Srne's Forum Posts | Swinging Heaven

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Srne

Over 90 days ago

Straight Male, 45

0 miles · Tyne and Wear

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25 Aug 2016

Hello girls, guys, and in-betweens smile

smile

I used to post quite prolifically a good 10-7 years ago but the past 7 years has been CRAZY BUSY with work, business, travel, more work, more business and more international travel. Anyways...... I've been on and off (the site) here sporadically for the past 10 years and mainly missed the forums. Been in and out of relationships with non swinging vanilla type/s so haven't been meeting up really as when single Ive been often out of the UK or genuinely too busy building things business wise to even think about trying to actively and properly search out meet ups. Well, I've now got myself a rather stunning and slightly younger female (she's 31 but looks 25 BONUS) who wants to explore her sexual horizons as previously she has had extremely limited sexual experience. So we are embarking on new adventures and so far we have only done quite mild things together but she is building up and we are off to our first swinging club together this weekend. If any old skool SH members remember me be great to touch base :) Also new folk it's good to talk. Anyway, its great to be properly back now that life has settled significantly and I've got a new fledgling swinging partnership to get going I will be back to the site much more. Anyway, like I said, its great to be back here :)

25 Aug 2016

Hmmmm ghosts. Well there's a topic. Have I seen a ghost? No. But I have had quite a few unexplained happenings. Once I physically felt someone sit on my feet while I was in bed in a hotel that in the morning I was told was haunted. In Edinburgh once I was on a ghost walk and in the catacombs a guy who was totally sceptic was pushed to the ground, I was laughing and something scratched my face. Lastly I lived close by a graveyard (old plague graveyard) and one night we climbed the medieval church and we were sat on the roof and the fucking bell rang one loud "BONG" and it was not an automatic bell and nobody was inside. There have been other lesser incidents and when I asked a guy who is into paranormal stuff why, he said some people just attract more paranormal stuff because of something like a magnetism to it. Nothing's happened for a while like.

9 Aug 2011

The riots in London and other parts of the UK. A sign that the counrty is heading for meltdown and social unrest due to the PC brigade and the "Human Rights" era, or just an excuse to kick off about anything? IMHO Criminals these days have little or no fear of the law becasue they can be protected under the human rights, political correctness and social namby pamby rules that seem to govern giving them the kind of justice that might actually bloody work or stop them from doing it again. Society is at fault here we need to toughen the fuck up on people.......
SH Forum posters I open up the floor for the great UK riots and human rights in society debate.......

9 Aug 2011

Don't know what to make of this post? Was it a funny, or a general chit chat?
Either way keep up the posting the Forum needs it. But maybe work on the comeidic skills wink

wink

9 Aug 2011

Quote by meat2pleaseu
The Cafe is really dying off at present so it is a bit of a shame....

Might be down to the lack of posting room due to the bitching, posturing and ever expanding ego's of some people rolleyes

rolleyes

I couldn't agree more. What the hell has happened here for it to get like this?

8 Aug 2011

Quote by noladreams
.....Is this normal ?

Maybe it just a phase she's going through... wink

wink

Blame Glee :rascal:
I was going to say that exact same thing! :giggle:
Yes me too. Glee is respensible for a lot of things lately. Like normally "uncool" parts of school life suddenly becoming the thing to do. My nephew who previously wouldn't even watch a boyband video on MTV because it was "too gay", is now part of a "glee style" club at school.
Dresses differently, even tal;ks less like a chav these days, thanks Glee, I was thinking maybe I'd have to kill him before he become a chav!

8 Aug 2011

Quote by Staggerlee_BB
Morning folks,
I've been reading this thread since yesterday, and as a noobie simply digested the atmosphere without interference.
But now I have to chip in my penny's worth.
Is the whole object of the forum to allow people to express their individual points of view?
I cannot commenton the past, but it seems there is life out here. A four page thread already kinda proves that, don't you think?
Live and let live I say.
For isn't the beauty of us all much like a wild flower arrangement, not in our similarities, but our diversity?

Great comment. Welcome to the Forum. As you can see it is rarely smooth in here. There are 3 types of people here in my humble opinion (not that I own the site or anything) bad ones, good ones and the ones that pretend to be good ones. The trick is to see through the bullshit of the bad or pretenders and enjoy the good ones. Glad to read your thread, get involved and have fun, it's not like it's real life wink

wink

Go on tell us who's what and which and why goongoongoongoongoongooooooooooooooooonnnnnn
????
No Staggerlee, I believe people can and should make up their own opinion about others. Everybody is different, i would not push my opinion of anyone upon anyone else. I make up my own mind and stand by my decision. Like me some may like me for my honesty, others may think I'm confrontational? God knows but i don't mind. Not a bit like bear baiting giving it thr goon sort of thing?

8 Aug 2011

Quote by tweeky
Poison Ivy was not a porn film so to speak but it did get me going :rascal: Drew at her best I would say.

Yes remember this film vividly. :twisted:

8 Aug 2011

I agree with the comment that you shouldn't even bother creating a new thread saying goodbye. Why bother?
It seems a bit attention seeking that sort of thing. If I was going to leave the site or have a "flounce" (which I think this probably is due to the fact you have left via a new topic on the cafe)then I'd just leave and say bye to those I chat to regularly via PM.
I'm sure you will be back, but if not I'm sure the site will survive. The Cafe is really dying off at present so it is a bit of a shame that a regular poster leaves but you're your own master and will do as you feel.
I'm sure anyone who "was that way inclined" will check your account to see when you have last visited the site. Something that i know some users do when people create a "i'm leaving" thread. Whatever the agenda of the people who do it, I think it says more about the OP of the "i'm leaving" thread when they create these threads then keep logging back on to check if they have "please don't go we like you" replies.

4 Aug 2011

Quote by mrs-bmw
Perhaps they just thought "sod it " and paid the ransom :giveup:

I have no idea why but this made me LOL (and i mean actually LOL).

4 Aug 2011

Can't for the life of me think of the name and hoping it comes back to me while typing but has Holly Vallnce in it an is about 3 girls ass kicking in a martial arts championship. Bit like Charlies Angels (total rip off to be honest) but with hotter girls. Ah there it is jumped into my mind called DOA or dead or alive. Oucccchhhh hot, hot, hot.

4 Aug 2011

Chicken or Pork Parmesan in the North east. Google it. Once you have had one you'll never look back.

4 Aug 2011

Quote by orch80
Morning folks,
I've been reading this thread since yesterday, and as a noobie simply digested the atmosphere without interference.
But now I have to chip in my penny's worth.
Is the whole object of the forum to allow people to express their individual points of view?
I cannot commenton the past, but it seems there is life out here. A four page thread already kinda proves that, don't you think?
Live and let live I say.
For isn't the beauty of us all much like a wild flower arrangement, not in our similarities, but our diversity?

Great comment. Welcome to the Forum. As you can see it is rarely smooth in here. There are 3 types of people here in my humble opinion (not that I own the site or anything) bad ones, good ones and the ones that pretend to be good ones. The trick is to see through the bullshit of the bad or pretenders and enjoy the good ones. Glad to read your thread, get involved and have fun, it's not like it's real life wink

wink

29 Jul 2011

Some great comments, some great debate, glad to see it's still there.
I always read well thought out replies with interest, even those that disagree with my point, it's good there is flickers of the old forum I remember.
Sometimes i let off steam here about the place and what I think is wong with it, maybe i'm an idealist but who knows?
Whether you have agreed, disagreed or even had a go at the flow of my post, nigh on all of the comments have been pretty spot on in one context or another becauyse people have taken the time to think about an issue and air their right to an opinion.
All hail the forum cafe, maybe you are not gone after all?

28 Jul 2011

So.....
I haven't used SH for a while and just found time due to life/work to get back online and have a few forrays onto the Forum, and peruse the occasional add.
I have to be honest and say that the general feeling of the place has changed over the past year and a half. There seems to be less people using the forum and a majority of thos belong in what I call the "SH Hierachy" or old regulars.
It's like a popularity competition at times, and reading through the posts/threads I can see how different people fit into different leagues (akin to football due to the amount of supporters each has).
The "Premier League" users (usually the SH regulars of old) command great respect as anyone having a go at them or going against their opinion are slammed and a marauding gaggle often build up in their defence and pick apart the who has dared to question them.
What is really evident lately is the first division and up and coming second division users who are in the "promotion zone" by begining to gain "friendship" with the old regs by agreeing with them/ courting their favour and showing their alligience to their posts.
Joining in with the "in jokes", having a pop at all those who are in the "sunday league" or relegation zone.
I realise more than most how this site is a reflection of actual social environments but it's beginning to resemble one of those workplaces you go to where a hierachy of colleagues have clanned together and oestrosise (spelling probably going to be picked up by someone i'm sure) the new worker unless they fit the "criteria" to be initiated into the group.
An example of this is the "thanks a lot we are leaving SH" thread currently on the forum.
Yes I had my doubts about the story but tried to give constructive criticism or advice rather than have a direct pop at them as some people actually gain coudos/respect on here for being blatantly cruel or even dare i say it borderline bully.
These people have supporters who say "that's just the way they are, they are a direct person and have a right to an opinion" etc etc ad infinitum, which is just a PC way of justifying and finding excuses for blatant elitist and the bullying.
I am pretty much non biased on here, I'll call a spade a spade, if someone is an idiot I'll often tell them they are being so but not to court favour or gain "supporters" by being the "blunt user type" who seems to be above the AUP's at times. I don't really care about "supporters" and that's what this post is about. Elitism on SH Forums.
People have asked "what's happened to the Forum?". Anyone with more than one brain cell can see it has literally become a ghost town from how it used to be 18 months ago when there was always new posts popping up. These days I can log on 24 hours later and no new threads! This never used to be the case it used to be a real lively and vibrant place. Well, read between the lines, I'm sure the more astute among you, or those who don't have a social jostling inclination will agree? New people come on the forum and make mistakes when they are new to this type of , something NeilinLeeds pointed out to me recently about my own early posting days but noted that "we all get there in the end, even if it does take some time"! Superiority complex stuff that and a prime example of the point i am making (and NOT against AUP's im sure?). Most new users dont fit into the criteria right away as there is a learning curve and a certain way to express your opinions etc on a forum like this, but being a SWINGING site people are often misguided and think it's all smut and filth talk (which mostly is true lol

lol

). I think we as users should recognise that and rather than attack them like a pack of wolves (trolls), maybe have a kinder word and remember what it was like when we were first here?
I know this will rattle some cages, but i can live with that. I don't need support to voice my opinion on here, I've got thick skin.
The elitist users will no doubt come up with a cleverly worded thread to try and discredit this opinion or ignore it altogether, and the first division and second division promotion zone types will create a less cleverly worded discredit due to their inferior knowledge of the way this place works, and their enthusiasm to show their support to enhance promotion prospects. So.....I open up to the comments of the forum users.

27 Jul 2011

I'm not sure what to make of this but if it is a real life situation not an attention seeking post (because there are some really weird people kicking about)then i feel for you.
However, there are a few massive holes in the information you have given.
If it was someone unknown then think through the people you have met who actually know who you are via the site, as this is the first solution.
The fact that they posted it through your door or sent it via royal mail shows they know your address, have you had swinging meets at your house or been followed home after a meet up?
Another option and one that people often dont realise is that if you use a wireless connection or dongle to log onto the internet people in your wireless broadband signal strength area can log onto your connection and see what you are looking at online, they would have to be close. This maybe a disgruntled neighbour who happened upon nicking your unlocked wireless connection to use the internet and saw you using swinging heaven and therefore had access to your account while you were online opn the site.
There are various ways this could have transpired if it is actually happeneing but cancelling all your accounts on fb twitter SH etc is pointless, the damage is done in terms of getting useable balckmail material.
The police will find it diffiult to trace them as they have left no electronic forensics unless they have contacted you by email or phone. They may be able to get DNA or finger prints from letters but that is if the person is on the DNA database.
How did they ask for payment? this could be key and central to how to trace them get in touch via PM if you want any help I work in this sort of sector and may be able to provide some asistance to the local police force if they want to pursue the case.

26 Jul 2011

Quote by noladreams
Maybe it's just me, but I'd be put off by the idea that this is 'his' fantasy. If I were meeting a couple I think I'd like to feel it was something both of you were into.

No, it's not just you, I think a lot of people would feel the same.
And yes it will be very hard to find sucha woman. If it's something you really want to happen maybe hire an escort?

25 Jul 2011

I had the same problem when i went from a couple to single male on here. One minute inbox absolutely rammed full everyday, the next (when i changed to a single male) very few people even replied.
The solution i found with a little more success was to write a very informative and well written (in my opinion anyway) draft mail that included all my details, what i was looking for/could offer, my likes and dislikes and do's and donts. I sent it to anyone who took my interest and saved the hassle of writing individual messages every time. It included the line "im sorry this is a draft email but after spending a long time sending mails and not getting replies i found that this solution saves a lot of time if you are not interested, and includes everything you might like to know if you do, as a single male i'm sure you can understand i'm the majority and i'm sure you get a lot of mail".
It increased my success slightly but saved my time MASSIVELY! Good Luck mate.

25 Jul 2011

Ok, this thread leads on a little from a recent topic but I think it is important enough to thread again and comes from a different angle.
Here goes.....
My job involves a lot of security awareness and i like to think i'm pretty clued up on the dangers of the real world. I realise how unsafe certain things a lot of people take for granted are, and am often dismayed at peoples blind trust in people they meet via the internet.
Do people using the site take enough care to ensure their safety when meeting up with people and have there been any dodgy situations that people might share to try and raise awareness of the dangers of meeting people they don't know without properly thinking through the situation.
I know i might sound like a killjoy and there are people out there who thrive on and enjoy the spontaneaty and that's fine, each to their own, but what about those that just don't have a clue and might end up in a bad situation?
I say this because this weekend i was speaking to a young couple i first met back in the days when i used the site as the male half of a couple. I bumped into them and we went for a pint (which ended up being 4 or 5) and got talking about.......yes you guessed it, swinging.
I moaned about being a single male for a while, said i had barely used the site other than for the forums and recounted a recent tale about a nut job husband of a woman whom i was having NSA sex with with her husbands knowledge and how it transpired etc,etc.
I asked if they were still using the site and they said no, and i, ever the nosey bastard asked why.
They then told me they had had a "bad experirience as well" and it had put them off using sites. I might add here that this particular incident was not linked to usage of this site but of a similar sexually orientated site.
To cut a long story short, cos boy can the female talk lol

lol

it went along the lines of........
They recieved a reply for their add for cpls seeking cpls on the other site from a cpl not too far from where they are based. After a resonable amount of email/inbox correspondence they asked this couple for a phone chat but were told the couple worked shifts and were rarely in together. Their pictures looked great and this couple sent pics of them seperately and together which reassured the couple i met, so they did the same.(This is where i cringed) "Well we thought they had to be genuine if they had pictures together and seperate".
So without a call they decided to meet up and took the sensible precaution of arranging the meet up at a mid way local pub, they waited and the couple never showed up.
They went home and recieved an inbox saying the couple were so very sorry but the couples babysitter had let them down and this couple couldnt make it out. The cpl i know said it was fine and then the other cpl started to say how horny they were now and how they wish they could meet as the fem was so turned on. They then said to the cpl i was speaking to how they wished their webcam was working (another cringe) as they would love to cam to cam with them. So.......the cpl i had previously met said they would turn their cam on and did a bit of...well you can use your imagination.
A week later they arranged another meet up with the cpl but this time were asked if they would do an "outdoor meet up" as the fem was "worried she might be spotted at a pub" (another cringe as like anyone would have known what was going on) but my friends agreed as by now 40 or more emails had been sent, a meet up had been arranged but cancelled due to an unforseen event and they had cammed to the cpl so had built up a "trust with them" (their words not mine).
Bare in mind this couple are still only in their mid 20s and were only early 20's and totally new to the scene when this took place so their niavety can be forgiven and understood. They, probably like a lot of people took people at face value (myself and my former playmate did when we first joined even though i was quite security concious even back then without this great little thing called hindsight, and we made mistakes)and were not aware that there are some fucking determined and warped people about.
Anyway back to the situation...
They agreed to meet at an outdoors location near to a well known beauty spot and were really excited about finally meeting this couple they had been talking to for 6 WEEKS. They arrived at the location and it in their own words was "really secluded and out of view (he cringes again) and waited in the car. About 15 minutes after the arranged time and having no phone number to call they started the engine and were just about to drive out of the place and "a guy appeared out of the bushes and started waving at us". They drove a bit closer and the bloke knew them but they didn't recognise him so asked what was the matter but had the good sense to wind the window down and not get out the car. It then became evident it was the male from the cpl they were due to meet but with about (and again i quote directly) "2 stone and 10 years on the pictures".
The bloke chatted to them through the open car window and said his girlfriend had bottled it but he came anyway so as "not to let them down again" and started to pester them to "get out the car and have some fun anyway seeing as they were here". They sensibly said no and drove off saying they only wanted cpl/cpls fun and the bloke said ok and walked off back in the direction of the bushes he sprung out of.
They emailed the "couple" as soon as they got home but never heard from "them" again and after a complaint to the site they used the account of said "couple" was deactivated.
I was shocked to say the least but not surprised having encountered some very weird people during my 6 year swinging "career", but i think that awareness HAS to be raised about the dangers and maybe a STICKY about the do's and don'ts and possible things fraudsters try based on users own experiences?
A few things here obviously spring out, the guy was the same guy but prob using pics from ten yrs ago as he did have pics that resembled a younger, less portly him. He probably did have a wife as he had pics of him and a female together in sexually suggestive poses but she probably had no idea he was talking to cpls online as no phone calls were made even after repeat attempts by the young cpl i had previously met. Why would you not if you were asked? I used to suggest it straight away when we wised up and if on the second time there was a myserious reason or a "she is shy" it would be block and delete. Even now as a single male i ask for a phone chat with people i meet and if a cpl then insist on speaking to both parties.
What really sticks out is the lengths fraudsters will go to in order to gain trust and seem genuine and people new to the scene might fall prey to pic collectors, fraudsters getting off on the deception or worse somebody violent.
Anyone else have any experiences to share that migh click with a few people who might be in the same situation without realising it and help some of the people on here who I'm sure are duped on a regular basis?

18 Jul 2011

Getting a phone number from a mobile is a good idea but has it's flaws.
Most people who are having a bit of a sexual adventure behind their partners back will just buy a pay as you go phone and have it unregistered.
Obviously this means that it will be untraceable UNLESS they have paid to top it up by credit card at some time which means the police will be able to trace it if needed (only in serious circumstances not if he has stood you up or you later find out he is married obviously).
For safety advice about meeting strangers I would recommend the following hints and tips.
Never meet anywhere other than a place and time of your descision as locations etc can be controlled if someone has sinister intent in mind. Maybe ask to meet at a busy pub/restraunt like a service station toby carvery etc. These places are discreet but have excellent CCTV and have 30 day computerised back up of footage. Due to the location the person would probably have to drive. The carpark will be covered so you would also probably be able to trace the persons car registration number in a serious incident.
If possible get the persons car reg and make discreetly, say you will be staying for another drink when they go to leave and watch them leave without being noticed or leave at the same time and say goodbye and faff about a bit in your vehicle till they get to their car and jot down the plate. If they have nothing to hide they wont be clandestine about things like this.
Insist on a phone number as they may be unnaware of digital forensic tracking and have a contract phone or hae topped up pay and go by card.
Never meet someone who is cloak and dagger about anything that you ask for. They clearly have SOMETHING to hide. Be it a wife or girlfriend or a mental illness you just don't know what your getting yourself into.
Use your common sense and your instincts if in doubt don't meet.

13 Jul 2011

Quote by neilinleeds
Lot's of us Mr Lilly become aware at some point that we are but little men in the world. An awareness of our own mortality assures that, eventually, inevitably, noone will give a flying fuck when we're gone? Unfortunately, in the microcosm of the world that is SH, some of us occasionally fall into the trap of imagining someone somewhere will care? The mods are there to remind us noone will, eventually. Oh well! :P
Anyroad up, back on topic, before we make Srne's thread all about Cunty . . . .
I believe I may have taken you to task sometimes Srne? Forum search function takes me back 4 years or more, but looks like a decent post even with the benefit of hindsight? Upon reflection, you're not so bad after all? :P We generally tend to get there in the end? ;)
N x x x ;)

Can't really remember ever been "taken to task" Neil, but then I use this place as a bit of light relief and enjoyment ansd don't really take it THAT seriously (mostly).
Sometimes I come and rant, sometimes I come on and post well reasoned logical stuff, sometimes I come on to take the piss. I ALWAYS come on to enjoy it.
I take things seriously very rarely but when I do on here, I always remember it's no more than a click to log out and get back to "the real world". wink

wink

12 Jul 2011

Quote by GnV
My idol is kenty777.
I'd have loved to been a fly on the wall in SH towers when Admin read where he told them they could stick their moderators.....
Sadly missed in these forums for his off-the-wall rhetoric and fearless contributions.

Haha I remember kenty he was one of my "ones to watch out for" i did think he was absolutely mental to be honest but hilarious. I must have missed that thread or did it get deleted?

12 Jul 2011

Ok, so I'm gonna be a bit presumptious, a whole lot of egotistical and a dollop of "who the fuck does this guy think he is", but I'm just gonna come out and say it.
I have just wrote a "fucking awesome" thread (quoting myself is a show of my self obsessed thread today BTW).
It's on the Cafe for anyone who would like to see a literary masterpeice of a thread in all it's glory. Yes there may be spelling mistakes and a dash of incorrect grammar but it's still class, "sticky worthy" is a thought that springs to mind lol

lol

I'm being a bit "tounge in cheek" for anyone who has not read between the lines and thinks I'm the most omnipetant (all powerful for the uneducated wink

wink

but probably spelt incorrectly), self pontificating bastard ever to grace the cafe pages. But it's a great way to introduce my thread question.
Have you ever written a thread you think is just absolutely awesome but has got little recognition or few replies?
Or.....have you read a thread and thought "that is fantastic?" (other than mine obviously :twisted confused

confused

This is the opportunity for you and your forgotten or unnapreciated thread to shine and enjoy the glory that it should have recieved by those who didnot have the good taste or sense to recognise it's genius or merit.
Or for those sickophantic types who want their SH pals to have their 15 minutes of fame, nominate you favourite thread. The one that sticks in your memory as being superb.
If this has been done before then I'm sorry, but as i'm feeling so elated due to my phenomenal thread (which you can all vote for on "thread idol" by ringing 0845 blah blah blah calls charged at local rate, mobile calls will be higher) I won't even check :lol:
It also gives me the opportunity to read some much needed great threads without having to search through millions of old threads.
So "THREAD IDOL" begins......

12 Jul 2011

Ok, I'm gonna put my wading boots on and wade right into this in a more serious modus operendi type manner.
I've been here 5 years (shit i'm saying that a lot lately like I deserve a medal or badge) and enjoyed the Forum from day one.
My first few posts were, to say the least, misguided fumblings having not really understood the way or "flow" of the forum and I either posted rubbish and got shot down, or took offence when people commented and disagreed with my viewpoint as I thought they were being argumentative.
I had a lot to learn.
I had a go at a few people who's humour I didn't quite understand and probably had a few old regulars rolling their eyes in an "omg not another one" type manner.
I stuck in and in doing so learnt there was more to just coming along, banging an opinion on a thread and expecting people to agree with you just because you took the time to post it and biting people's heads off if they didn't.
The forum is a hightened reflection of real life conversation. As Ben_Minx said people are a hightened sense of themselves on here, as unlike in real life they have the comfort and security off a computer screen instead of a face to face situation where their personalities and opinions and therfore comments would probably never be so direct. In the ral world people's sense of humour is rarely quite so blunt and/or controversial and sometimes antagonistic.
This place is like a fantasy social life. An escapist utopia for those that are bored/frustrated or just don't fit in with the "real world". In one way or another we all come here for a reason, and those reasons vary from person to person. Some use it to air opinions they wouldn't speak about socially for one reason or another whether that be a lack of confidence, controvesy of subject, or the worry of being shunned or rebuked by what they say. Some come to let off steam, have a rant, take the piss or even to release some literary pent up writing hobby or passion. Whatever people come here for, the variance and difference of every single person make this place, and give it that special something we just keep coming back for.
In the past 30 hours i've used SH in th last year or so, I'd hazard a bet that 29 have been spent on the forums. I hardly ever go to the adds or any other part of the site., I'm here because of the madness, the bitching, the trolling, the humour, the stupid one's, the funny one's the confrontational one's and the new "i aint got a fucking clue" one's. The correct people's spelling and grammar ones, the I think i'm an author, I'm so fucking important agree with me one's, and the "your plainly just fucking mental" ones (probably my favourite type)!
None of that really matters here as it can all be forgotten about by the time we switch off our monitors. But we get absorbed by it, take it personally sometimes or just generally come on here for a good old whine.
WHY?
Because we are all human. We have emotions, personalities and feelings. Our lives and emotions change from day to day. If we have a good day we might post something positive, perhaps a comment on someone's thread or a thread of our own. We have a bad day and whine about something just to vent our frustrations here that have nothing whatsoever to do with SH, the OP's thread or even the price of fish. It could be the only place we have to vent it?
God knows, all I know is this. We are all humans with a myriad of differences, emotions, opinions, lifestyles and ideas. We come here to the forum with our own agenda, for whatever reason known only truly to ourselves and these ideas are collated in cyberspace on a discussion forum on a swinging website, where we open ourselves up to others ideas, opinions and whims and their individual agendas for being here, and what happens is.......Well the very thing we are all here commenting on in this very thread. Surreal when you really think deeply about it. Or is it just me? See we are all SOOOO different.
Do I think there are bully's on here? Yes cyber bullying is a real and previlent situation these days and I have witnessed it on this site.
Do I think people take things too seriously sometimes and say they are being bullied but actually are just being to sensitive? Yes it happens all the time. I've done it myself in the early daysbefore i understood all this forum stuff and got my head around it.
Do I think there are cliques or a "hierarchy of posters"? Yes of course, this is a social site and some people are more socially appraised or valued than others. In real life there are people who make or have lots of friends and SH is a parody of real life social situations. Some court favour with these people and kiss their ass and agree with their every word, some battle against them or have problems with them because of their "higher social status". Again this is evident in "the real world".
Do I think "trolling" exists? Yes some people go around the forums looking for posts to shoot down or shit on.
Do I think some people have a set agenda on SH? Yes obviously we all have an agenda on here, whether it be to get a shag, or empower ourselves in one way or another (something i strongly believe is the basis behind "trolling") or to make us feel accepted, or popular in a way we aren't in the "real world" or whatever/whyever we are all here. In life their are people who care about people and people who dont give a shit. Genuine people and fraudsters. Good people and bad. We as adults should all have the initiative to realise this about the site.
Do I actually give a shit about all this? No I just fucking love the forum and especially the Cafe for all it's problems/benefits, pluses and minus's and for all the weird, wonderful, crazy, bitchy, lovely, great, completely fucking stupid, and generally odd folk that make this a place i come and spend my time. It's my choice to come here, as it is yours.
People who get scarred off by the trolls maybe don't have "what it takes" to be a regular here or maybe have a misguided sense of themselves or even others using the site. Whatever happens there will always be a forum, there better be or im hitting the "cancel subscription" button and that IS always an option for anyone who doesn't like the site for one reason or another right?

12 Jul 2011

Quote by amatuerman
Coughs, who is amatuetman, some fake disguised as me?
Shut up amateutman your an asshole
And to the rest of the posters who have replied to this thread I think your comments are all bollocks (even those that either agree or disagree with the original poster).
See, amateurman, everyone gets on so well here and there is absolutely NO sniping, digging or bad feeling. The world is such a wonderfull place when there are contrasting attitudes and opinions.

I just really wanted to insult you and not even give you the dignity or respect of spelling your username correctly such are my sniping ways! wink

wink

11 Jul 2011

During my travels I have been about a bit. In Cambodia dog meat is widely eaten by the locals who are of the poor spectrum of society (that makes up about 70% of the population).
I was shocked at first, seeing dogs in small baskets but then spoke to the owner of the hotel I was staying at.
I was informed that this was just the done thing and financially made good sense. Dogs mate, have pups, then the pups are reared and when old enough/big enough eaten. This ensures that there are not thousands of stray dogs all over the place (they dont have the money/resources to neuter their dogs) and provides a valuable and readily available food source.
I have lived in/with a few different cultures from various parts of the world and have eaten some strange things.
One thing is always evident, it is resources vs finances. We in the UK and Western worls take SO much for granted. Even the poor end of the social spectrum usually has resonably decent nutritional opportunities. WE moan far too much. How many times I've heard "I'm skint at the moment" and the person still has enough money to buy food, put petrol in car and buy things that would seem like utter luxury in other parts of the world that we just take as the norm. Some people in the world really are absolutely living from hand to mouth and if there is an abundance of dogs mating and the meat is there, they eat it.
We probably see it as sickening because we in the UK and western world see dogs as pets. That's because we are quite affluent as a nation and very, very few are living anywhere that could be construed as hand to mouth. We have a benefits system that ensures we have enough to feed us and housing benefit to keep a roof over us. If we didn't and things were tight, and I mean really tight, I'm sure Rover would look much more appetising when our kids were starving?

11 Jul 2011

IMHO honesty is probably the best policy for you both.
Your probably to some degree or another unhappy and women are very perceptive creatures and she can to some extent possibly tell "something" isn't quite right/working out etc?
You only get one life, live it. Sometimes it means hurting someone else, but they can then move on find hapiness elsewhere and you can move on and become happy.
Your wife might surprise you and be tolerant/fine with it?
She might be disgusted and leave you?
Either way living a lie is not fun for either of you.
Just don't make any stipulations on her and things will work out how they are best. Worst case scenario is she believes she is inadequate or not enough to satisfy you without realising bisexual urges are just something you can't help and she doesn't understand and takes it personally.
BUT.....again only you can gauge and judge YOUR situation.

8 Jul 2011

Ok, yesterday I was very tired and wrote this thread whilst sleepy and may not have got my point across clearly, SOOOO maybe this has accounted for some of the "snipey" rather than constructive comments, as obviously there couldn't just be snipey and critical people on SH? wink

wink

Right the points of my post are this: Just to put it in lay mans terms for those that, jump to conclusions, form their own critical opinions due to their own critical outlook of everything or generally jump on every post that isn't from one of their clique pals........
I entered into a NSA sexual relationship with a woman who told me on the first occasion she had a husband who knew she had sex with others, and whom also had sexual relationships with other people himself.
(I was not cheating with her as she told me they BOTH did this with others)
I was told they never talk about it, and that i would never be discussed.
(They frequently talked about things I did with the female, compliled emails together and texts)
I was told her discretion was important to her and she asked that I don't talk about her to my friends etc.
(Discretion IS important to me and to find out I had been discussed with her husband and they had lengthy discussions and made plans about what myself and the female got upto is to ME a little weird given the discretion/never talk about things story)
We had sexual contact etc sometimes on camera which I was told was for her only and she asked that my copy was not shown to anyone else.
(An element of trust was required as i have a high profile employer and she knew this, we discussed this and she told me it was for her personal use NOT for her and her husband to get off on. I showed nobody)
We discussed that meeting or having any contact with her husband would be a bad idea and I told her I would be uncomfortable even though he knew she "did her own thing with other people". I thought it would personalise it if he had a face and an actual person to think about as it might cause HER problems and possibly me.
(They arranged to have him meet me completely unprepared or unnaware at a pub after I had just had sex with his wife, which to me is just wrong to do to anybody)
I asked for your comments and I appreciate them, I also aren't crying into my cornflakes that some of you have been critical, or even dare I say it, bitchy.
I as well as most clued up people on the forums know that there are people on the site that delight in stamping on posts, being generally passive aggressive, and even bitchy. We generally just let it go over our heads, but the lack of comprehension as to my point riled me a little if I'm honest.
It wasn't a case of getting the wrong end of the stick, some just brought their own stick into the mire. I have seen this a lot, mostly with new posters or those that are not in cliques, and I wish it didn't go on but it does. But that's a whole different thread!
I don't need to "grow up" and am not whining that I'm "not as important as I thought" I know my own self worth thank you very much. I have been swinging for 6 years now, I've had my cake and eaten it. I have been in 3 some situations, cuckold situations before with couples. NEVER have I been lead a merry dance by a couple in this way, where by almost every fact I thought about the situation was completely untrue. As others have noted, even in NSA sex there HAS to be an element of trust and lines were clearly crossed.
IN EDIT:
I recieved an email an hour ago asking for a meet up with both parties and politely declined stating I was happy to have sexual contact with the female in the way we had been previous but that due to the nature of how things had turned out I didn't think that going down the road of 3 somes with them would be what I wanted.
I have recieved an email from the husband being generally very aggressive, saying he wanted to know exactly how many times I had seen his wife, exactly what we had done and where. She has since rang me saying the guy is going mad saying she is "hiding things" and this only goes to show that my first initial thought that this was a strange situation was bang on.
Otherwise why all the lies, why not just advertise for a cuckold situation etc? We live and learn I suppose, but to those that mocked and said I was whineing.......Hmmmm maybe I know a little more about situations that I'M involved in :wink:

8 Jul 2011

Quote by bIoke
Before I get into my thread I'd like to say hello to everyone on the Forum, my SH pals (Bloke especially if he is still around), and explain that even though I am very infrequently on the site these days, I miss it terribly and still love getting the chance to read posts on the Forum........

Hello you handsome, fit b***ard - glad you're still alive and kicking you big metrosexual piece of fine, straight male ass :thumbup: x
Thanks my friend, hopw your well! x

8 Jul 2011

Quote by Mr_Lilly
can someone summarise in less than 50 words please.

Bwaa Bwaa, cake and eat it,Bwaa Bwaa, I'm not as important as I thought I was.
Obviously got completely the wrong end of the stick....do people not actually read or just make assumptions based on what they think is being said?