There used to be a monthly magazine called Rendezvous. You sent off a Polaroid and a postal order, and 2 months later you got a letter from someone who lived 100 miles away. It was VERY hard work!
In practice, of course, it was much easier to shag the woman in the post room, the mucky barmaid, neighbour's missus, wife's best friend, etc. With all the complications THAT entailed.
I think the interweb has probably saved more marriages than it bust up.
**** Oops sorry, should have been a reply to post below.
Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
garden
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 72
Straight Female, 66
0 miles · Devon
Forum
Warming the Bed
I have a good friend who's had a bit of a bad time (lost her job, home, husband in a succession of hassles), who's now rather bravely trying to rebuild her life.
As she doesn't have net access (lives out in the sticks, and not much money), I promised to try to find her some nice old-fashioned dates, to get back to normality. I first looked at "vanilla" dating sites, but the guys all seemed to be either very wimpy and inadequate, or potentially dishonest. Neither of which is what she needs.
It seemed simpler to place an ad on here, where at least the blokes tend to be fairly honest about what they're looking for. But I find it's against the AUP (you can't place an ad for a third party).
Has anyone any suggestions as to where I might trawl/advertise on this gal's behalf? Thanks!
As she doesn't have net access (lives out in the sticks, and not much money), I promised to try to find her some nice old-fashioned dates, to get back to normality. I first looked at "vanilla" dating sites, but the guys all seemed to be either very wimpy and inadequate, or potentially dishonest. Neither of which is what she needs.
It seemed simpler to place an ad on here, where at least the blokes tend to be fairly honest about what they're looking for. But I find it's against the AUP (you can't place an ad for a third party).
Has anyone any suggestions as to where I might trawl/advertise on this gal's behalf? Thanks!
Warming the Bed
I'm sure this has come up before, but can't find it in Search... my GF and I use the same ID/email addy on here, and it's a pain making it plain who's speaking. So I thought, easy... just sign up as a different person, using a different email address. Seemed to work OK, but no verification message came. Works fine on the Ad side, but not on Forums. So, reading the FAQ, I took out a new address and tried again. Same result. I can only suppose the server reads my IP address and assumes I'm trying to hack someone else's account? Any suggestions? I appreciate I could have done this by a PM, but thought the answer might also help others.
Mike
Mike
Warming the Bed
I reckon it's the blokes who look at the cockshots! I see some bloke and think, oh, yes.... he's a cracker. And husband says, yeah.... but what a tiny dick. And then I see some Hound from Hell, and say, never in a million years, and hubby says, yeah.... but look at the size of his knob. And my bloke is definitely not bent.... just wants to see me struggling on the end of a big thick knobbly one. But I've talked to other girls whose blokes are just the same. Perhaps men are just malicious, and want to see us suffer! Not that I complain (just wind up choosing doggy-position).
Warming the Bed
Face, definitely. If you dare to put it on your ad. But it's a waste of time REPLYING without one.
Body - if it looks good. Cock shot - only if it's really remarkable. Either over 8 inches, or incredibly good-looking. If no-one's ever told you it is, nope....... It isn't.
Most cock shots make me laugh.... blokes have no idea how to take the picture, so mostly all they prove is that they actually have got a cock. Poor sad limp dangly little things, they look, mostly. More blokes have put me off with pics of their knobs than have ever turned me on.... you think "who'd want to suck THAT sad little object?"
Body - if it looks good. Cock shot - only if it's really remarkable. Either over 8 inches, or incredibly good-looking. If no-one's ever told you it is, nope....... It isn't.
Most cock shots make me laugh.... blokes have no idea how to take the picture, so mostly all they prove is that they actually have got a cock. Poor sad limp dangly little things, they look, mostly. More blokes have put me off with pics of their knobs than have ever turned me on.... you think "who'd want to suck THAT sad little object?"
Warming the Bed
You wouldn't want to be a young lass, Naughty.
My old man (who ought to know) says women under about 40 are nearly always crap at blowjobs, and for the same reasons..... too much friction, too little, too fast, too slow And they've usually got no sense at all of whether he's going to go off like a rocket, or fall asleep from boredom, or start wondering where he left the plasters.
So it's not just man-bashing, here!
My old man (who ought to know) says women under about 40 are nearly always crap at blowjobs, and for the same reasons..... too much friction, too little, too fast, too slow And they've usually got no sense at all of whether he's going to go off like a rocket, or fall asleep from boredom, or start wondering where he left the plasters.
So it's not just man-bashing, here!
Warming the Bed
Seriously, 50 is no age at all.... whenever I see couples advertising for "young studs", I think, hmmmm.......beginners.
In my experience young lads (I mean under about 30-35) are nearly always crap, however nice they look.... unreliable, nervy, unconfident, come too soon, etc.
To say nothing of the fact that they have never learned to "read the signals" with a new woman....... so when they DO finally find something you really like, they don't notice and start doing something else. This isn't just some sort of innate skill, it has to be learned, over time.
Give me a fit mucky bloke in his 40s/50s any day.
In my experience young lads (I mean under about 30-35) are nearly always crap, however nice they look.... unreliable, nervy, unconfident, come too soon, etc.
To say nothing of the fact that they have never learned to "read the signals" with a new woman....... so when they DO finally find something you really like, they don't notice and start doing something else. This isn't just some sort of innate skill, it has to be learned, over time.
Give me a fit mucky bloke in his 40s/50s any day.
Warming the Bed
I hate to be discouraging, but it sounds as though you're looking for some beautiful leggy fantasy-lezzer who'll put on a nice show for you with your lady, before she and Wifey perch side by side on the edge of the bed with their beautiful pert little botties in the air, ready for you to take your pick, like some sultan in his harem.
Sadly the reality is that if you ever get a reply it'll be from some boozy middle-aged woman with a squint and a bagfull of ten-inch dildos, accompanied by a hairy-arsed fat-gutted elderly male fuck-buddy, who'll definitely want to shag your poor missus till her eyes wobble and her teeth rattle, as his part of the deal. Single attractive bi-fems are as rare as rocking-horse shit.
Sorry.... but better to be realistic!
Sadly the reality is that if you ever get a reply it'll be from some boozy middle-aged woman with a squint and a bagfull of ten-inch dildos, accompanied by a hairy-arsed fat-gutted elderly male fuck-buddy, who'll definitely want to shag your poor missus till her eyes wobble and her teeth rattle, as his part of the deal. Single attractive bi-fems are as rare as rocking-horse shit.
Sorry.... but better to be realistic!
Warming the Bed
We've seen plenty of people, over the years, between the ages of 18 and 70. Depends where you go. In the "dress-up" clubs and the fetish-type scene, average age is 20s/early 30s. In "spa" clubs, 40s/50s (in our experience). Daytime "Socials" and "Munches" we've been to seem to pull in the retired/unemployed crowds.
On the Net, all ages from Danger of Prison to Danger of Mid-Thrust Cardiac Arrest.....
On the Net, all ages from Danger of Prison to Danger of Mid-Thrust Cardiac Arrest.....
Warming the Bed
A similar situation arose a year or so ago on a sex-oriented US forum we belong to.... the whole original point of the site was being lost under a hopeless welter of look-at-me stuff. It was getting to be completely inaccessible - even outright unfriendly - to the "ordinary" members. The mods on that site imposed a limit of one "off topic" thread per day, simply deleting anything they considered to be serving one small self-selecting group, rather than the community as a whole. And they changed any headers that they thought uninformative about thread content. It provoked a storm of outrage among the Nicky-Nomates bunch, but it seems to have worked pretty well.
Warming the Bed
Can I say that the thing which really gets me irritated is when there IS an interesting thread going on, and it gets "threadjacked" (is that the word?) by folks being "amusing". So you get half a page of thoughtful contributions, then someone says something witty and someone else caps it, and before you know where you are it's a lot of bored mates having a "quote-within-quotes" laff among themselves..... and the original point (which might actually have HELPED somebody) has been lost altogether. It's nice that folks make friends on here, but the I'm-in-with-the-in-crowd stuff is very irritating to the folks who don't WANT to be part of the Inner Circle.
I do agree that the reader can easily ignore stuff that he/she isn't interested or involved in.... but hijacking threads like this makes it almost impossible not to step in the cack. Also.... maybe there could be a bit more discipline in the original headers. "You must read this" (and similar) gives you no idea what it's about, and it's usually an unfunny witticism of some sort. Must drive the folks on dial-up mad.
I do agree that the reader can easily ignore stuff that he/she isn't interested or involved in.... but hijacking threads like this makes it almost impossible not to step in the cack. Also.... maybe there could be a bit more discipline in the original headers. "You must read this" (and similar) gives you no idea what it's about, and it's usually an unfunny witticism of some sort. Must drive the folks on dial-up mad.
Warming the Bed
Cuckold is an old English word for a man whose wife is unfaithful.... now it's a sexual pastime.
If a man invites someone to share a spitroast with his missus, that's just a threesome.
If the husband prefers to just sit and watch, it's cuckoldry. Like anything else it has its degrees. Sometimes the wife and partner are encouraged to abuse the cuckold, and he gets his rocks off on that.
Some cuckolds (a lot of Americans, for some reason?) seem to most enjoy the end bit, where they use their tongues to clean up any superfluous liquids.
Yuk... Each to his own, I guess....
If a man invites someone to share a spitroast with his missus, that's just a threesome.
If the husband prefers to just sit and watch, it's cuckoldry. Like anything else it has its degrees. Sometimes the wife and partner are encouraged to abuse the cuckold, and he gets his rocks off on that.
Some cuckolds (a lot of Americans, for some reason?) seem to most enjoy the end bit, where they use their tongues to clean up any superfluous liquids.
Yuk... Each to his own, I guess....
Warming the Bed
"Man" enough? Blimey!
Sorry, but I don't want to look like a troll(op) and I haven't yet seen anything that really needs any reply. It's all, " this is OUR private club, so how dare you have an opinion? If you dare to express one, we shall punish you!"
Which is rather the point I was trying to make....
Oh and thanks, fans, for the obscene personal emails and the virus. (But thanks, too, to those who took the trouble to actually read my post properly, and have been nice enough to reply pleasantly and sensibly).
Penny Garden
Sorry, but I don't want to look like a troll(op) and I haven't yet seen anything that really needs any reply. It's all, " this is OUR private club, so how dare you have an opinion? If you dare to express one, we shall punish you!"
Which is rather the point I was trying to make....
Oh and thanks, fans, for the obscene personal emails and the virus. (But thanks, too, to those who took the trouble to actually read my post properly, and have been nice enough to reply pleasantly and sensibly).
Penny Garden
Warming the Bed
Yes, I know I'll get flamed.
And I know (speaking to mod) that you've had this before. But I really have to point out (as a new and still-hopeful member) that the first 2 pages of the Cafe at this moment contain 27 threads which are absolutely bugger-all to do with swinging or sex.
They are - irrefutably - the most popular threads. But guess what? They're nearly all started and populated by the same clique of smug chummy old cybermates, yammering on and on and on about eff-all.
Some of us don't spend our entire lives on here, LOL and ROTFL or LOAO all night at witty things we've seen on the net, or the laff we had when our kids said something cute. Some of us don't give a bugger about your suntan, or your holiday plans, or your job problems, or your car, or what you can see out of your bleedin window, or your motorbike or the last sodding concert you went to.
WE don't care how many clever GIFs you've got. We don't want to join in an opinion poll, or hear your views on BB evictions, or remember our favourite nursery rhyme.
And we sure as buggery don't want to waste half an hour clicking on links to find it's yet more pointless matey guff, when we're trying to learn something useful..... or even, get laid.
Some off-topic things are fine, I think (help with computer difficulties, as a for instance).... but all this personal chit-chat surely to God ought to be kept in the chatroom, or in PMs, or on that well-known website There are loads of sites that do this "fun" stuff.
I'm quite happy with the notion that fun and sex go together. But there's only one of 'em I can go without.
Some of us just like to plug in and read about swinging and sex. Do you remember sex? YOU used to do it, before you had computers, when you got out more?
This is by no means a blanket condemnation.... it is a great and wonderful and generous notion, SH. A credit to the inventors, and I'm glad I came. But all this waffle could kill it (just check out some old MSN groups you used to know..... all long gone, and precisely because they got buried under unintelligent self-indulgent "fun 'n frolics" rubbish).
(........puts on tin hat)
And I know (speaking to mod) that you've had this before. But I really have to point out (as a new and still-hopeful member) that the first 2 pages of the Cafe at this moment contain 27 threads which are absolutely bugger-all to do with swinging or sex.
They are - irrefutably - the most popular threads. But guess what? They're nearly all started and populated by the same clique of smug chummy old cybermates, yammering on and on and on about eff-all.
Some of us don't spend our entire lives on here, LOL and ROTFL or LOAO all night at witty things we've seen on the net, or the laff we had when our kids said something cute. Some of us don't give a bugger about your suntan, or your holiday plans, or your job problems, or your car, or what you can see out of your bleedin window, or your motorbike or the last sodding concert you went to.
WE don't care how many clever GIFs you've got. We don't want to join in an opinion poll, or hear your views on BB evictions, or remember our favourite nursery rhyme.
And we sure as buggery don't want to waste half an hour clicking on links to find it's yet more pointless matey guff, when we're trying to learn something useful..... or even, get laid.
Some off-topic things are fine, I think (help with computer difficulties, as a for instance).... but all this personal chit-chat surely to God ought to be kept in the chatroom, or in PMs, or on that well-known website There are loads of sites that do this "fun" stuff.
I'm quite happy with the notion that fun and sex go together. But there's only one of 'em I can go without.
Some of us just like to plug in and read about swinging and sex. Do you remember sex? YOU used to do it, before you had computers, when you got out more?
This is by no means a blanket condemnation.... it is a great and wonderful and generous notion, SH. A credit to the inventors, and I'm glad I came. But all this waffle could kill it (just check out some old MSN groups you used to know..... all long gone, and precisely because they got buried under unintelligent self-indulgent "fun 'n frolics" rubbish).
(........puts on tin hat)
Warming the Bed
Mention of "couples" above might confuse the poor lambs. Yes, if there are TWO couples, they split the cost, unless someone's feeling generous. Anything involving single guys, HE pays.
I've lost count of the number of blokes who very charitably offer to "chip in" towards a room.
I've lost count of the number of blokes who very charitably offer to "chip in" towards a room.
Warming the Bed
We used to reply politely to all mails, and feel guoilty that we don't now always do so.... especially if the guy is one of the few who have actually bothered to read the ad properly.
But if you reply, it reveals your real e-mail address.
And sadly there are lots of guys out there who respond to a kindly refusal by sending you a load of abuse, insults and viruses.
So sorry.... not bad manners, just self-protection.
But if you reply, it reveals your real e-mail address.
And sadly there are lots of guys out there who respond to a kindly refusal by sending you a load of abuse, insults and viruses.
So sorry.... not bad manners, just self-protection.
Warming the Bed
If you tell em, they'll all say: "Oh, how disgusting!" ......and gossip endlessly about you behind your backs, and tell all your neighbours, and stop their children coming to play with yours.
Then the men will all start slyly coming round and groping the wife every chance they get.
And the women will privately be asking her for all the juicy details about giant knobs, multiple orgasms, gangbangs etc, and calling her a right jammy cow.
Then the men will all start slyly coming round and groping the wife every chance they get.
And the women will privately be asking her for all the juicy details about giant knobs, multiple orgasms, gangbangs etc, and calling her a right jammy cow.
Warming the Bed
Ever so sorry, everyone, but the answer is that there isn't an answer to this. Even dumb bobbies can read "wiped" HDs.... that's how they catch paedophiles. Most of the above advice will work up to a point, but any determined IT tech can have a look at what you had there...... if he really wants to.
It's not easy, so unlikely...... but it can be done.
The only really certain way is to physically and seriously damage the disk by cutting it up.
It's not easy, so unlikely...... but it can be done.
The only really certain way is to physically and seriously damage the disk by cutting it up.
Warming the Bed
There are so many single men around that yes, it IS much tougher. I know that's not obvious to beginners at first, but of course it's so. Therefore you have to be better than the others to succeed. Which is easier than it sounds, because 99 per cent of the others can't be arsed to try, or to learn anything. By the way, you have no marital encumbrances and your own accommodation, which does put you umpteen streets ahead to begin with. Be patient and work at it.
Mike
Mike
