I reply to loads of ads by couples and singles but I must say without a lot of sucsess.I just wondered if anyone else is in the same boat and if so do they have any tips.I am really quite a nice bloke but I still need sex so I have to get it somewhere otherwise whats the point.

Well you could try this . . . .

. . . . certainly works for me smile
Quote by clarensteve_lincs_69796
Hi Mechanical Man,
Welcome :welcome:
Well if your good with that sort of thing i know someone who will have a pulsatron in need of a fix soon lol :lol: :lol: :lol:
Clare,xxx
wink

Forgive my ignorance what is a Pulsatron?, that's a new one on me! biggrin
Quote by JudyTV
Hello Mechanical Man,
A warm welcome from me, I hope you enjoy the forum. If you become really popular then perhaps your Venus machine will need less use wink . Have fun anyway.
JudyTV

Thanks JudyTV and everybody for the warm welcome . . . and maybe you are right but certainly getting my money's worth from it at the moment! :wink:
Quote by ChairmanMiaow
Hi Mechanical man, welcome to the forum!
What's your experience of the sybian/venus machines like? Should people believe the hype?
CM

Me and the then Mrs had a small win on the lottery, not big but big enough to buy her a decent second hand car or indulge our toy fetish, in a moment of madness that's what we decided to do. First of all we were just going to buy the Sybian but they were doing a deal if you bought the Venus too so we decided to buy both.
In answer to your question - yes, they really do what all the hype says. The Mrs came close to passing out once with the sheer intensity of it. As for the Venus, if you said the old traditional hand method was a 5, then the Venus would have to be a 10! We certainly had more fun than we would have had with a second hand Ford Fiesta anyway! biggrin
Hi everybody,
Just joined Swingheaven and this is my first post . . . I'm a 43 year old guy, divorced about a year ago and now looking for a little fun. While browsing the posts in this forum I see there's quite a bit of interest in the Sybian machine, my ex and I bought one about three years ago and also at the same time we bought a Venus 2000 machine, sort of the equivalent machine for guys. The Sybian sits in the cupboard gathering dust at the moment but Venus 2000 gets a fair bit of use!. wink Hoping to find some other people who share my interest in high tech toys.