I've had a few unwanted PMs. Thatcher, that bloke without a top lip, Blair ...
I'll get my coat.
Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
unswung
3 weeks ago
Straight Male, 47
0 miles · Greater London
Forum
Off Ananova:
Childless couple told to try sex
A German couple who went to a fertility clinic after eight years of marriage have found out why they are still childless - they weren't having sex.
The University Clinic of Lubek said they had never heard of a case like it after examining the couple who went to see them last month for fertility tests.
Doctors subjected them to a series of examinations and found they were both apparently fertile, and should have had no trouble conceiving.
A clinic spokesman said: "When we asked them how often they had had sex, they looked blank, and said: "What do you mean?".
"We are not talking retarded people here, but a couple who were brought up in a religious environment who were simply unaware, after eight years of marriage, of the physical requirements necessary to procreate."
The 30-year-old wife and her 36-year-old husband are now being given sex therapy lessons while the university clinic undertakes a study to try to find out if there are more couples with a similar lack of sex education.
I can't think of a comment to add.
Childless couple told to try sex
A German couple who went to a fertility clinic after eight years of marriage have found out why they are still childless - they weren't having sex.
The University Clinic of Lubek said they had never heard of a case like it after examining the couple who went to see them last month for fertility tests.
Doctors subjected them to a series of examinations and found they were both apparently fertile, and should have had no trouble conceiving.
A clinic spokesman said: "When we asked them how often they had had sex, they looked blank, and said: "What do you mean?".
"We are not talking retarded people here, but a couple who were brought up in a religious environment who were simply unaware, after eight years of marriage, of the physical requirements necessary to procreate."
The 30-year-old wife and her 36-year-old husband are now being given sex therapy lessons while the university clinic undertakes a study to try to find out if there are more couples with a similar lack of sex education.
I can't think of a comment to add.
Quote by mysteryguy79
I was wondering if you guys had any advise for a first timer like myself on how to get into the scene. I am 24 and from warrington, i have a gf who doesnt/musnt know about it, I have been with a guy a few times but would love to meet either sexes on their own or a couple! So to be honest i am open to suggestions really!
Any Advise?
Phil
Tell your girlfriend, she'll understand.
Roger, Roger, Roger.
As much as I hate the tedious 'I Quit' card, and the increasingly self-deprecating tone (women don't dig needy, although I realise this is bad timing for condescending advice), your writing is both intelligent and witty. So, come back, but please retain a healthy slice of your cynicism. For the sake of balance.
As much as I hate the tedious 'I Quit' card, and the increasingly self-deprecating tone (women don't dig needy, although I realise this is bad timing for condescending advice), your writing is both intelligent and witty. So, come back, but please retain a healthy slice of your cynicism. For the sake of balance.
Quote by RedVelvet
Size 8/10 + tall = model like...
Size 8/10 + short = elfin, petite
Size 12/14 + tall = average to rounded
Size 12/14 + short = average to rounded
Size 16/18 + tall = statuesque
Size 16/18 + short = voluptuous
Size 20/22 + tall = statuesque to voluptuous
Size 20/22 + short = curvy and cuddly
Size can look different on different people, but all women are beautiful
You could be a poltician. :)
EDIT: sorry about the previous heavy-handed misattempt at humour (pardon pun)
On advise, in my last post on this thread, I'd like to say sorry for anybody offended by my post. It was intended as a joke, and maybe the lack of smilies made it appear to be ambiguous to the literal-minded, as I find humour can work better when it's not signposted. But obviously, with this bitter experience in mind, I can't claim to be an authority on the subject. 
I have never done the act discribed in my original post in a public place, and most certainly not in a church.
I won't use the Bill Hicks line about 'forgiveness' as it wouldn't be appropriate.
So, all I have left to say is - sorry.
I have never done the act discribed in my original post in a public place, and most certainly not in a church.
I won't use the Bill Hicks line about 'forgiveness' as it wouldn't be appropriate.
So, all I have left to say is - sorry.
Quote by Jags
The thread has been deleted cos it was a copy of a weblink posted only last week by somebody else. At least take the time to read postings by others.
Your post here has been deleted after consultation by a number of Mods - it was offensive and if you can't see why then maybe you need to think about it about a bit more! We have many members here who have strong views about that particular subject and you would have managed to undermine a belief of theirs without need. Having that activity take place in a gym or supermarkert is different completely to it taking place where you suggested you did... I wasn't alone in finding your comments offensive.
Please desist.
Well, I've pondered.
1. Fair play. Despite your condescending tone, I accept that although I did a quick look to see if said link had already been posted, I wasn't thorough enough.
2. This is the very FIRST joke on the actual general jokes thread:
Quote by daffodilbbw
A local vicar was paying a visit to one of his church members on a Friday night,and heard a loud party in progress as he approached the house.
He knocked on the door and the owner answered.
Behind him,he saw a circle of naked men,with blindfolded women moving from man to were fondling each man's cock and guessing who it belonged to.
The vicar,seeing this,said,"I'm sorry,i don't think i'd fit in here at the moment"
"Nonsense," the man replied,"Your name's been called 3 times already!"
:!:
I'm not trying to be provocative, I'm just flummoxed.
Quote by unswung
Distasteful and offensive posting edited out by increasingly angry Mod.
This site has an AUP and you have broken it twice in the last couple of days. Last chance unswung cos we are all losing patience!:x
I genuinely cannot believe this. Please explain. How can you say my post was more 'distasteful' than the original? It was a joke, at NOBODIES EXPENSE.
It also appears that a thread has been deleted, which would be unoffensive to Mary Whitehouse, God rest her soul. What's the deal?
